good manners when borrowing books

don't blame you a bit. that's why i don't borrow books...i'm hell on wheels when it comes to books. and yes, i fold the page down. i can't keep a bookmark in a book to save my life. isn't that nuts? :-D and if i don't hide the book, my cats will chew on them... i mean, i admit it, i'm hell on wheels with books. so i never ever borrow them. if it ain't mine, then i don't need it. i know that when i borrow anything from someone, i do take very good exceptional care of it because i know that i would want them to do the same. so i don't blame you one bit. and if i loan someone something, i want it returned in good shape, that's just good manners. i do have three books, hardbacks, that were signed and given to me by an attorney friend who's also a writer... and one of his books was made into a movie! how cool is that! i'm not touching those books, they've been put up. i'll read those books, but i'll buy the paperback and then it won't matter, but knowing me and books, those three are special and no one is touching 'em! so... that's why i don't borrow a book from anyone! haha!

I love books and they are my personal things .I never lend them to any one else because they would not give the same Loving care which I give to my books.

I totally dislike lending and borrowing books. Books are like assets to me, my only companion when I am alone and don’t feel like doing anything. It’s a pleasure just to read a book and fall asleep that way. I love all my books and take good care of them. I buy selectively, not to fill empty spaces in my cupboards or just to show how erudite I am. And I agree with you, I really dislike if someone borrows my books and then returns them in a bad shape. Such people have no manners, but more than them, the fault lies with their parents for not teaching them good manners. We should all teach our children how to take care of borrowed items and return them safely and in good condition. Some people even tear pages and camouflage it while returning. And the worst part is that you just can’t check in front of them and then later when you see the damage, you can’t tell them either coz they are either close friends or family members.

at least you got them back, i have lent out vidoes and books and they are never to be seen again! i tend to generally borrow from the library, hardly ever do i borrow from friends/families, but when i do, i am usually pretty careful.

I admit, I would have been upset too!! I cherish my books and want them to look nice, new as well =) I can't imagine folding down the pages.uugghhh...I cringe just thinking about it =) I just wouldn't let that friend borrow any more books.

I wouldn't be lending my books to that friend again, she obviously doesn't have the same respect for books that you do. I always try to keep my books in best possible condition, that includes using a bookmark! The books which are in not as good condition on my bookshelves are the ones I've bought cheap at second hand shops, but the ones I bought new are in good condition!

I think a person should try to return things yjr way they were when they were borrowed. As for books, a person should never fold or dog-ear the pages whether in a borrowed book or a book of their own. In case of no bookmarks being available how about an envelpe or piece of paper? That works.

I love my books and I won't loan them out, not even to my best friends. No one will take care of them like we would. I would cry [and I have] when I got books back from friends that were messed up. They never offered to buy me a new book either so, no more loaning out books. Same goes with DVD's and CD's too. Books just cost too much hard-earned money to loan them out.

I hate to see folded down pages in a book and thus I always use a bookmark. I was always taught to return things in the same or BETTER shape than when they were borrowed. It is incredibly rude to treat a borrowed item in a destructive manner. I certainly would hesitate to loan anything to this person again!

I usually buy used books, so I don't really care what happens if someone borrows them. Any of my books that I really care about don't go into the hands of anyone other than immediate family. My parents and brother rarely ever touch my signed copies unless I recommend them.

Oh that's bad! I basically wouldn't lend my books to everyone whom I know that won't take good care of my books! Like you, I try hard to maintain the "just bought" look of the books too! And I don't want anyone to ruin them for me. I use a bookmark when I read a book and I always try to be delicate! And I ever borrow books from someone, I'd make sure I haven't ruined anything. It's a good manner!

I am a fanatic about my books. I never break the spine, I will not bend a page over. I don't highlight or underline or make notes (I'll keep a notebook next to me if I need to take notes). I always use a bookmark. Although a lot of my bookmarks are just paper from around the house, a receipt from the store or even that huge strip of paper they give you from the library that tells you what you checked out. If a friend of mine abused my books I know that I would tell them that I was upset about it. I've done it before. I'm so sorry that your friend did not respect your books. That's a shame.

I like you like to keep my books looking as new as possible however i think this would be some thing that goes with time.. I usually pick up a book to start reading and dont put it down till im finished reading it... i have sever friends who take months some times years to finish a book. the longer they have it the worse shape it is when they get done ( why librarys dont allow but 2 weeks im most areas for check out) so if this friend had it for a week i would be angry and never let them have another book but if they had it a couple of months i would tell them what you expect the book to look like when its returned

Okay, I've always wanted to put a note on my books that only the "worthy" can hold it. It takes discipline and a big amount of respect to the owner for one to be able to keep and return a book in good shape no matter how old the book is. Regardless if the book is your own or borrowed, I think we must have some sense of awareness that the author worked so hard to put words and ideas into it and that these pages came from trees that God created. A little care may help to preserve the books that maybe our children and our children's children may one day be able to enjoy it.

I think that is very nice suggestion from you side. I admire it. Thank you. Next time I will remember while book shopping.

As a book reader I could not agree with you more! I too am obsessed with the way my books are returned. As a matter of fact, I do not loan them out anymore as they are returned in disrepair. If they want the book, buy it! I only use bookmarks with my books - it breaks down the paper to bend the pages. sunnywaters

you are right. I was brought up to respect other peoples property. Now i am a slob when I'm reading and eating. If I borrow a book, I am very very careful. If I damage it or lose it, I feel obligated to replace it. This goes with anything....not just books. I really try to avoid borrowing things for just this reason. As for folding pages on a book....NO...that's what bookmarks are for. If I don't have a book mark, there is always something that can be used...no need in folding pages or placing the book down opened which wears down the binding. I would hesitate to lend any more books to this friend.

I hate what some people do to books. They fold the pages, mark the book with a pen. I don't like to lend my books just because of that.

I think it depends.If it is my love oneor it is important to me, I am not willing to lend it ,if it is not, I will give them when they want it. But honestly, I seldom borrow books from others, and when it happens, i would return it as quickly as possible. Some of my friends don't take good care of other's possessions. So take care of them by ourselves. I do use a bookmark, it is convenient.