What are your expectations when it comes to your kid's school performance?
By Storm
@jcj_111776 (3216)
Philippines
September 1, 2007 12:51pm CST
My son is in preschool, Nursery level. He's almost 4 yrs old and he's speech and language delayed. Because of this, the school directress told me that they still can't see the maximum expectations they have set on him. I just got his report card this morning and his grades are very good. Well, he didn't make it to the Top 3 but I'm proud of what he's accomplished.
When his teacher gave me the report card and after I've seen the grades, she asked me if that were the grades that I was expecting. And i told her that it not only met my expectations, but his grades far exceeded it.
I won't be a hypocrite by telling myself that I'm not expecting him to join the Top 3 students. But I'm truly happy for my son. He may not be speaking yet as he should be doing, but he's pretty smart.
I won't do what a relative of mine did to her child. I remembered one time when my cousin got 9 correct items out of the 10 item questions. I was happy for her but her mom wasn't. She was even mad at her daughter for not perfecting the test. Now, that is a kind of expectation that harbors on simple cruelty and insensitiveness.
3 responses
@williamjisir (22819)
• China
2 Sep 07
When my son went to preschool, I was happy that the teachers taught them a lot. They taught the kids how to calculate and how to write some simple Chinese characters like big and small, like sky and mouth etc. It is a good idea to have kids learn things at preschool.
@williamjisir (22819)
• China
4 Sep 07
Yeah, preschool is the place for kids to learn lots of things while playing games. Thanks for your response.
1 person likes this
@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
4 Sep 07
Kids will learn a lot at preschool. Not only are they having fun and making new friends, but best of all, they are learning something new each day.
1 person likes this
@roniroxas (10560)
• Philippines
2 Sep 07
i have 4 kids and it is nice to hear from the teachers if my kids are good at school. but i dont expect to much because kids may not be good as school but they are good in practical things.....
there are kids who are academically wise and there are kids who are not. support your kids but dont expect too much.
1 person likes this
@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
3 Sep 07
Yeah, you're right. I really felt elated to hear his teacher tell me about his accomplishments. He actually surprises them with his little deeds day after day. Coming from a kid who can't talk as he should be talking.
High and unreasonable expectations usually backfire especially for the kids. They tend to feel that they can't do anything right in their parent's eyes.
@candy111 (240)
• Philippines
1 Sep 07
Parents set very different benchmarks for their kid's accomplishments including tests results and grades. Sometimes, its a reflection of how they were brought up and how much expectations their own parents had for them.
You are quite right that your relative was too strict on the child at not receiving a perfect grade. I just hope that the child doesn' develop trauma and/or anxiety over tests results to the point that she becomes so scared at taking exams for fear of failing her mom's standards.
Have you ever asked your relative why she has such high expectations for her kid?"high" might not even be the right word to use here, it is more like "unreasonable" expectation. As long as you make sure to keep your opinions at bay, maybe you should ask, there actually might be a reason to this.
@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
3 Sep 07
Hi candy. I know someone too besides my aunt who sets unreasonable expectations. And the bad thing about this is, if her child can't meet those standards, she always have damaging words for her child. Like she can never be good enough for high paying jobs someday because she's not that good. It's really disheartening to listen to those words.
Kids have their own strengths and weaknesses. My son's weakness is his inability to talk like kids his own age. But what he lacks in one aspect, he excels very much in others.
