Why do you people even get married?

I couldn't agree with you more.I take to heart the pursuit of happiness. If you got married to the person and they changed all of a sudden , then I can see why you would complain. But if your spouse has become someone you can't stand, then separate.And why marry someone that pushes your buttons before the wedding? do you think that the wedding ring wil make them change? I don't think so.Life is too short to try to live with someone you can't stand.

Alot of people get married for the wrong reasons. They either use kids or convience. Then again when peolple get married the use it as a way of controlling. The rules are different when ur married.

LOL yea I've noticed it too and I dont get it either really..but ya knwo what really boggles my mind....You have these ppl who claim they are married to "the one and only" and how they love their S.O fully, completely, unconditonally etc etc etc blah blah blah BUT then turn around and whine, p!ss and moan about everything under the sun in regards to their S.O, their marriage and so on...but in the same breath have the AUDACITY to natter at me about the type of marriage i have...YET here is my husband and I, together for 10 yrs, been through HELL together and we ARE HAPPY....and I have to wonder myself, why the hell do these ppl get married? more than that I wonder WHO they got married FOR? I mean did they do it really for themselves OR to please whining family members or cause their friends were all doin it or what?! make sense?? *crap I need coffee*

Devilsangel, I am guilty of complaining about my husband. Maybe I was wrong to use myLot as a place to vent, but I did. My husband and I were having problems and I vented. I think a lot of people do that here. Sometimes it just helps to vent and hear what other people think about a situation. I personally got married to my husband because I love and adore him. He isn't perfect, but neither am I. I am sure that most of these posting about how horrible someone's spouse is are just people venting because they are upset with their spouse and not because they truly are miserable with them.

I think people think they have the power to change their spouse and really you can't change someone unless they want to change.

I have the answer to that.....Misery Loves Company! lol But seriously, marriage changes people for some strange reason. My sister for example, was living with a man for 7 years as if they were married. He was successful, took great care of her and the house they shared, and never heard them argue or even say one cross word to one another until that dooms day they said "I Do". They divorced less than a year later. Of course I have my dislikes about my hubby, but I have so many more likes about him. Maybe these people just want some sympathy, I can see they wont get that from you! hehe Perhaps it makes them feel better, or maybe its a situation that is not so easily terminated. But I do agree with you, if your not going to be able to accept who you vowed to love, honor and cherish then move on already! Im so sure that these people that are being complained about didnt aquire these traits overnight before the wedding.

When u gt married and start a family ur expectation for ur hubby/wife increase..and that why people complaiin... ts also human nature that we only c how much we work and forget to put ourself in others shoes and c what they are going through..

You have noticed that to? I mean there are some it's rare they make a complaint and for the most part they are bragging about them more than anything. But then there are the "victims" that are in a loveless marriage to a person that could the Devil himself, to hear them tell it. Those are the ones that really need to get off the net and call a lawyer or a counselor, IMO.

Because if you are so much in love, you will really think of getting married and nothing more. It is not easy to part ways even you're unhappy with your married life especially if you have kids to consider. But you are right, you must not suffer from it. Everyone deserves to be happy.

You have exactly got the sentence I ask people. I have asked many people, and have come to a conclusion that, most of them are too weak to face the world alone, they face off the world, and as a result push one more person into some kind of weakness. Ultimately, this is the reason. But don't u forget that, it also transforms this earth into heaven, if true love manifests.

LOl but when you first get married you don't notice any of those things. It's when you live with some one that you begin to notice all their faults. I've heard it said that love isn't loving some on in spite of their faults, it's loving them BECAUSE of their faults. I must confess I still get agrivated from time to time with my hubby though. ;) It's only natural.

I don't really understand why people get married either. I live together with my partner and we have kids too. Being married will just be a little extra piece of paper, and does not have that much extra meaning to me.

Because there's such a thing as love. When you love someone, you want to be with someone, but you don't have to like everything about them.

you know you are so damn right! i mean i get it to! all the damn complaining! i mean i understand that couples have fights occasionally and thats totally normal but some people go on about it FOREVER as if thet fight with there partner every day! i mean if it's that bad then go! if u can't stand a person that much then why be with them? it doesn't make sense. maybe it's just cause i'm not old enough to understand or something like that but seriously isn't it thats simple?

Marriage is a very sacred thing, it represents two people in love can finally live together, but sometimes married life will become hell, as always with the shortcomings of the two will be fully exposed, no need to hide if it will slowly adapt to tolerate, if intolerable will generate many contradictions, and the final result is breaking up.

there are issues and points on give and take. and also, on the domain of understanding and respect. most people now a days are hot headed and seem to have lost longer patience in dealing with life. considering so many influencing factors around, some were just happy go lucky complaining without even trying the options to settle things.

So true, so true! For some reason, people seem to think that the only way to show your commitment to a partner is through marriage: a ring and a certificate. They then have all these new expectations of their new 'husband' or 'wife' that they obviously didn't have when they were just a 'couple'. Like they could deal with their laziness and lack of shared responsibilities before marriage, because it wasn't their 'duty' then. I don't know why anyone would stay with someone who makes them unhappy a majority of the time, or who doesn't appreciate and respect them. People often stay around because of obligation or because they 'love him/her even though *insert list of problems here*'. People still have somewhat archaic views of marriage - that it still has to be forever and that leaving is wrong, even if you are unhappy, because you said forever or whatever. A lot of the time, spouses just complain about one another because they are too daft to have a clue about *communication*. If you haven't spoken to your partner about your concerns and all that, there's a good chance they don't know. If you have spoken to them, and they still haven't picked up their act: leave. "It's that simple." Well said.

i think so that maybe a lot of couples complaining about their marriage is because when they got married they don't have enough and rught reasons and purposes to have that kind of relationship. marriage is a sacred thing for each and everyone and should take seriously, it's a committment that you are about to promise not just with someone you love but also to God.. the is Offering Caring, and Loving!

Also, people have to remember that nobody is perfect. I think when people get married they expect the impossible. Perfection is not possible.

i believe people get married is for something that they dont have for eg if i dont have lots of married i will marry someone that have alot of money the reason for this is because of security and some people do get married to have control over the next especiolly the man they want their want to do everything for them