I feel stuck
By Akeela
@Akeela (2078)
Trinidad And Tobago
4 responses
@avsa242 (12)
• United States
11 Sep 07
I believe you must first ascertain how your partner feels (i.e., if it is mutual). If it is mutual and if divorce is not an option you must both agree to attempt to salvage the relationship and make an effort to repair as necessary. If your partner's feelings are opposite yours then you will have to apprise him or her of how you feel. A solution can only be reached if you do this. If he or she genuinely wants to remain with you and is faithful and willing to work through problems you may want to make an honest effort to improve the relationship.
On the other hand, if you truly do not have love for this person, it will not ever work and you logically must consider divorce: it does no good to be miserable, just _because_ you're following a religious belief such as this, especially if it is what you were brought up to believe, and not necessarily a belief you have formulated on your own. Good luck, best wishes. Remember your friends in matters like this; they can help you through it.
@vinzen (1020)
• India
3 Sep 07
Hi, actually if you had given us more details, we could have helped you mre, as we dont know whats the reason for the unhappiness and why is religion holding you on to your marriage? You are free to follow your religion even after you end yur marriage. No relgion tells you to forceably stay in an unhappy marriage, at least i dont think so.
If we try to analyse the problems maybe we can find some solutions too. Reasons for the unhappiness can be either hes not giving you time enough, or does not care and has someone else, or is betraying you, or not finding you good enough, or either of you were not happy with the marriage. Maybe you have tried or are not willing to try, but if you want to stay in your marriage and try to make it work, i think you both need to sit and talk out and communicate and discuss upon things and solve yur problems whatever they are,as i feel thats the major blockage here, as you dont know the reason for his strange behaviour, isnt it, whys he doing this.
Confront and ask him, sit and discuss things out, so that if there is a problem, maybe you can work upon that and find a solution s that things are better for you.
If nothing works out, its better to leave things and move out and file for a divorce as carrying on like this makes no sense. And regarding religion, i still fail to understand why do you have to hold back becasue of that?
1 person likes this
@cutepenguin (6431)
• Canada
3 Sep 07
Sorry to press, but you say you feel sad at how your life has turned out: is this because of your marriage or because of other things like your career, etc.?
Are you and your husband experiencing other problems? Sometimes people, especially men, are distant when they are having trouble at work or with other members of their family. If you know of this, why not gently try to redirect his thoughts to something else - sports work for my husband. This can create an opening so that maybe he will be more interested in the life he has besides the problem.
Sorry you are having troubles - maybe other people will have more helpful suggestions.
@kitty1234 (1476)
• United States
3 Sep 07
Sorry you are feeling like that, my friend! I know its difficult but maybe you need to talk to your husband and see how he is feeling. Maybe marriage is not the right thing for you at this moment or maybe you can work something out to make you both happier. There is no problem in the world that does not have an end. So look ahead to the future!