I Want another baby but I'm afraid!!!! please help me....
By dorisday1971
@dorisday1971 (5657)
Philippines
September 7, 2007 6:35pm CST
I am mother of a 1 yr. & 8 mos. girl. She is the joy of our family especially that she was born 5 years after we got married. I delivered her through cesarian operation. I still want to have one more child but I'm already afraid to bear another child. II'm 36 years old, do you think it's not yet risky to have another child?
3 people like this
5 responses
@foxyfire33 (10005)
• United States
10 Sep 07
There is always some risk with any surgery but c-sections are quite routine. I'm sure your doctor will be more than happy to discuss all of this with you.
A very good friend of mine could not deliver any of her children naturally. She had FOUR successful c-sections, her last when she was about 35-36 years old. My sister-in-law has had 3 c-sections.
Your doctor will know better than me about any risks that YOU personally may have, but I would guess that you have nothing to be afraid of.
@dorisday1971 (5657)
• Philippines
11 Sep 07
Thanks. Since we are planning to have our baby next year, definitely I would heed your suggestion. I will see my OB first so I would be prepared. God bless.
@mriganayani (6)
• India
8 Sep 07
Hi Dorsi,
Before you decide to have a second baby think of the following
1.Your health conditions
2.family situation
3.financial condition
4,Your mental make up-u say ur afraid-ponder the reason why
5.Doctors advice
6.Imagine u have to take care of 2 children -will u be able to give attention for both?
write down put marks on ten for each add it up if it is above 80% go ahead for the second child
best wishes
1 person likes this
@dorisday1971 (5657)
• Philippines
9 Sep 07
Thanks. Actually the reason why I'm afraid to have a second baby is the fact that I will be OPERATED again. I always ask myself, will i survive after the operation? I know i will be a good mom who can fully support my child financially, morally and spiritually. But I'm just coward when it comes to operation.
@Bunny2 (2102)
• Australia
5 Nov 07
There might be pros and cons, but age wise it's still a good time for you to have a baby. It's not uncommon for women to have a C-section first and then deilver a subsequent baby normally. The only thing is that this is a decision that you should make soon as time is ticking away. You don't want to put it off for too long only to find that it takes a long time for you to become pregnant again. Good luck with your decision!
@dorisday1971 (5657)
• Philippines
9 Nov 07
Thanks. I'm running out of time but still I haven't decided. I'll just keep on asking my doctor in order to lessen my fears.
@Rollo1 (16679)
• Boston, Massachusetts
8 Sep 07
I had my first child at 36 and my second 5 years later. If you are fairly healthy, I wouldn't worry too much. You have to weigh all the factors and make your own decision.
Do you think you will be a good parent with enough energy for the second child? Do you believe that you are young enough at heart to be able to parent at your age? Will your child have a happy and good life with you as his/her mother? If you can answer yes, and this is what you truly want, I would not hesitate.
I won't lie to you, it's a lot easier for young mothers with all that energy of youth to expend on child-rearing but sometimes older mothers appreciate the gift of a child in a very special way that adds to the child's experiences.
When I had my second child, my obstetrician had a patient who was having her first at 45 - on purpose too. I will admit that my second was unplanned, but I don't regret having him, he is an added joy to my life, despite the extra work and worry.
@dorisday1971 (5657)
• Philippines
9 Sep 07
Thanks. Actually, all the questions that you raised can be answered by YES. the only thing that worries me is the fact that I will have another operation. That's the scariest moment i can think of right now. I always ask myself, will I survive after the operation? I know I'm healthy but I'm just coward.
@Rollo1 (16679)
• Boston, Massachusetts
9 Sep 07
What sort of C-section did you have the first time? The first time I had an emergency so it was general anesthesia but the second was a planned date, an epidural, I was awake the whole time. If you are sure you are going to need a C section, the doctor will tell you your options.
Why don't you schedule an appointment with an OB/GYN to discuss your concerns and options with them before you get pregnant? They will be able to assess your health, how you will fare in pregnancy and what type of birthing options you have. It might give you the information you need to help you make a decision.
@dorisday1971 (5657)
• Philippines
11 Sep 07
I had an emergency CS. I was half awake during the operation. I had my labor for more than 10 hrs. It was very painful!
1 person likes this
@shooting_star (384)
• Philippines
6 Nov 07
My mom had FOUR caesarian operations, she had the last one when she was 40 years old, when she gave birth to my youngest sister. My brother was born via caesarian section 1 year and 9 months after her first operation (when I was born). All of us were very healthy babies and nothing bad happened to my mom after going through all of those operations. So I guess it wouldn't be that risky for you to have another child. Good luck!
