Why Aren't Housewives/Homemakers Respected Anymore?

I think that most people have two income house holds and don't realize that you work just as hard as they do if not harder. I have been asked those questions. It is always your choice to be whatever you want to be. If you choose to be a stay at home mom there is nothing wrong with that. In fact I give you kudo's for doing it, it is one of the hardest jobs on the planet! You don't get breaks or lunch or vacation time. So, don't worry about what others think. there are a lot of people who do appreciate your efforts!

I agree with you I am a stay at home mum, with the amount of doctors apointments and all the specialist we see for my son I would not last at a work place for a month plus with the benefits we get because I am still at home and if I have to pay child care its just not worth going back to work. U get coments like what did you do all day, oh lucky you, or its not like you have a real job. So yes I stay at home and pretend that I clean the house, wash dishes, cook, and look after my son. Man I am a great pretender as those things get done somehow. A lot of times people keep going on and on as to when I am going back to work, and all that and my husband gets worked up and that we end up arguing and for a moment he forgets how much work staying home is how much work our son is and all that.

I know what I mean. I really really am getting annoyed with the situation nowadays. And it is becoming more stressful because not the men who look down on homemakers/housewives, but the women themselves! What is this? Why should they look down really on a house making profession? I have an experience to tell. My cousin got married to this girl which to me looks so arrogant. She works for a company which she claims to be very renowned. Every time she walks or talks, she will emphasis on how great she is and how great her occupation is. What makes me annoyed is whenever she talks to me, she would make a funny face as if she doesn't know what topic should she have with me. She thinks because I am a housewife I am stupid and doesn't know what is happening around the world. Urghh! I just kept quiet and let her be. Suddenly, something happened. She was at our house one day during a party. When she first reached our house, she didn't even held out her hand to me for a hand shake, as if my hands are dirty or something. I was so pissed off, so I planned something as a revenge. Lol. I went straight to my cousin, and invited him inside. But I ignored her totally. I let her be outside and if she wants to come in it is all on herself. Inside the house, I talked to my cousin about all the current issues until he got so excited to hear more and more from me. He also told me his story about his business and all. We even exchanged knowledge especially tips for blogging and how to do business online. My cousin totally forgot his wife, who then seemed very angry. I could see she was already biting her lips. Lol, lol, lol. What makes me really joyful was when my cousin suddenly asked me: "How did you manage doing housechores and online business at the same time? I really admire your skills. Not like my wife, she seldom cooks. In fact, let me tell you. She doesn't know how to cook! I wish she is like you." Then to my surprise he called his wife, and told her to follow my steps. He said she should begin to learn how to organize herself and not be lazy anymore. Her face turned red, I just smiled at her in victory. Lol, lol, lol! Am I being fair? Yes, indeed. I found my own way of justice. If there is anybody who looks down on you in the future, don't let them do that to you. Show them you have more skills and knowledge than them. I believe the next time they see your face, they will feel so embarrassed that they want to hide their faces behind the wall or something. Lol. That's my story. Have a nice day,Nykkee!

To be honest, I think the reason that people don't understand housewives is because most of us have known older women who didn't want to be housewives but were forced to be. So it's hard to get out of that mindset that it isn't something women really want. I know for a long time I couldn't understand it, because of that. Most of the housewives I knew when I was young were miserable, and wanted to have jobs out of the home but weren't "allowed" to do so by their husbands. On top of that, most of them were in abusive relationships in some way or other. So it took me a long time to realize that there actually are women who want to be be housewives, and are happy doing so. I think it's great that you have found what works for your family, and that you are happy. I think it is wonderful for you. I have learned in the past few years that there are many women who actually do choose to be housewives, and that's fine with me. I believe that people should do what makes them happiest, and just because I wouldn't be happy being a housewife doesn't mean that no one else can be. Nor does the fact that the housewives I saw when I was young weren't happy mean that no housewives are happy. I have learned that. Still, it took a while for me to learn, because it is a hard time to change your perspective on something after having seen it be misused.

I've noticed the very same thing! I've been at home for about 5 months since I lost my job and while I'm not married, I live with my mother and things run 100 times easier with me at home. Of course I need to make my own money, which is what I'm doing online through various endevors while I can find something in the "working world" but honestly I hope to be able to support myself online so I can stay home. My friends and family all think that I'm sleeping all day, watching tv and playing on the internet. They must assume that some magic fairy comes along daily and washes dishes, sweeps and vacums, cleans the cat litter, cooks meals, feeds the cat, does the laundry, scrubs the bathroom and balances the finances too. When I tell them I'm busy they laugh at me and say "doing what" or "must be nice" and think I'm watching tv. The tv doesn't get turned on unless the cat is watching pbs (she likes the kids shows) or until my mom gets home from work. Now I used to be one of those people who didn't respect staying at home and was critical of some of my friends that were stay at home moms. I always thought that I was way too "independant" and that it was a way too "traditional" role for me and that I'd be bored. I realized however that I love it, I'm so much happier then I ever was sitting in an office with people I couldn't stand. I get satisfaction from running our home nicely and I take care of the finances so my mother doesn't have to stress over late payments or forgotten bills, it's nice to give her that peace of mind. It is a tougher job then I've had and a harder one to manage but totally respectable and worth it. Great topic!

I think what my mother used to say was so right that a housewives job is a thankless job and shes literally treated and taken for granted. And its true too that everyone is seeing how much she works, yet shes never appreciated for her work, as compared to a woman who would go out of the house and earn money . I have been a home maker initailly but when the financial requirement arose, i did ppick up a job and am working now, but that does not reduce my work, people ought to realise that i am working doubly now, as i have to work out, earn the additional money and also come back home and manage the kids, cook for the family, see to the house etc, all that never ends, its a never ending job for woman, yes some husbands ar considerate enough to help around. But they will hlep mainly those women who are also working, as incase shes a homemaker, they feel that shes been home all day doing nothing much, so its her job let her deal with it. I speak as i have exeperienced both sides of the coin, though my husband is very considerate and always made sure hed helped me, wether i was at home or working. But this is a sure fact that men will take their woman for granted and not value them as much as they would value their wives who are working. Agreed that its the requirement of the day , that both partners should work now a days, but they must mutually repect and honour each other, even if the wife is a home maker. I think being at home, is a full time job, something that you cannot avoid and you have to work at things to maintain the house and keep it clean always, clean up the mess of the husband, kids, in general. The work is never ending. People look down upon a woman who is a homem aker thinking shes either not that qulaified or not contributing , so she cannto take up and help out inthe house, no t realsiing that shes doing more work sitting at home and managing things for you, so that your life outside and inside the house is comfortable. You ought to respect her for that and not take her for granted.

I must have missed the time the feminists acknowledge being a housewife as a worth while life.As long as I ca remember it was a symbol of men oppressing women.But true freedom means choice. So if your household doesn't need you to work outside the home and you and your husband are happy these other people should mind their own business. Why aren't housewives respected? You mentioned it. People who work outside the home think that it isn't hard work and that housewives are just sitting around eating bon bons and watching t.v. That is so not true.and feminists think that it is demeaning that you are depending on your husband for money.But just because you choose to be home now doesn't mean you couldn't get a job outside if you needed one.So don't let them bother you.Your husband appreciates you. And so of these people may be jealous that you and your husband are well off enough that you don't have to work and they have to work.Take care.

When my hubby and I made the decision to be a one income family it was met with disapprovement. My husband makes enough to keep our bills payed, we are not rich by any means be happy. My inlwas think we are making a huge mistake. They think I am not contributing to the family even though I am raising 2 great kids. I feel like what I do contributes to the future of america. I am raising my family and organizing my home so we are all happier. I know a lot of poeple think I dont have a job but in my home I have the best job on earth.

Hi there .... As for me I have so much respect 4 women and men who realize and who are aware of the housewife value. Well the problem it is the way the media nowadays presenting a woman who is 100% devoted 2 her home, that she has become lesser compared with a working woman. I ain't against working women, I mean, work (excluding money factor) has a positive impact on the person's knowledge and character and so often we see real cool woman who despite being busy at work but never forgot home. But problems arose when people started 2 underestimate the role of a housewife seeing it less important compared with the role as a working person. Being totally devoted 2 work surely has some advantages but on the expense of a mmmm let me say home with a quality, the housewife touch, the inspiration of a female. It would be so great if the woman works and at the same time, doesn't lose track of her home. It is not about cooking and cleaning it is about the atmosphere and the ethics, her presence brings to the family, and kids especially at an early age, need their mom around. ( That doesn't contradict with her working at the same time) In my point-of-view, when a woman wants to work and build a career, it is really important that she keeps a balance between work and home. She may have 2 select a job that doesn't take her away completely from her home and family. By the way, men also have a role at home they must not overlook, they can't just be busy outside and forgetting his kids and wife I mean it is a shared responsibility. Once again, it is the movies, the media depicting a woman who is devoted completely 2 her home as not really cool. Thank you for the interesting post. Excuse typos ....

My viewpoint lands in the middle. I think it's great that you and your husband are happy with you being at home.I also understand it can be frustrating to talk about it with people who aren't in a similar situation. It's frustrating to me that people, often including my husband, seem to think I have lots of time on my hands when I really don't. However, I think there's a back swing with a lot of women deciding they'd rather be at home. You are far from being alone with your setup. A couple Yahoo groups I'm in have few woman that work outside the home. With that point, I think where woman's rights was once glorified, being a SAHM is now glorified. Each couple should figure out what benefits both the most and neither force that upon others nor be forced to conform to what works for others.

I don't know which society you are referring to, but in Indian society housewives are highly respected. They are the leader of the household. Husband earns and wife runs the show at home.

Oh I hear you Nykkee, I can't stand it when my husband comes home and tells me what the stupid people say about women who don't have an outside job..Who do they think they are to judge me or anyone else that chooses to not work outside the home? .

I haven't come across any negativity when asked what I do and I tell them that I'm a housewife. In fact quite the contrary because they say something to the effect "Well that's a big job for you never sit down with all that needs doing and I bet your house is clean, lucky you." But I will say that there are some out there that think all we do is sit around and watch tv. I'd tell them, "Come to my house and see what I do" I bet that would shut them up.

You're right - you have the right to choose the lifestyle that is best for you and your family, and people should respect your decision. You've found what works best for you, and are happy with the decision. It's sounds like you have a good system set up. There are a lot of families that rely on two incomes, or women just choose not to stay home - so the decision to be a housewife is becoming less common. It may simply be that the majority is shifting, so the roll of housewife is being questioned. Or perhaps working families think since they accomplish most of the same tasks as a family with one working and one stay at home partner, that the role isn't that valuable (mind you, it may add a lot more stress with two people working, and leave them with a lot less free time). Also, you mentioned that you don't just sit around and watch tv - but I've heard of many housewives that do exactly that. So those people are also giving a lazy impression to the housewife roll. I personally don't think I could be a stay at home wife, and prefer having mine own career. But this is my personal choice that works for me. To each their own!

The only reason I don't agree with being a "housewife" is because cleaning doesn't take all day. I keep my house clean and I cook dinner every night, and I spend 3-4 quality hours with my husband...all with a 9 hour a day job. I don't have a job for financial independence, I have a job because I enjoy working with others and not being in solitude. I think being a stay at home mom is a full time job, but if you don't have kids, there really isn't THAT much to do at home during the day. Yes it is supposed to be your choice, and if you and your husband are both content with your choice, then I don't seem why it should matter to anyone else. Just don't expect people to consider it a JOB. That's just my POV.

Hello Nykkee! Do not get upset. Don't you know that being a homemaker is the best and professional work in the world? Being a good mom is difficult. Mothers are ideally the care takers of the home. Kids are the most blessed ones esp. if their mothers are the one taking care of them and showing them love. It is the best method that I know, that is, having an ideal household ideals of letting one parent be responsible in the home while the other parent works for a living. It is the only answer we know against having a broken family, juvenile deliquency, and other problems of the society, it starts in the home. As for you, I salute you for you are a responsible homemaker. Try not to focus on such negative issues, rather take a closer look in your home, take care of your kids and your hubby then you will be at peace and have happiness in your heart! Good luck!