Did having kids effect you friendships, and how?
By rachsal4
@rachsal4 (391)
United States
September 14, 2007 4:41pm CST
Before I had my son I was like the Socialite Queen. I had tons of friends, ones that I would hang out with for each thing I liked to do. But after I had my son it seemed to all change, I lost so many friends. Or I should word that different, I figured out that most of them were actually aquaintences. I now really only have two friends, these are the ones that have made it through all my crap.
4 responses
@sephrenia (567)
•
16 Sep 07
I have had the same thing happen too. I had a ton of friends who I hung out with and did random stuff with and to be fair, i enjoyed it.
When I had my kids (I had my first at 17) people were suddenly running away from me! I know I was young but dang! all those people who i thought were friends melted away faster than an icecream in a heatwave.
It took a long time but i now have a circle of friends who accept that im a mother and dont judge me for getting started early. I also seem to be friends with other mothers more than with those who are yet to have kids.
Maybe thats because we can sympathise with each other but still, I know the friends I have now I can count on not to turn their noses up at me and will be there when I need them most.
@marshall_blake2000 (304)
• United States
15 Sep 07
For us to really did effect are friends because we have six kids, and do jnot get out much. Also living out side of town people do not come to see us. So our friends just seemds to for get about us.
@happythoughts (4109)
• United States
14 Sep 07
My social life has slowed way down but I am so much happier with my life now. I love being a mom. My kids are 5 and 2 now so my husband and I are trying to start dating eachother again. It is hard to make the effort when we could just sit home and save money but it has been so fun.
@wotfpatty (2065)
• United States
15 Sep 07
Oh yeah. When I was pregnant with my first son, my best friend since grade school was appalled. She and I went through everything together and were married around the same time and she didn't want kids which was fine with me. But she was so turned off that I wanted them and that I was pregnant, that she didn't even come to my baby shower or come see my baby.
I was very hurt by that and we spoke maybe 10 times since and my son is 21 now so that friendship went belly up.
I had my first son young by choice and my friends were into other things and moved on without me. Only a couple stuck around. I have a few new friends (Well, they were new, not now, they are my old friends now) who either had kids or didn't care that I did.
I have to admit, I was very happy to be with my husband and baby and I didn't really feel the loss of my friends until he got a bit older. Then I had baby number two. It was after they grew up some and I was dying to go out and be social that I realized my friends weren't around and they had moved on. Oh well, I made new friends and I don't regret taking the time to be with my kids at all.
