A plea from the heart - I am standing up for us skinny people!!!
By rosie_123
@rosie_123 (6113)
September 19, 2007 6:03am CST
Ok - everyday here on myLot, and everywhere else in the media, I see the same topic time and time again! Weight! How to lose it! How to keep it off! Or being proud of your excess weight in a world obsessed with thin women!!The world seems to be full of people who are either unhappy with their body weight and want to change it - or, in some cases, are happy with their excess weight, but unhappy with society's perception of them. Well of course I do have sympathy with people in this position - but I also have an axe to grind from the opposite side. OK - don't hate me - but basically - I am slim - very slim - naturally - have been since childhood, - some people may call me thin! As a child I was teased for being a "lamp-post" as I am tall as well, - as a teenager I turned it to my advantage by working as a model where my natural "size zero" type looks always meant I was in demand. Now I'm older I am a little heavier than that as women naturally put on a little weight with age - but I'm still only a British size 8-10 (about US 6-8 I think) and 5ft 8ins - and you know it makes me mad sometimes that people always assume I am either anorexic, bulimic, miserable, or self-obsessed because I don't have rolls of fat oozing over the tops of my skirts! A lot of larger people here seem to look down on us "skinnies" and I think it's unfair! I'm sure I could put on weight If I stuffed my face with cream cakes and greasy junk food all day and never walked anywhere - just the same as larger people could lose weight if they ate less, ate healthier and took more exercise. But the fact is - I don't want to do that because I am happy wth myself and my body and I don't want to change it - in just the same way as some larger people are happy the way they are. Fact is - we are all people and we are all different! Life has room for more than one group or type - so let's live and let live! Anyway - here ends my rant - just please............. next time larger people moan about being looked down on by others for their size, please spare a thought for us slimmer people too and don't look down on us!
12 people like this
23 responses
@ItTakesAllSorts (4096)
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19 Sep 07
What I find sad is that it is always women who have this problem with thiner women. My daughter is naturally slim as she eats properly and stops when she is full, so stays at a consistent weight. I have friends who can eat like a horse and still stay slim. What annoys me is when other women will comment on their weight as they automatically think they are on a diet.
In the media fat people are portrayed as greedy and thin people are portrayed as anorexic, etc. Its amazing how alot of us have been brainwashed into living by fashionable rules. I think nearly everyone in my work is on a diet at some point of the week!!
You are very fortunate Rosie to have maintained a good weight and size, its all the yoyo diets that big women do that make them bigger all the time, so they will assume if someone is thin they have to of reached this by having an eating disorder...madness I know.
I am of an average size but I get comments because I am a vegetarian. Some women will say "Ooh, I thought all vegetarians were skinny" LOL
3 people like this
@ItTakesAllSorts (4096)
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19 Sep 07
I do think it is down to jealousy, I agree with your partner. There is nothing better than looking at a woman who has a great figure. I admire larger women who do not have a problem with their weight. I just wish they would dress to suit their size instead of trying to wear clothes that makes them have bulges everywhere. The introduction of hipster trousers has left me disturbed on many occasions, but then I have a bit of a phobia about bodies, including my own, so I prefer it when people keep covered up. I have a big chest and it really annoys me when women comment on it or men talk to them.
I am glad winter is coming...no more shirtless men and women in belly tops with bingo wings!!LOL
2 people like this
@rosie_123 (6113)
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19 Sep 07
LOL - yes - probably very politically incorrect to say, but I hate it when larger women wear inappropriate clothes too! I have a larger girlfriend who always dresses with class and style, and she looks genuinely gorgeous on every occasion - but then there are others who insist on jeans and skimpy crop tops - ugh! Gross! Oh and welcome t the big chest department!!! And believe me - being skinny but still having a big chest leaves you open to even worse comments from people!
1 person likes this
@devilsangel (1817)
• United States
19 Sep 07
I'm not sure if this is directed at me or not, but I'd like to respond anyway. I have no issues with anyone's size. I know that people varry from really little to really big. I get upset mostly when people try and mandate what the "proper" size should be of a person. Hell my cousin has been small her whole life, we use to mess with her all the time when we were kids. We'd tease and say if she turned sideways we'd lose her. She's naturally a small person, and eats like food is going out of style. Both my kids are fairly thin, so I have no issues with it at all. On a differnt note, eatting less doesn't help you lose weight, it actually slows your matablism down. It is recomended that a person eat 3 meals and 2 healthy snacks a day to keep their matabalism going and their body constantly burning fat. People seem to be under the impression that straving yourself or diets are the healthy way to lose weight when in reality they are not. There are many bigger people who just like smaller ones are naturally that size. I guess like you I get tired of people thinking that just because of my size I'm not healthy.
3 people like this
@rosie_123 (6113)
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19 Sep 07
Hi devilsangel. First - no it isn't directed at you, - though I can't deny that I did read (and respond) to your discussion this moening and I guess that put the subject back in the forefront of my mind again. If anything - it was originally prompted by another discussion here on the same subject that I read a few weeks ago - though I can't for the life remember the actual title or the thread starter right now, and you also see this subject in the newspapers and on TV all the time. I certainly didn't mean to make you feel that I had singles you out, and thanks for responding to this anyway. Of course - it all depends on how you feel as a person, and what you feel most comfortable with. But must admit - I could never eat 3 meals a day - only eat one (in the evening) plus a bowl of fruit with yoghurt for my breakfast. That's what my oparents did, and I guess my body is so used to it now, that I would be physically sick if I tried to eat more! Have a good day!
1 person likes this
@devilsangel (1817)
• United States
19 Sep 07
I know what ya mean about the 3 meals thing. I had to train myself to be able to eat 3 meals a day because skipping meals isn't healthy and it wasn't good for me. Now I eat 3 meals but I do small meals so I still get the nurishment I need but I'm also doing it in a way that I'm able to eat. I'll have like a bowl of cereal or some yogart when I wake up. I'll make a sandwich or something to that nature for lunch and for dinner I'll either cook something or eat another sandwich. Its easy its small and it fills me up lol.
1 person likes this
@lilaclady (28207)
• Australia
19 Sep 07
Oh I know what your talking about, I was so thin when I was young I used to always get told how skinny I was, when I went to work for the telephone company I couldn't become a permanent staff member because I didn't make the seven and half stone which you had to be, mind you there was one lady there that was 25 stone and they thought that was ok...its a funny world...
@rosie_123 (6113)
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19 Sep 07
Yes - I have had that happen to me too, - and I was never allowed to donate blood either because I was considered "too thin"! By the way - completely off-topic, - but I love your cute avatar - lilac is my favourite colour!.
2 people like this
@lilaclady (28207)
• Australia
19 Sep 07
Thank you, I love purple too seems we have a lot in common...:)
1 person likes this
@lecanis (16647)
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
19 Sep 07
I don't get angry at people for being slim unless they complain about being fat. Those are the only ones that bother me... the ones that weigh about half as much as I do and still seem to think they need to lose weight. If you're naturally slim, and you work to maintain that, more power to you! I think all people should be able to be who they are, because like you said, "we are all people and we are all different!"
The only real problem I have with your post is that you said "larger people could lose weight if they ate less, ate healthier and took more exercise." The fact of the matter is, I am what our society considers "fat" even though I once lost so much weight I was in the hospital for malnutrition. No matter how much weight I lose, I can't pull out my bones and make myself a size 0, so it's frustrating when people tell me that if I did things I am already doing I would lose weight. Even when I am at what the doctors declare a "healthy weight" for me, society at large considers me fat.
2 people like this
@rosie_123 (6113)
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19 Sep 07
Well I explained that comment in a reply to another ppster earlier. By no means did I mean to be offensive - but I honestly believe that all people can lose weight if they eat less. Groups like "Weight Watchers" have proved that. I do know what you mean about slim people saying they are fat - a good friend of mine is about the same size as me, but her stomach is a ittle "flabby" after having 3 children quite close together, and becaise of that she has a poor body image, and often describes herself as "fat" when everyone knows she's not at all! Thanks for your contribution.
1 person likes this
@rosie_123 (6113)
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20 Sep 07
I am very sorry for your friend - sounds like a complex medical case, and I hope something can be done to help him.
@sephrenia (567)
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19 Sep 07
hey there!
Believe me, I dont look down on skinny people at all. I know that sometimes women are just naturally skinny and sometimes, us larger women forget you're on the other end receiving just as many stupid remarks as we get.
I just want to clarify something with you though, you seem to have made a couple of generalities in your post such as saying you could put on weight if you stuffed your face or never exercised. Not all overweight people are overweight because of that, In my case its a hormone imbalance since having my kids and try what i might, i cant shift it and believe me, ive tried a lot!
You also say larger people would lose weight if they ate better and exercised more. I know a few overweight ladies who eat as healthy as they can and exercise a ton and while they are in good health, they cant get rid of the weight.
Anyways, im not having a dig at you, thankyou for pointing out that skinny people get stupid remarks too, its something to keep in mind when you wonder if that girl you just passed on the street has an eating disorder.
2 people like this
@rosie_123 (6113)
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19 Sep 07
Thanks so much for your interesting and well-thought reply. I must admit I thought long and hard before inserting the sentence about the cream cakes (I didn't do it lightly!), - but although I know there are some genetic and hereditary issues with larger people (especially to do with the actual bodily shape and frame and bone structure), I tend to firmly believe that if you eat less you do lose weight - it's as simple as that. I know this is a very extreme example, but my Mother was a refugee from Eastern Europe in World War II - most of her family ended up in Concentration Camps, - and believe me, - no one in that kind of environment is overweight! The same as you don't see fat athletes (who exercise a lot and eat healthily), nor fat people in famine-torn countries. I also think a lot of people do "underestimate" what they eat - espeically when it comes to snacks like crisps and chocolate bars! Thanks for your great reply anyway - and - by the way - I read in one of your other discussions that you are a Size 14 - well that isn't fat at all in my opinion - just normal! Have a nice day!
2 people like this
@hadesviking (7)
• India
19 Sep 07
Well, large people do have a lot of weight to throuw around. I belong to the skinny group too and wish I had a bit more load to carry around. But we "skinny" people are really well off you know.
2 people like this
@rosie_123 (6113)
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19 Sep 07
Well I know we are far healthier in terms of blood pressure etc - and that can only be good! Thanks for responding.
1 person likes this
@rosie_123 (6113)
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23 Sep 07
Those are very wise words my friend. If more people thought like you, the world would be a nicer place:-))
1 person likes this
@biggerb (2024)
• India
20 Sep 07
Hi!rosie_123
I very well understand your problem as i have a sister who is also very skinny.She has been asked to get her self tested for a number of problems which luckily all turned out negative.Doctors do keep assuring her that she is in perfect health.She has tried everything possible to put on weight but never succeeded.What really annoys her is when people start raising doubts about her health or pass comments about her being very figure conscious which really irritates her. I wish people will stop making comments whether the person is fat or thin.Reading the other responses i found even the over weight have other problems which the others will not know.Its best for people to reseve their comments than to hurt anyone.
1 person likes this
@LittleMel (8742)
• Canada
4 Oct 07
I see that you live in england. My husband is English and I'm used to hear his relatives or friends visiting from there, saying that I need to eat or something similar. Then I met an American who always talks about diet and he actually carries a diet calculator to work, this is mostly what he talks about. but in my case, no matter how skinny and petite I am, they don't call me anorexic. I don't know why, maybe because they are used to see Asians smaller than them. I guess if they call me anorexic I will tell them they suffer a serious case of uneven distribution, they should grow more vertical than horizontal. anyway thanks for standing up for skinny people
@sunnywaters (189)
• United States
20 Sep 07
I am a slender woman and enjoy it immensely. Do not have to buy baggy clothes to hide my fat, do not need to eat myself out of a depression and just like who I am. I also do not care a bit about what others think of my body weight.
sunnywaters
1 person likes this
@nmhschic2004 (1238)
• United States
20 Sep 07
Rosie im sorry to hear you have to put up with this nonsense. When i younger i heard the remarks "skinny as a broom handle." And they did get old. You shouldnt have to justify the way you look. If you like the way you look then good for you. Dont change anything about yourself. I have a cousin thats very small and the poor thing gets grief all the time because of her weight. Most people thing overweight people are the only ones made fun of. But this is not true. I have seen it so much for slim people.
1 person likes this
@rosie_123 (6113)
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20 Sep 07
Well I guess it is because slim people are in the minority in the Western World. Far too many people eat the wrong food and lead sedentary lifestyles. Funny how you don't see any obese paople in famine torn Africa isn't it!?
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
20 Sep 07
I know just where you're coming from rosie because in my younger days, I was a rail because I was so skinny. No matter what I ate I couldn't gain any weight. Everybody hated that I was so skinny but I couldn't help it. When I got married I was so skinny that I was a size one and I was white as a ghost because of my skin disease that I couldn't get in the sun I felt that no one would see me walking down the isle but instead my beautiful white gown and a ghost! LOL I'm 5'5" and being that tiny just didn't fit my body but what can a person do, right? Now I've gained a lot of weight thanks to the meds I have to take and having a hysterectomy didn't help matters any either and now I feel that I'm huge. I'm probably not as big as I think I am but gosh I sure feel like I am but you know what? I am what I am and that's that. I'm not going to change it to suit someone else. I am who I am and that's that.
1 person likes this
@rosie_123 (6113)
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20 Sep 07
I love that last comment "I am who I am and that's that!" Very wise wiords, and thanks for them!
@violeta_va (4831)
• Australia
20 Sep 07
It is a fair argument you have here but let me tell you that we (larger people) have it worse than skin people. We are constantly bombarded by adds and media on how to be aperfect size this how to loose so many kg in so many weeks, how to buy this product or machine or book to help us loose weight. How many of this things have you seen latly and how many have you seen on gow to gain weight. most of the clothes made todat are for skinny people larger size people dont have many choices. When I was growing up I was always told I was fat I was 156cm and 46kg and that was fat to many people. As much as skinny people can be happy in their own body larger people can be happy too. And no I do not look down on anyone I dont care how skinny or fat a person is.
1 person likes this
@rosie_123 (6113)
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20 Sep 07
Well as long as you are happy with your weight and your appearance, it really doesn't matter what other people think. Thanks for responding here.
@moxalot (100)
• United States
20 Sep 07
Oh my gosh....
Thank you for your rant. Because I feel the same way. I'm the same way.
The heaviest I've ever been was when I was pregnant. And then dropped the weight really fast.
People I know have always wondered if I was anorexic, etc... No just a super fast metabolism. I could eat a pint of ice cream no problem. I don't do that anymore, but I did in college. But all my roommates and housemates were always complaining about being fat... They weren't fat at all. It drove me crazy.
I'm glad there are other people out there that feel the same way...
1 person likes this
@rosie_123 (6113)
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20 Sep 07
LOL - yes - the heaviest my Mother ever weighed was on the day I was born, and she was so slim she was back into jeans within a week of my birth! I am just like she was and sounds like you are too! Thanks for responding.
@Calais (10893)
• Australia
19 Sep 07
OMG !!!! I am hearing you...I am sick of hearing about obese this and that, what about us also...I am a stick and quite often get called annorexic myself..I have to shop for clothes in the kids sections...I have a battlr just as much as the bigger people..I eat whatever I like and never put on any weight..Its natural and I have always been like that..Why should we be put down because of our figures ???
1 person likes this
@rosie_123 (6113)
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19 Sep 07
Yes it is hard I know. I guess the only "bright side" is that kids' section clothes are cheaper! Sadly as I am tall and stil quite large on top - I can't even buy those:-(( Thanks for your reply.
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
19 Sep 07
I love this rant as you call it. What I take from all the comparatives you make here is the importance of being the best 'YOU' rather than trying to force the body into some idealized image of social acceptance.
Learning to love the body we have is the first step to making it the best it can be. No one has developed the power to transform their basic biology into something other than it is. I am 5' 1/2 inches with a medium to small frame. I developed two eating disorders when I was younger when I was modeling and realized I could never have the height and size you and and other models had.
So I starved myself down to a skinny 89 pounds. When I finally woke up to the fact that I wanted to be healthy, happy and whole more than I wanted to be skinny my life went in a whole new direction.
Comparisons to others always leads to discontent. I like your approach...why not set a trend where everyone commits to making the body they have the healthiest, strongest biology that it can be. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder..and if we work on feeling beautiful from the inside out...it will beam beyond the skinniest...or heaviest of bodies. As we love and respect ourselves from the inside out...we are more inclined to be comfortable in our own skins and that will stop the put-downs and negative comparisons towards others.
Good discussion Rosie...we need to put more of this type of thinking out there.
Cheers my good friend..
Raia
@spiderlizard22 (3444)
• United States
19 Sep 07
I totally agree. At least with a skinny person I wouldn't have to worry about them crushing me.
1 person likes this
@rosie_123 (6113)
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19 Sep 07
LOL! Well that is one way of looking at it I guess! Thanks for making me smile:-))
@rosie_123 (6113)
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19 Sep 07
Well that is good to hear - a man of eclectic tsstes! Thanks for responding.
@thefortunes (2367)
• Netherlands
19 Sep 07
Hi Rosie, I can't believe it that there are people who would look down on smart (thin) people as yourself ;) And I am sure that they are simply jealous, and invidious too for not being able to be like you and with your body my dear ;) But I can definitely imagine how bad this is making you feel, and I really feel bad about it for you. You should just laugh at such comments, and the people who look down on you - look down on them also ;)
In my case, I am the average not thick and not thin, and as high as you are, but size 12-14 I think, or the EU 40-42.
And I have a very slim but also tiny GF who is calling me very, very fat behind my back, as for her everyone with a normal body is just fat! You have no idea how much this is pissing me off, as I , just like you feel happy and content he way I am, and if someone has anything to say, than say it in my face and not behnd my back, right?
In any case my dear friend, I understand very well your problem and feel for you, really I do. Have agreat day!
TheFortunes
1 person likes this
@rosie_123 (6113)
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19 Sep 07
Hi sweetie! Yes I can understand how that would piss you off! LOL! And - don't worry - I don't take such things to heart at all - maybe whe I was 15 or 16, but now do as you say and laugh it off! Thanks for responding!
@ailema4ever (2668)
• Finland
19 Sep 07
WOW!!! Very passionate post!
I have two skinny friends but I never thought of them as bulimic or miserable. They just have a very good metabolism. I know one of them is constantly trying SO hard to gain weight. Now she's pregnant and she's SO happy 'coz she has gained 10 kilos. She's never been this heavy and she's thrilled! I'm happy for her, too!
I hope that you feel better after writing down this post and getting responses from other people. ;-D
