How to deal with 12 year olds!
@american_jewels (7)
September 19, 2007 5:14pm CST
My son just turned 12. He had alreadyy started acting like a turd becuase of all the different kids he got to hang out with during the summer. But now he is changing a little. I can tell he is hitting a spot where he is changing, but he trys to act like an adult!
3 people like this
4 responses
@bizmom (515)
• United States
19 Sep 07
Welcome to pre teens!!
and nowadays its TEENS
well when mine ( girl) turned 12 she started with being mouthy from seeing her friends behave that way - so what we did was keep a tight hold of our rules - if nOT TIGHTER!! lol
she was grounded for any mouth she gave RIGHT AWAY!!
reminded that WE ARE NOT them!! and neither was she!
what we realized in this was she wanted more *freedom*
we explained that with the freedoms came responsibilities
so we tested her to see what she could handle and so on -
( little does she know we are still testing her) lol
I actually remember being 12 that wierd age where ur too young for this -- and too old for that! :(
we started with letting her go with her friends to a movie - we drove one way other parents would do other - OR we woudl do both! :)XX she did well actualy called to ask if we could bring home a friend as well
and from there giving her more and more - sort of letting go - but not completely of course :)XX
it just seemed she was trying to *break out* of the *baby* mold
they try to be *adult* to try to PROVE they are - well text it!
allow him to do thing that maybe he year before he couldnt - if i was lets say not able to ride his bike off he long block or something ( just an example) let him ride around the block coming right back!
*letting go* a little at a time!
Im sure u can trust him and just like with the law - **trust until PROVEN untrustworthy!** lol
GOOD LUCK!!
@american_jewels (7)
•
20 Sep 07
Yes my son is getting very mouthy, but he says he's just joking everytime. I have started letting him things that I normally wouldn't. My husband says to give him a leash and let him us it. I let him ride his bike to the store which is a couple of blocks away. And there are a couple kids that live on the next block over and i have been letting him go play there. It is hard for his little sister who is only 7 bevause he gets to do things she can't. And it is hard for her to understand because she feels like she is as old as him I think!
@bizmom (515)
• United States
20 Sep 07
OH YEAH!!
thats then seeing how farthey can stretch thier *new found mouth* lol
we have let afew things slide - something are a *growing up right* others well.. a privelage!
I have that problem with my two as well even being just two years apart its hard as a mom/Dad to NOT be *two faced* letting one do something but not the other even when they are same age -
reason being for instance mine older is a *brick sh** house!! could knock ur block off a mile away! - Very pretty if i say so myself lol - i dont worry too much with her if someone tryed to take her they wouldnt be able to lift her muchless gat away with it with her mouth!!
but younger shes more than half her size not as strong and well shes my *looking at life through rose colored glasses* type ( which i really do love!!) but its not realistic andi worry alot more with her - its so hard to treat them equal and yet keep them safe!!! (which i DO treat equaling other areas)
what i did with my younger one is give a bit more to her as well like able to sleep over friends houses, maybe going to a movie but with u a few rows back! lol
having a friend over something that makes her thing shes getting some ( attention) and her own *leash* tooso to speak!
I think what ur hubby means is giving them a leash and if they trip on it well ... pull it in a bit each time they mess up!
( if im reading that bit right)
like rope! sooner or later they will *hang themselves with it* as the saying goes - lol
then they just have to start over with proving themselves lol
GOOD LUCK!!
xx
1 person likes this
@msjigga (864)
• United States
19 Sep 07
Hi american jewels! I remember being 12 that is such a hard year. Twelve was the hardest year because I was too old for alot of things and still too young to do alot of things. That was the year where I was just startign to find myself and identify and trying to belong. I would recommend if your 12 year pre teen is getting involved with possibly the wrong type of kids encouraging your kid to get into a sport, or an extra ciricular activity like an insturment or martial arts. So that he can identify himself with an activity or hobby instead of looking to people for acceptance.
1 person likes this
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
19 Sep 07
Hi american_jewels, Your son in entering a time in life that most people find very difficult. He will need all the love and understanding that you can give him. You may need a lot of patience too, but always let him know that you care. Blessings.
1 person likes this
@libertarianfreedom21 (3198)
• United States
12 Mar 08
I think you should come back on this website and vent somemore lol, im about to make my first payout at 12$ i know it aint much but its a place to vent and get paid for it.
