What Would You Do if Your Friend Gets Mad Because

Hong Kong
October 6, 2007 1:29am CST
you told her the honest words from your heart? Remember I said I had a good friend and her boyfriend owes USD52,000 to the bank due to his gambling habits. These days, I can't help but wonder if she would get mad when I tell her how I truly feel about the incident. What would you do if your friend gets mad at you after you have told him/ her your honest feelings on a situation?
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15 responses
@laurika (4532)
• United States
6 Oct 07
I would just wait till she ger over it and she will soon, believe me, she cannot be blind forever.Also I would tell her truth sensitive and show her, I am there for here all the time, she would need me.I read that your discussion before and I am glad, it is not easy for her either, but she should face it and probably her good friend would be the best way hot to show her truth.Don't worry, maybe she would get mad, but not for long.If she is smart, she would realize soon who is right.
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• Hong Kong
6 Oct 07
Yes only if she is smart *smiles*.
• China
6 Oct 07
I thought she would understand you finally.Its only a question of time.Maybe she was mad at the begining,since there is an old saying 'love is blind'.But when she calmed down,it seemed very clear that you were right.Since you are very close friends,I suppose you have similar ideas towards love and life.Perhaps it takes her some time to think over.Dont worry,be happy.
• Hong Kong
6 Oct 07
Yes, maybe! Thanks for your words!
@youless (112496)
• Guangzhou, China
12 Oct 07
I think you haven't done anything wrong. You will say the true words because she is your good friend. If she doesn't listen to it, it's up to her. Even she is mad to you because of it, it is her fault. You have already done it right to your friend. Don't feel bad even if she is mad to you. One day she will realize you are right.
• Hong Kong
14 Oct 07
Yes the only important thing is to fulfill a friend's responsibility and if I am a good friend, I should say my analysis based on the real facts.
@gmakesmoney (2923)
• United States
6 Oct 07
When it comes to relationships, nobody wants to hear bad things or realize them about their partner. One because they believe they are in love and two because nobody wants to admit that they've made a bad choice. I've had friends with bad boyfriends who have gotten upset when I've mentioned it and I've been the friend with the bad boyfriend who didn't want to realize it. It's hard situation, just follow your instincts.
• Hong Kong
6 Oct 07
Well, I hate this. I would just ignore the whole thing for awhile as I am going away anyway. It's just too disappointing if my friend is choosing over that dump a**.
• United States
8 Oct 07
I agree, it can be a hard situation to be in on either side.
• Philippines
6 Oct 07
i would not feel guilty,its realy up to her, what is important is i did my part as a friend to her..giving her advise and possibilities.anyway i dont think she will get mad if she treated you and know you as her bestfriend.you can tell her in a nice way.
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• United States
12 Oct 07
Apologize for butting into her business. Most people will ask you if they want your opinion. I find that you are usually safe if you don't offer your opinion on things unless you are asked to.
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• Hong Kong
14 Oct 07
*laughs* I don't unless they ask me to! Most of the time, I don't want to get involved in other people's business.
@wisedragon (2325)
• Philippines
6 Oct 07
If she's a true friend she should at least listen to you. She doesn't need to do what you tell her to do, but at least let you express how you feel. Now if she wants to learn her lessons the hard way, I say let her be! She'll wake up to the truth one day.
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@meemingNEW (2226)
• Philippines
6 Oct 07
Yeah. I do remember about your friend and her boyfriend who owes her money because he used your friend's credit card or was it cold cash for gambling?. I don't think it's appropriate for you to say what you really feel to her in her situation now. I mean, her boyfriend didn't returned or paid her money yet .. and maybe she has lots of problems and stuff. I suggest that instead of telling your friend about what you really feel, You just have to comfort her. Be with her and be a friend. A friend who will lend her a helping hand and a shoulder to cry on.. And if ever she'll be okay and her situation with her boyfriend will become better, I think that's the time to tell her what you really feel. Best of luck!
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• Hong Kong
6 Oct 07
Right, I might do the comforting if she mentions anything again. Meanwhile, I am on laisse-faire policy *smiles*. I won't initiate to ask her about anything like that, I regard that as her own private matter. But if she says something, I am prepared to have a reaction *laughs*.
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
9 Oct 07
I have had friends become angry with me for speaking the truth, but it is not out of anger towards me, but anger towards themselves directed at you for telling them what they already know. Just give your friend time to absorb the information and really think on it. At the end of the conversation just let her know if she is angry that you are always her friend and always there for her and when she feels ready to talk to you, then you will be there then let it rest.
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• Hong Kong
14 Oct 07
Thanks for the piece of good advice! Yea, I guess that's the only thing I could do! I definitely don't want to see her fall, but I am sure I will grab her when she needs me to!
@jaydee08 (50)
• Philippines
6 Oct 07
If ever that happened to me, well I would definitely wonder why my friend got mad on me when in fact I was just bein' honest. If you are a true friend, you never pretend and you always tell the truth to that friend and vice versa. But of course, i don't wanna be one-sided. Question: In what particular manner did you tell how you felt about the said incident? Maybe she just misinterpreted it that's why she got mad at you. You have to communicate with her for you guys to patch things up.:)
• Hong Kong
6 Oct 07
I haven't told her yet as I felt that she didn't want any opinions or words. But if she brings that up again, I would say something, at least what's on my mind. Like you said, I have always been a loyal friend to my friends and if I say something, that means I can. Why waste my energy if I don't care a bit. Thanks for the idea, I might tune up my voice if I really have to say something.
@drannhh (15219)
• United States
6 Oct 07
If she is still with that guy, then this is the kind of situation where you have little choice. Unless you really think she is capable of walking away from the user-man she has hooked up with, if I were in your shoes, I would use them to walk right out of her life. The story sounds a bit fishy anyway, because what kind of bank loans money for gambling? It would appear that the money may have been borrowed under false pretenses and it sounds to me like your friend is in serious trouble. I'm pretty sure she is not telling you everything. She may be an innocent victim, but you have to consider other possibilities as well. I wouldn't worry about her getting mad or not. You need to protect yourself from even the appearance of being involved with people who might well be engaging in criminal activity.
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• Hong Kong
6 Oct 07
Yes I am sure she is not telling me everything too because I am usually the one who yells at the top of my lung when I hear something that "silly". Anyway, she is still with the man. And I am not saying anything. I kind of think if I should when she mentioned it next time but I know she would be mad! Well, thanks for your care! I will be using my shoes to walk away from them (at least for a couple months). I somehow love the simplicity (as simple as I try to maintain) of my life and I don't want any complication!
@marinarovi (1318)
• Argentina
12 Oct 07
Even if she gets mad, I'd feel much better having told her the truth. And if she's a good friend and a reasonable person, sooner or later she'll be thankful, even if she gets mad at first. don't be too harsh on him, though, just keep to the facts! Good luck!
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8 Oct 07
LOL I got so mad and was finally honest with my wife and told her what I thought, suspected and believed about her. And that was the end of that. Regrets? Yes. I truly wish she had not caused herself so much pain, but one cannot live your life base on illusions, mis-perceptions and self-delusions. That I hadn't lost my self control and phrased somethings to hurt more than to teach.
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• Hong Kong
14 Oct 07
I agree that one cannot live a life based on false illusions. At least you was honest with your wife!
@madcrowd (79)
• China
6 Oct 07
It is your responsibility to tell her what you thougth about her as a friend,but it is her business that what she thought about things you told her.You have told you feeling,that is right,your responsibility is finished.Don't always mention it to your friend about this thing.She needs times to realize the truth.If she thinks you try to destroy the friendship between her and her boyfriend,leave her.Get ready to help her whenever she is hurt.
• Hong Kong
6 Oct 07
Oh actually that's just a situational question, I haven't even mentioned anything *laughs*.
• India
6 Oct 07
Honesty is the best policy and this is what we have been told since childhood but fact of the day is that be restricted to yourself and do not interfere in anyones private life. Everyone needs space in their relationship along with freedom to decide what is right and what is wrong
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