my friend will give birth soon but she doesnt have baby stuff yet!
By jHoEn16
@jHoEn16 (2043)
Australia
October 6, 2007 10:29am CST
i recieved a text message from my friend jane yesterday telling me that our other friend name jo was pregnant and might give birth soon but she doesnt have any baby stuff yet just because they dont have money... jane was asking for my son old infant clothes.. if there are some thats left.. because she wants to let jo borrow it... i want to but i dont have anything thats left since i gave it already to my other friends...
i just feel sorry for my friend and sometimes wonder why she didnt even start to buy baby stuff slowly just before her due date? (when her husband was working on that time)and now they dont have money because her husband dont have a job anymore... and her parents dont want to help her because they dont like her husband... :(
how about you pal? how old was your tummy when you start buying some stuff for your baby? does your parent help you? who is with you when you buy that?
me, my tummy was only 6 months when i started buying some baby stuff.. everytime i have money ill make sure that i bought one thing for my baby until i complete it before my due date... i am not with my parents or in my relatives that time.. so it was my friends who helped me..
3 people like this
18 responses
@noriko (1254)
•
7 Oct 07
we, me and my hubby bought things for our baby when i was 5 month pregnant. but we bought one item at time because we are saving also at the same time for the hospital expences. i think parents to be should be responsible enough to prepare as soon a possible. having a child is not that easy so you need to plan it specially financially. you are right there that they should start buying clothes and stuffs for the child earlier. now that there is no more enough time and as you said they have no money is much hard to think were to get the things their child needs.
@noriko (1254)
•
8 Oct 07
you said you cant resist your friend because she has no parents already, what does parents has to do with this? i mean she has her husband and having children is a shouldered burden between husband and wife not us and our parents. thats the reason why most of the couples dont get matured, coz they think there are always people they can count on. i know what you feel right now that you pity them but you have your own problems to deal wuth. they should start being responsible on the day they first knew that they are going to have a baby.
@jHoEn16 (2043)
• Australia
7 Oct 07
me too, i am buying one item at a time... i have 2 friends that 1 month ahead pregnant before me... and if you will ask about money situation i could say that im on top since i have a foreigner husband... i could buy all the baby stuff a week before my due but i didnt do it... because i dont know what will happened?,, what if he will lost his job just before my due then how can i buy those things? did you get my point pal?
i have to be prapared... i dont want to be yell by my doctor just because i dont have a complete stuff... i mean i have money than them but i still think of being practical.. how much more them?
thats what i always told them.. you are pregnant now and your husband job is not permanent.. so now that he has job try to buy one stuff every salary dont wait for your due you will never know what will happened tomorrow... they didnt listen so what happened is like that... i have to bring my friend to the hospital on my situation i am 8 months pregnant that time and the doctor dont want me to be tired since i am bleeding and mind you pal we are riding a trisycle and i am at the back of the driver :) i bought some important stuff for the baby and bring some of my baby and give it to her... that night was raining and i have to go home alone..:(
i cant resist my friend coz she doesnt have parents already and her inlaws didnt do anything! she was lucky i am there... and now its happening again..i am not there... i just wish that my other friends would help her...
@artemis432 (7474)
• Abernathy, Texas
9 Oct 07
I have a ten month old and he's my first. My husband and I procrastinated. We didn't have a shower and my mom is 73 - and we help her out with money. He has lotsov toys though and clothes. Most of his clothes are big on him - more economical that way - will last longer. We just roll up his sleeves and such.
@artemis432 (7474)
• Abernathy, Texas
9 Oct 07
Well if it wern't for some neighbors with an almost three year old we wouldn't have been so lucky! Babies grow out of clothes so quickly that all of the baby clothes they gave us were like new. The toys were in great shape too. And of course we'll pass the toys and clothes on to others. I don't think he's lucky because he has toys and clothes but because he has parents who love him.
@LadyDulce (830)
• United States
7 Oct 07
I didn't get most of my baby stuff until after my son was born. Most of the baby things in my family have been passed around and will continue to be passed on, along with the stories they hold. It's how we pass along our history and our stories and anecdotes about our children. I like our traditions, but that's how we stay strong and grounded.
Blessed Be
@jHoEn16 (2043)
• Australia
7 Oct 07
oh same as in my family... did you know that when i was in manila half of my sons clothes was from my two brothers? i was really amaze to know that my mum have kept it for that long... my older bro was 12 now and the younger was 5.. and that clothes was being hand to the other member of the family since my son is growing up now and we migrate already...
thanks for sharing pal :)
@HighReed1 (1126)
• United States
13 Oct 07
I'm not sure of the resources in your friend's area. Sometimes there are churches that have Clothes Closets where the clothes are free.
Is this her first one? If so, and she hasn't had a baby shower yet, maybe her friends could get together and get her some stuff. It doesn't have to cost a fortune, just be usable.
When I had my first, I was young and stupid. I got nothing for the baby. I just didn't have a clue. My parents got all the stuff for me. I wasn't working, so I couldn't get it myself.
@jHoEn16 (2043)
• Australia
17 Oct 07
yes, its her first time and she cant walked now coz she wasnt that normal... her left foot was too small... i dont think so if my friends can give her a baby shower but i have told them where to go to asked help... for the old clothes... i gave them some numbers and sddress of my other friends... so hope they will do the rest
@Dee351972 (743)
•
11 Oct 07
yes i agree they should of started when they found out. But i do know it is hard when you low income. I cant rember when i started since it been so long but i lnow it was before i was due. I hope she can get stuff for the baby, they are so much joy and i know it makes it harder to enjoy when u dont have money. but i have been there and i have fiqured it out. Maybe you can help a little with something that she needs for the baby, what ever you co uld afford. Also have anyone thought of throwing her a baby shower? that will help get stuff.
@foxygirle (376)
• Philippines
11 Oct 07
your news saddens me to hear that your friend is pregnant and her husnabd has no job, poor baby but i do hope they will find away to resolve their problems.
i think i started buying baby stuff when i was four months old, few things at a time, though i also have to buy some maternity stuff for myself. Being pregnant is hard since you need bigger clothes to fit in and sometimes its also expensive buying those stuff for yourself and also buying stuff for the baby.
also its hard getting baby stuff while your still less than 6 months since you still have to consider the size of your baby, so the best is to get the bigger sizes since baby grow so fast also.
baby stuff do cost a lot, if there are friends willing to pass on old baby stuff it will really help your friend to get through the first year of her baby without spending too much.
@jHoEn16 (2043)
• Australia
13 Oct 07
i hope they will solve thier problems too...
i agree pal, buying stuff for us during pregnancy was expensive too... i remember before.. i booght my preg clothes one at a time... and i have 6 pieces of it since i didnt go out coz i am in bed rest... plus the vitamins fruits and milk and other stuff... thats why i decide to buy my baby stuff one at a time too... i choose the unisex...
@nmw2005 (1197)
• United States
7 Oct 07
I was probably about 7 months when we started buying stuff. Plus I was already startng to cut coupons for baby products, wait for them to go on sale to get an even better price.
Has your friend check out consignment shops or thrift stores? You can get some really good buys there for clothing and other baby items she might need.
@maddysmommy (16230)
• United States
7 Oct 07
My sister had already three children before I had my first so I mainly had her childrens hand me down clothing which were in very good condition. I did buy new cloth nappies and clothes, portable cot as we were living in Samoa at the time, my inlaws bought the buggy and a few things. So I pretty much had everything before I gave birth (well what I thought we needed before giving birth).
@gradyslady (4054)
• United States
9 Oct 07
Wow, that's kind of shocking she doesn't have the stuff yet. Everyone I know that has kids ran out right away and got stuff so they would have it all by the time the baby came. I hope she gets all that stuff in time. And tell her congrats!
@izathewzia (5134)
• Philippines
7 Oct 07
That's very sad to hear. The first thing a woman should have before giving birth is to have baby things. It is necessary so the baby will have something to use. Even second hand from close friends and relatives will do. Just don't let it as in nothing at all.
@jHoEn16 (2043)
• Australia
7 Oct 07
my sons infant clothes was now on my 2 friends who give birth just a few months after me and the other was on my relatives and the other was on my aunts neighborhood friend... i have told my friend jane to talked to our friend carol and vangie if they are still using those clothes that i gave, if not then asked it for jo...
i dont want her to give birth without anything...
@leah_ramirez (35)
• Philippines
7 Oct 07
my mom is a big help. i started buying baby stuff 3 months before my due date.
@jiangli (363)
• China
7 Oct 07
I am a gentleman!I am very sorry for hearing that thing!
It's unthinkable that jo's parents can stand for not helping her!In china ,The olds always hope for grandchild,the more,the better!In most time ,the young couple wound't like to have a baby!but the olds are extremely anxious!so it's not surprising grandparents wound get ready to buy all baby stuff once the mother is pregnant.most children wound be enjoy their cubhood with grandparents instead of parents
@liumingqiang (25)
• China
7 Oct 07
i think you must tell your freied that ,you are wrong ,if you don't leave the name ,your baby nama will not be void. tha's wall.
@SlapItHigh (172)
• United States
7 Oct 07
I didn't really buy anything beforehand. I didn't see it as necessary. I had a few hand me down gowns to put the baby in but I mostly planned to wear him on chest, skin to skin so he didn't need much clothing. We had plenty of money but I didn't see the need to buy anything beforehand.
@jHoEn16 (2043)
• Australia
7 Oct 07
in manila especially in a government hospital they will ask for a baby nappies clothes and other things and if the patient cant provide that some doctors will get angry... and if they didnt earn money for the cloths how much more when she give birth? i wish they can do something about it..
thanks pal for sharing
@mmiller26 (1930)
• Canada
6 Oct 07
When I was pregnant, I didn't have much money either. I shopped at Goodwill and purchased a lot of what I needed there. I also shopped the garage sales and did Freecycling. You'd be surprised at what you can get for very little. It doesn't have to be designer stuff or new stuff.
Have you guys thought about giving her a baby shower? That seems to be traditionally the way a new mother obtains things that are needed for a newborn.
And as for her parents...disliking her husband is one thing. That happens a lot. But now there's a child in the picture, so they need to just get over it. If they want to be around their grandchild, they're going to have to be around the husband too, I assume.
The most important items she's going to need are clothes in a variety of sizes, because they grow fast. She'll need blankets, bottles (if she's not nursing), a crib, a stroller and lots of diapers. And her husband needs to find a job, quickly. Babies are really expensive.
@jHoEn16 (2043)
• Australia
7 Oct 07
in the philippines the people who do that baby shower was those celebrity and rich people... but in her case.. they cant be bother coz most of her friends have nothing too...
i was just wondering why her husband didnt force himself to look for a job when he knows that jo was nelly due.. and i bet they can even but that stuff you have mentioned.. i just wish my other friends can do something for this... but i have talked to jane and give her some numbers of my friends where she can asked help
thanks pal for sharing
@jcyap888 (721)
• Philippines
7 Oct 07
we do planned our baby and buying baby stuffed too! before and after that whether its a boy or girl we bought unisex item. about the case of your friend jo, she maybe dont intended that forget to buy clothes for her coming baby, maybe they dont have enough money, well i think you just have them. like me i have gave ll baby item to our friends too the stroller the cribs too we know were not going to have a baby again.
@jHoEn16 (2043)
• Australia
7 Oct 07
you know the problem with her was she didnt think of what will happened tomorrow.. maybe that time her husband was working everytime that they have money she will say this... ahhh we can but it when my tummy is 7 months already and then boom! they didnt know think that her husband job is not permanent..
@jennwhite07 (130)
• United States
7 Oct 07
I started buying little things for my babies in my 3rd month. It is really best to buy like the baby rags, small toys,car seats, cribs, swings, basically just things not gender oriented before you hit your 3rd trimester. Then once you hit your 3rd trimester you should really focus on clothing, and things of that nature suitable for the babies gender and the time of the year. I wish her the best of luck, having a baby is one of the most special times in a womans life, and I bet dollars to doughnuts that once she has that baby, whether they like her husband or not, they will make sure that baby has what it needs. They are going to be the grandparents, and I would hope they would not fail an innocent child out of their own stubborness
