Discuss family problems with the children

I have always included the children in decision making...that doesnt mean I always do what they want by any means but they know their opinion is important and its always included...I've been that way with them since they were very little...Does it help in bonding with them...I think so, I think my kids really appreciate the fact that I see them as ppl rather than property and i care about and want to know what they think/feel etc rather than rule them ya know....

My sons are older - 21 and 17 - and are always involved in all matters that involve our family. They often have as much say in many matters as we do (vacation spots, buying decisions, etc.) If my younger son comes home later than expected or whatever and I feel the need to punish him (which happens about once a year if that. He's a really great kid and checks in all the time.), we sit down and talk about it and all decide together whether he should spend a week away from his friends or whatever. If he has a good explanation, then we will let it go and warn him. I would never just bark out a punishment without talking to him first. But like I said, my kids are adults or almost adults so it isn't quite the same as those with younger kids. I did always discuss things with the kids though and it was a bonding experience for us. Maybe that is why we are so close now.

I like to discuss certain things with my 3 year old. It makes her feel important. I dont discuss any problems or ask her advice on that. Today I took her to the store and asked her to help me choose a Halloween costume for her sister and tell me what she thought. It makes a child feel like the parent really listens to them and values their opinion. They can't make any big decisions and not to put a burden on them.....