Torn Between Two Lovers
By shameh1202
@shameh1202 (610)
Philippines
10 responses
@lecanis (16647)
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
10 Oct 07
Neither. I've heard this question many times before, the whole "person who loves you or person you love" thing, and I don't get it. It's unfair to both partners to be in uneven relationships like that. If you have someone who doesn't love you but is willing to be with you, then you're keeping them from being with someone they actually could love. If you have someone whom you don't love but are willing to be with, then you're being unfair to them because most likely they know you don't love them, and that HURTS. You're also cheating yourself in that situation because you're keeping from finding someone you could love.
If you have two lovers, and you're not in an equally "loving" relationship with either of them, drop them both and find someone you could really be happy with. Otherwise, you're just causing harm to everyone involved.
1 person likes this
@shameh1202 (610)
• Philippines
11 Oct 07
Yes, because life is never fair especially in love. We can't really control everything. That is reality, so sad but true:-(
1 person likes this
@lecanis (16647)
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
11 Oct 07
*nods* If you hadn't noticed from my response, I've had experience both being the partner who wasn't really in love but wanted to make the other happy, and being the partner who was in love with someone who wasn't in love with me. Either way hurts.
1 person likes this
@arikahs (1)
•
27 Mar 08
Hello shameh1202! If I were in that situation, I would rather choose the one I love. I know that it is always better to have someone you love and someone who loves you too. But if ever I just can't have both, I would rather have that someone I love. I am very much willing to sacrifice just for the sake of my love to him. And I will do my very best to make him love me too in the future. Who knows?? Because I believe that love works in mysterious ways. Have a great day!
@shameh1202 (610)
• Philippines
27 Mar 08
Hi there arikahs! I agree with you that it is always better to have someone we love and at the same time someone who loves us. Yet as they say life is never fair. We may meet someone along the way and fall for that person yet wouldn't feel the same way we do for them. That is indeed very inevitable. We may have different thoughts in choosing someone to be with. Because I would still prefer to be with someone who loves me than the one I love because I've been hurt before in doing such thing. I chose to be with the one I love yet he just can't love me back the way I do to him. So I would rather be with the one who loves me because there is a very big tendency of me falling for that man. But I do respect your opinion. If you are happy with it, then let it be. Cheers!
@spoiled311 (5500)
• Philippines
15 Jan 08
hi shameh!
i really wouldn't know. i wouldn't choose if i don't have to, but for the sake of argument, i think i will choose the one who loves me. i know that person will not be hard to love and i will not find it hard to love him because i know he will do everything for me to love him..
hope that satisfies your curiosity. tahnks and God bless! :-)
@shameh1202 (610)
• Philippines
21 Jan 08
Hey there spoiled311!
Thank you so much for sharing your thought about this matter. Me too, I don't wan to choose any of the two. But I guess, there are really some instances wherein we really need to aside from the purpose of argument. I do agree with you that it would actually be better to choose the person who loves us. I know it may be a bit unfair yet somehow, there is always a big chance of loving someone who cares for us so much. They are actually so lovable and there is no reason not to fall for them in due time. Cheers!
@islandrose (686)
• Philippines
11 Oct 07
Hi Sha!
If you choose the one you love but doesn't love you as you do, in the future you will encounter problems because he will surely look for the one he loves so much. If you choose the one who loves you so much but you don't feel the same, good if you will learn to love him, if not you will feel a missing link in your life and you will not feel the real happiness. Therefore, just stay single my dear...he,he,he!
@shameh1202 (610)
• Philippines
11 Oct 07
A very witty answer. You've given the pro's and con's of the two situations.. I really appreciate that. Thanks a lot!
@honeylou_blash (7)
•
19 Feb 08
well, it's the hardest thing of being in love...if you're torn between two lovers.
in my own point of view, it would be wiser to choose the one who loves me because love can be learned through time..its not hard to love someone who always cares and makes you feel special at all times..i am sure that your life will be miserable if you choose the one you love because its harder to force someone to love you back.
@shameh1202 (610)
• Philippines
27 Mar 08
Hi honeylou_blash! I understand your point. It is really so hard to be in this kind of situation. However, life is never really fair. And it is a fact that a lot of people do experience this kind of situation. We have the same of concept of choosing the one who loves us because love could always be learned. Yet choosing someone whom we love is also nice yet quite complicated and might cause us so much pain. What if that person could never afford to love us in return? So for me, it is always better to be with someone who loves us for it is always easy to be with someone who cares a lot for us. Cheers girl!
@xiaovivien (154)
• China
11 Oct 07
I will choose the one who loves me.In my opinion,if the one love you,he will take good care of you,he will try his best to make you happy,he will never hurt you,and he will consider you as his whole life:)I think I can become more and more happy after I choose the person who loves me.
@shameh1202 (610)
• Philippines
11 Oct 07
Exactly! That should be the right thing to do because loving someone who can't love you back would be useless. It's like killing yourself slowly:-(
@cheisentie (142)
• Philippines
11 Oct 07
hmmm, it's too unfair when you both go to a relationship but you both don't know what's your true feeling for each other or if you have both doubt about ur feelings,, maybe it's better if you make sure with your feelings before your go to a relationship, well the decision about those problem is depend on you,, you choose the who can make you happy and ur happy to be with..
@shameh1202 (610)
• Philippines
11 Oct 07
But that's the reality in life and we can do nothing in life. There are really those people you love who loves another and there are those people who loves you but you couldn't give him love in return. That's reality dear!
@sid556 (30959)
• United States
27 Mar 08
Id have to go with the one whom I love. It is a chance to be sure...not knowing if the other person loves me back but think about it....how long can a relationship last if the love is only one-sided regardless of which one loves and which one doesn't.
@sjan011380 (78)
• Philippines
11 Oct 07
If ever im torn between two lovers.. the first one is the one i love and the second one is the one who loves me.. hhmmm, im going to choose the one who loves me. because its not wrong to love someone who cant love us but i think it would be better to be with someone who could make you feel loved.
@shameh1202 (610)
• Philippines
11 Oct 07
You've a very practical answer and a very wise heart. We should settle for the ones who love us and give them love in return than to be with someone who's heart belongs to another. We only live once so we should make it right and we should take care of our heart too because once a heart is broken, it could never be whole again for broken heart has no spare parts.
@philly_9112003 (334)
• United States
15 Jan 08
Im young,, i dont really get the whole Love concept.. I dont thinnk i can ever be torn btwn two people... its not my style... I can tell a female about the other female and she will be like its ok as long as im your main girll.. thats how it goes on my side of town
