Long lasting marriage
By motivatedmom
@motivatedmom (39)
United States
October 10, 2007 11:39pm CST
How do you keep the spark in your marriage with a 3 1/2 year old and a 2 month old that is very high maintenace. I am trying my hardest to make time for all three of them. Not anything to worry about like divorce or anything. But I would just like some suggestion on making my home a happy home between adults.
2 people like this
5 responses
@aaidjs (1149)
• Croatia (Hrvatska)
13 Oct 07
Hi there!!in my opinion only a small thing can make a couple life more interesting!!first of all you have to spend quality time with your hubby!!Let him be a part of your children and your life. Talk with him about your day with children and take attention when he try to tell you something about his job!!For your good,and ,on first place for good of your children bed time have to be in 8 or9 pm. no letter!!On the evening children have to be in bed and you can spend that time with hubby ,friends,in front of TV etc...and for the end you have to be happy to make other people happy!!Try it,You can do it!!!Warmest Regards Silvana
@gorgzlady1904 (84)
• Philippines
13 Oct 07
Exert SOMETHING NEW to the relationship-in every aspect of it. Like the two of you can have a hobby together, like ballroom dancing, or simply play badminton outdoors.
@susanna80 (12)
• United States
12 Oct 07
I have been married 4 years and have 2 children as well, a boy that is 4yrs and another boy 2 yrs. and believe me they are a hand full at this age :) And I can understand your question completely. I believe that keeping the spark in one's marriage is a life-time job. Because you got to have varity in what you do to have that spark or you will get bored.
I think it is a varity of little things that will keep the spark there. Keep your spouse guessing and never knowing what you are going to do next. For a person like me I could never sit and watch a movie every Friday night, that is extremely boring to me. But I guess that works for some. Get some books that will give you ideas of things you can do and find the ones that you are comfortable doing and try them. I mention books because not everyone has the creative ability to know what to do. Married couples tend to be what their parents were cause that's all they knew. And if our parent's didn't have a fun, sparkling marriage we aren't going to know how to have one.
@stephanie78 (122)
• United States
12 Oct 07
I am a married mother of four, and when we met we brought two children into the relationship with us, so from the very beginning it was always us plus the kids. We have been married for eight years now, and it is hard to keep the spark alive but the main thing I have had to learn is that my husband comes first. We put the kids into bed at 8 every night, regardless of whether or not there is school the next day, this way we have adult time to relax, talk, etc. I also try really hard to make him feel special, send him emails during the day just to tell him I Love you, make his favorite foods, etc. It is hard to be both a mother and a wife, and unfortunately it is something you have to learn to balance in your life, there is no magic answer or script to follow, you just have to work it out for yourself. Even though your kids are important and should always be your number one you have to make your marriage a priority as well.
@milkfish (371)
• Philippines
12 Oct 07
I'm only married for four years and so far, so good. Mothers/wives are usually preoccupied with our domestic obligations (taking care of the kids, household chores). Sometimes, we are just too tired to have a "romantic" moment with our husbands. Its not beacuse we don't like them anymore. Its just that we are too stressed out.
I suggest that husbands and wives should have a time for just the two of them. It could be when the kids are all in bed or are still in school. My husband and I make it a point to have a "date" during special occassions. We have dinner somewhere or watch a good movie together in a cinema. These are simple things to keep the romance alive.