What ex-lovers expect from each other,friendship it's hard
By one2love
@one2love (16)
United States
October 22, 2007 1:27pm CST
Do you have a ex lover who wants to be your friend? It's hard when you care about someone but they are still seeing there ex-lover not physical but it's the point that they are still together some how.My question is how do you handle the games women play with men.They tell you that they care but really they just care about what bill you can pay for them because they don't get a check every week but have all these bills.And in return you pay these bills to be with them but they really don't care about you or your feelings.Help me do i need to stay friends or just walk away.I need so help because i'm torn for the last time by any women.Ladies i would like to her what you have to say also I'm a very loving person who needs help.
2 people like this
2 responses
@lecanis (16647)
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
22 Oct 07
I'm a little taken aback by the things you say about women here. I work, and make my own money, so I guess I don't understand the things you are saying about women only wanting money from men. Not only that, but I know I have never been in a relationship just to have money, in fact, I broke off a relationship with a VERY rich guy right before we were supposed to get married, because he cheated on me. If I were the type of woman you were speaking about, I would have just stayed with him.
It is very sad that you've had to deal with a woman like this. If you truly believe that money was the reason she was with you, I don't see any reason to be friends with you. However, if you think she really did have feelings for you, then a friendship could have value.
It can be hard to be friends with an ex, but it can be managed. I think mostly the easy way to do it is to put some space between you for a bit. Maybe talk on the phone or online but not meet much in person at first, or meet only when going somewhere with a group of friends, instead of hanging out together alone.
1 person likes this
@one2love (16)
• United States
22 Oct 07
She was my best friend for 16yrs before we started this relationhship i do care about her i just wish she cared the same for me.i will do anything just about for her and she know i love hard but what is love a feeling or a state of mind what is it im old enough to understand but why do i feel like this i really care about her.
2 people like this
@lecanis (16647)
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
22 Oct 07
If she was your best friend for 16 years, then I can understand wanting to salvage the friendship! I didn't get that impression from your original post, considering your rant about women and money.
Love is a strange thing. I've been in love with people who were my best friends before. In fact, my current best friend and I are kind of taking a break from each other because of a previous romantic relationship, but I still think of her as my best friend... and when we do talk, it's starting to feel like it used to before.
I wish I knew exactly why we loved people, or what to do about it when the love isn't returned, or at least not in the same way. I'm sorry to hear about your situation, and I hope you can salvage your precious friendship.
1 person likes this
@BayleighGray (4334)
• United States
22 Oct 07
One, listen to Lecanis, she knows what she is talking about!!!
You go girl! ;)
Bay xx
1 person likes this
@BayleighGray (4334)
• United States
22 Oct 07
OKAY!!!
Your just messing with the wrong women then honey. Im a perfectly independent woman who loves my man for who he is, not what he can provide for me. I also dont have "friends" that provide me a means to pay a bill. I dont operate that way, and I never have.
Im sorry that you have experienced women like this, we are all not this way. I think you should walk away, nice knowing you! You know what I mean?
Its great to be a nice guy, but dont let yourself get walked on. There is no law in relationships that say you have to pay a womans bill to show her you love her. If your "married" to this woman, then you have an obligation by LAW to do this. They are her bills and she needs to pay them, not sit on her a** while some man she really doesnt care for pays them.
Let me change what I said a bit, dont just walk away, bloody run for your life!! If you want a woman to love you for who you are, then when you show interest and she does too, the first sign she shows that she wants you to pay for something other than a meal or a movie, RUN!!!
You will find a woman who will appreciate your kindness and not take it for a weakness to get what she wants. Just take your time.
Best of luck hon!
Bay Lay Gray xx
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