Your Kids and Myspace

I'm not a parent, but I can give you an opinion from your childrens point of view. I had some trouble with this situation a few months back. I'm 19, have a myspace and would never let my parents see it. For one thing my myspace page is to keep in contact with old school friends and other people I can't talk with face to face on a regular basis. I really don't feel the need to talk to my parents, whom I see every day, on the internet. The second reason I would never let them be my friends on that site is because I would always feel like I'm being monitored by them. I'm a good girl and would never put up racey pictures or lude comments on a website. With that being said there are things that I'd rather them not see or judge me for. Keeping them out of that part of my life keeps a balance between my relationship with my family and my relationship with friends.

I am not sure about having your child's password, but I think as parents we need to keep tabs on what our children are posting to their personal webpages. Alot of kids don't realize that prospective employers are now starting to go to MySpace and Facebook to look for applicants' pages. Then based on what they see, that applicant may or may not be called for an interview. Also, I don't know about where you live, but here they have started showing PSAs on TV showing that anyone can see what you post to the internet. It shows grown men asking a young girl what color her panties are and when is she going to post something new. It is scary to think that many parents have no idea what their children are posting on the internet. Remember that girl earlier this year? I cannot remember her name, but they found her in Texas. She was 13 and had been lured away by her so-called internet friend who was only 15. They met on MySpace and he was 36. He molested and assaulted her repeatedly before she was able to get away and get help. Our kids may not like it, but as parents it is our job to protect them and if that mean invading their privacy sometimes, then we have to do it. I know one mom who has a MySpace account and her profile says that she is a 16 year old girl. She has tricked her two kids into adding her to their MySpace friends. This is how she keeps tabs on them. You gotta do what you gotta to keep your kids safe.

The 19 year old is an "adult." So you really cannot make them do anything unless they're living under your roof then you exert a degree of influence. On the other two, just let them know you want them to be safe especially with a lot of bad people out there.

If they are living under your roof, than they live by your rules!! Yes, you have every right to have their passwords. I dont want to worry you any more, but Im sure you are already aware of the dangers that lurk on the web which is why you keep tabs on their activity. They may not like it, but its for their own good and besides, if they are not doing anything bad, they shouldnt care anyway! When I grew up, my mother was constantly keeping tabs on everything i did and I hated it! But now I know why she did it and I know it was because she cared.

The problem with myspace is that it carries both positive and negative thoughts and ideas when it comes to parents considering whether or not their kids should have their own page. In my particular experience I had added one of my daughter's step-sisters as one of my friends and the step-mother actually got upset with me for encouraging access to the site. I had actually suggested to her that I thought that she had allowed her to have the site that she (the step-sister's mother) had the password and was monitoring the activity. Apparently this wasn't the case (though she still has her page to this day). Having the password to the site is definitely a good idea, as a parent; however, who is to say that the son/daughter wouldn't just set up a second account under a different name/age/location? Would it be too far of a stretch to say that a kid would figure out a way to have a site that wouldn't sound like their person at all? Although I have never heard of something like this happening, it is something that I have given some thought to.

If you really trust your child there really is no need for that. Until they do something thats makes you loose your rust in them, theres no reason why you should have it.

im 19 years old, and from experience friends of mine had one myspace that their parents saw, and one that their parents did see. my dad never really cared about any of that stuff so it didnt matter to me. Thats invasion of privacy making her give her the password! Thats stupid. Its not even that big of a deal. You just talk to your friends, just like the phone