Am i being unfair and oversensitive?
By hm1177
@hm1177 (1222)
November 19, 2007 12:37pm CST
I've been unwell since the start of july. I woke up feeling awful - swollen glands, tiredness, feverish etc and the doc put me on antibiotics which did nothing. blood tests all came back normal except high level of bilirubin (suggests gilberts syndrome), no improvement and at end of july ended up in hospital with jaundice, abdominal pain and generally unwell. Finally got seen by ent consultant where i had biopsy done (came back clear) bloods showed high white blood cell so consultant said i should have lymph node removed incase of lymphoma although it was unlikely. had that done friday and have to wait 2 weeks for results. All last night had severe wisdom tooth pain and was awake all night. dentist said i needed wisdom tooth out and put me on antibiotics. My boyfriend acts unsympathetic although he says he is. I get the feeling i should just get on with things whereas i feel totally down coz i'm sick of feeling ill. He also said he got the impression i wish i had cancer which really upsets me (obviously i dont) when i said it upset me he said i took it out of context. I really feel down and that i should be able to talk to him about it all but cant. he feels i keep stuff from him and that theres no point worrying about what it could be. am i being harsh by saying he's uncaring or am i justified?
2 responses
@Sira890 (45)
• Canada
19 Nov 07
There's nothing worse than feeling sick and not knowing why. I've been sick for over a year now, and only recently were the doctors able to figure out what was going on. Before they were able to properly diagnos me, I went through a lot of the same things your feeling now, especially the frustration and tiredness. I got to the point where I hoped they'd find something in the next batch of tests - even if it was something as serious as cancer. Then, at least I'd know what was going on with me, and we'd be able to start an effective treatment plan.
Of course you don't want to get cancer, but you might be subconsciously wishing for any sort of results, so you'll at least have some answers.
Don't worry if you're boyfriend doesn't understand everything you're going through. It's hard for the averge person to relate, because they haven't been through what you're going through. Plus, guys are sometimes just not good at understanding when we're not feeling well. He's probably frustrated that he can't "fix" you, and his frustration comes across as being insensitive. Remind him that you don't want him to "fix" you, and that you just need him to be there, even if all he can do is give you a hug and let you cry.
You should be able to talk to him, about how you're feeling both emotionally and physically. If he's not willing to at least listen and let you vent, then he needs a swift kick to the rear!
