Children close in age or spaced apart??
By nica269
@nica269 (1395)
United States
November 20, 2007 2:09pm CST
What works best for your situation? or what do you think would work best for you?
We decided that close in age will probably be best for us. I know it'll be hard work at first, but I think i'll be better in the long run. At least that's what we pray for :O)
1 response
@4monsters4me (2569)
• United States
20 Nov 07
When I was younger I always wanted my kids about 2 years apart. My brother is 2 years younger then me and it was pretty good that way.
After my first child was born I said I was waiting until she was potty trained before having another one because it was so stressful. I am so glad things didn't work out that way.
Instead I ended up with 3 kids under 3 years old. When my oldest was 15 months our son was born. Then 13 months after that our 2nd daughter was born. My oldest was 2 years and 4 months old when my 3rd child was born.
It was absolutely crazy for the first year--all 3 of them in diapers but now looking back it was the best experience. I can't imagine what it would have been like if I had spread them out like I had originally wanted. I loved watching them as toddlers. They loved each other so much and always played together--their own little play group.
Now they are older. They are 7, 6 and 5 and are still best friends. They all share 1 room because they can't sleep without each other. Most nights I find my son over on the girls' side of the room sleeping on the floor inbetween their beds.
I also have a 19 month old daughter and it was much harder to adjust to her coming along 3 1/2 years after my 3rd.
All in all I had 4 kids in just under 6 years and it was great.
@nica269 (1395)
• United States
20 Nov 07
That is an awesome story. I admire you for being still sane! JK!
I was ready to be pregnant again after only being unpregnant for 3 months. But the reality was that I don't think I could have handled it. We're ready to ttc #2, but there are times in the day that I doubt if I could handle two little ones in diapers. But now that I've read your story, I'm thinking it can't be that bad.
thanks for posting.
@4monsters4me (2569)
• United States
21 Nov 07
I've come to the conclusion that what you dream up before the baby comes is usually 10 times worse then reality. Not that it is a walk in the park but you get into a routine and after a couple of months things don't seem that hard. And after a couple of years you look back and think, "what was I so worried about...it wasn't that bad" lol. Just like child birth you gloss over all the bad parts.
I really did enjoy having them close together. After my 4th was born I was pretty sad that I couldn't have another one right away because I thought she would miss out on that bond my other kids have. We didn't have the money for another baby and I don't think my body could have handled it. I'm just getting old (I say with great sarcasm as I was only 29 when I had her but I felt like I was 40).
But she ended up having the most amazing bond with her brother. He is 4 1/2 years older then her and wanted a brother more then anything in the world but got another sister. He cried in the hospital after she was born he was so upset. So after he calmed down we let him hold the new baby before his sisters. He sat in Daddy's lap and stared into her face and a smile grew on his and he was in love.
He did and still does everything for her. And she follows him through the house like a puppy. One of her first real words was "Bubby" which is what we call our son. Right after that she learned to say his name, Owen. When he started Kindergarten she screamed as we left the school and cried all day. She still wanders through the house calling for him when he is at school and practically knocks him over with her hugs when he gets home every day. It is so cute.
I asked my son over the summer what he thought of having another baby, if he would want a brother or sister this time. He looked at me very seriously and said he didn't want either. He is so in love with his baby sister that he can't even fathom bringing another baby into the house for him to share his love with...kind of sounds like most of the first time moms I have talked to that suddenly find themselves pregnant again and trying to figure out how they can love 2 babies. I think you heart just kind of expands to fit 2 loves in there, lol.
