I think I am living single white female part 2. This time is mother and child!!
By dloveli
@dloveli (4366)
United States
November 24, 2007 3:13pm CST
I am really beginning to become concerned. I have been discussing how One of my good friends seems to always try to buy what I buy, want what I want, do what I do, she wants to be me. ANd god only knows why. It seems that everything I mention myself or my family wants, she already has it or will go out and get it.
I have been noticing strange things lately, such as I get in the car and she is wearing a pair of pants I just bought. Come to find out she went and bought them. She did the same thing with a present I got for my daughter. At first, I was flattered. If I say I like or want it, she buys it. Now I say I like the things I hate. And if I like it, I say I hate It!
Today, there was a big xmas parade in my town. This morning my friend I went to the store so I could purchase some xmas socks, mittens, scarves, and different items I could use to make my daughter and myself look really festive. I bought me and my daughter flannel PJ pants, thermal tshirts and red hair ribbons and bells for our ponytails.
At 12 noon my friend calls me and says she is on her way. I told her I would meet her outside and to beep the horn. At 12:20 my daughter comes running upstairs very upset. She said "Mom come here quick!" I run downstairs and low and behold there is my friend and her daughter with the exact outfits on that me and mine have on. She even had the same bag. she doesnt even carry a bag. That was it! I asked her what she was doing. SHe said what do you mean. I lost it. What scares me is that she thinks that there shouldnt be a problem. If it was a coincidence, than okay. But it wasnt. She knew my intentions were to dress up in a cute christmas outfit and celebrate the coming holidays. Instead we looked like an elf wannabe fan club.lol I think she likes the idea of being me except for the fact that I am broke. I am starting to believe shes doing this to show me how much money she has. I could careless about her money. I am a big one on individuality. I honestly feel she trys to aggrivate my daughter. But why? What do you think? what should I do?
2 people like this
7 responses
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
24 Nov 07
I had a friend like that too. and it drove me insane. I finally asked her if she had no imagination...why she had to copy whatever I did. You are right....at first it feel flattering.....then it gets wearing...then.....my friend tried to "out do" me everytime. I don't talk to her alot anymore. I still see her once in a while. I really don't understand their line of thinking and I think maybe if you ask her point blank she might get the hint. Otherwise it depends on how much it irritates you. You might have to sever the relationship!
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
26 Nov 07
I feel for you! I had a "friend"...this is how bad it was. I am a writer and I sell my books etc at craft fairs and art festivals...so I am going to a big art festival and a couple of day before she says to come over. I go over and she has bought some display racks for MY greeting cards I also sell...then she tells me that the racks might be too big for my cards but would fit her cards! She wants to bring her greeting cards...and sell them at the art festival...where I paid $50.00 for a spot...to sell my greeting cards....Guess what I told her!!! And it wasn't very nice either! I should have told her to get her own life! Thanks for letting me vent!
@dloveli (4366)
• United States
25 Nov 07
Finally someone who understands. Ive been posting different examples of her behavior and the responses I got were ok. I got the impression that I was being blamed. I really appreciate the feedback but I felt that I wasnt getting the point across. When I read your response it was as if I was me. It makes me sick. I couldnt believe it . This woman has way more than I have and she wants the things that I have. My daughter was so upset. I have said something. My daughter wanted and Ipod when my friend found out it was"Oh my god my girl wants that too." So my daughter said she wanted a digital camera. We were in the store and I pointed the one I bought and the next thing I knew she said to the saleslady "Can I have everything that goes with this please?" I lost it! I said, "are you serious? If I knew that I wouldnt have bought it. I dont want the girls in competition." My daughter wouldnt have a chance. I love her but I am not about to compete. And to be honest, my girl doesnt want to. I am seriously thinking about ending the whole relationship. The thing is she can is a great friend except for this. Although she even copied my thanksgiving dinner down to the family secrets. UGH!!!!!!
@eyewitness (1575)
• Netherlands
24 Nov 07
Wow or she is giving you a compliment for your taste of clothing and things or stuff or she's obsessed by you.
Both kind of freaks me out.I think you should ignore her behaviour.
Even though it's not funny but if she does buy those things to let you know she has money you better ignore her behaviour.
1 person likes this
@dloveli (4366)
• United States
25 Nov 07
I have been over it in my head a thousand times and I cant figure it out. Ive always wanted more money or more this or that. Now, I see that having money isnt always the greatest. I work to have things and I feel so rewarded. She doesnt work (her money is lawsuits) and has everything everyone else wants. I think that she rates her life on what she has not who she has in her life. It really is sad. Thanks
@Lindalinda (4111)
• Canada
25 Nov 07
Oh this is really creepy. If I were in this situation I would try and put some distance between me and that person. It is just bizarre to copy everything another person does. Don't tell her when you go shopping, don't show her what you bought and don't talk about your life. I think the problem is with her. You did nothing to bring this on.
@BayleighGray (4334)
• United States
25 Nov 07
Hi Dloveli,
I dont understand that! I wouldnt be able to hold my tongue either. If anything, I want buy something else so we dont like twins! I mean there has been times when me and my friends have bought the same thing, but we were not together and had no idea! So therefore we sort of discuss what are you going to wear and that sort of thing so we dont dress alike.
lol That movie creeped me out for that reason alone! I would talk with her, without getting angry, and tell her that you would like your own identity and if she keeps buying the exact same things you do, then you both need to communicate when your going to be using your purchases. If she keeps it up or gets offended, I just dont think I could be friends anymore. Thats too much strain on a relationship.
Bay Lay Gray xx
@dloveli (4366)
• United States
25 Nov 07
I have tried talking. I even acted like I had another friend who was doing it. You know what she said? She said, "Im glad im not like that" Can u believe it? I feel as if my head is going to blow off my shoulders. I like being with her, but her rationalism of certain situations is a little bit off.lol
@BayleighGray (4334)
• United States
25 Nov 07
Wow, lol shes off a little bit upstairs really. Your title is perfect too. Im sorry I just cant help but laugh a bit, not at you, but just the way your saying stuff. LOL
I dont know what else to tell ya hon. I have never had a friend like that, like I said, we have always consulted one another as to what we were wearing cos we know we have some clothes alike, or very similiar.
Have you thought about writting her a letter? Actually mailing it to her? LOL That might get her attention, and she wont have you right there to immediately respond too, might open up her eyes a bit. Im sorry! Poor thing! xx
@blueunicorn (2401)
• United States
24 Nov 07
OMG! I have had friends that copy what I do occassionally, but this is really scarey. I know it would be hard, but I would honestly tell her that it bothers you that you have nothing that is "yours". Then maybe stop hanging around with her quite so much. I'm kind of at a loss for advice past that. Good luck!
@dloveli (4366)
• United States
24 Nov 07
Thanks for your advice. I dont really know what I wanted when I posted this. I guess I wanted to put it out there to make sure that it wasnt me being selfish. When I first met her, she had her own style. She had nothing that even remotely resembled me. Today, Its like she raided my closet. Next she want the same hair style. Oh hell no
1 person likes this
@blueunicorn (2401)
• United States
24 Nov 07
Sometimes it helps just to hear other people "talk", even if you are not sure what you want to hear. That's what I love about this myLot community. You are never alone for too long before someone will chime in!
@joahnna18 (368)
• Philippines
26 Nov 07
Your story is disturbing. I mean it's ok if she only buy once in a lifetime you want but copying everything is too disturbing. maybe your friend has a problem. You should talk to her and tell her your side that you don't want to be copied all the time and it disturb you. maybe she will understand:) I hope so.. Happy posting my friend:)
