Boyfriend advice needed...

You know what - he may really be working hard to save up so you can have a wedding where everyone you want to invite can come, or so that you can have a place to live together. Sometimes a guy feels that by providing he is showing love/or he can take care of you. And for some guys, getting the ring and the perfect little house for their honey is how they show affection. And about going over to his house - some roommates have rules with eachother of no guests. I had a roommate and I hated that her boyfriend just walked in anytime like he lived there and they had the tv blaring as we worked opposite shifts. You don't mention if you live a distance from eachother where its tough to pop over. If I were you, I would allow yourself to accept invitations from friends to go to events and parties. Enjoy life. If he has always been this way, then it takes two to tango because you have put up with this for 8 years and this behavior comes at no surprise. You can't change people. Friendship is important in a marriage - its critical. But you are not like a "friend" who he can pick up where he left off with. I don't advocate playing games, but sometime when he calls say you are busy at the moment, but would love to talk over dinner. Men do more for if they are going to do more for a woman who is selective and is confident, cultivates her other interests, and decides to "choose him" versus a woman who waits by the phone for him to call because he has you and doesn't have to work at it. There could be some changes once you live together when you are married because you will be in the same house. sometimes people have to work to be together thats for sure. But don't expect to marry him to "change him" because he won;t. Let him work a little bit.

No, you're not being selfish. That's a normal human feeling. I know that as a woman, we would usually want or yearn for our loved one to give us that undivided attention. However, it seems, no matter how much we want it, some boys, some men are just insensitive. Oh yes, they love us, they do. And they are faithful to us. But they may be not that mushy type. My s/o is a workaholic. Sometimes, he does tend to neglect me especially when he has a deadline to meet, but it doesn't hurt me so much because I know he loves me. I think the best thing for you to get that attention is to make the first move... then you distract him from his concentration, even for just a few minutes. Don't wait for him to be the first one to be sweet to you... go ahead and make the first moves. I always do that, and whenever my s/o realizes that he's neglecting me, he says sorry and showers me with love even just for a moment. And that for me is always enough to know that hey, he loves me! I think your boyfriend is simply already comfortable with you.... it makes me think that he already treats you like a wife... the wife is the best friend who understands her man the most. Don't be sad. Be happy he's faithful to you. If you want something, don't just wait and expect it to come to you... do something to get it. I mean, if you want to feel that love and attention, give it to him, and that will make him give it back to you... I wish you the best!

A relatonship of 8 years cannot be made to beg for marriage-I admire your commitment to each other, I like the idea that this guy doesnt cheat on you, but meeting him once or twice a year is very disturbing, especially when such a meeting passes without any serious romantic engagement. It worries me just as it is beginning to worry you. You cannot keep waiting for an official engagement for ages-you need to face your boy friend with a fixed agenda on this subject-take him on and let him tell you in your terms, whether or not this is a mere game! In my culture, they say years are like water that flows from east to west-when water flows to the west, it never returns to the east, when 2007 ends, it wont rewind-it is gone, and each year that passes leaves a toll on your looks. You are not the same lynda70 of 8 years ago, and matters of marriage always take into consideration the dynamics of age and looks. My heart would completely break for you if this man you love so much is going keep making excuses for another 5 years and then later he tells you, he is not going to marry you after all!! I dont mean this is what he is trying to do, but you should not rule this altogether. Have a frank talk with this guy and make a big personal decision, it could help you stop wasting your fabulous life on unachieveable dreams.

I understand what you feel and I felt sad for you maybe you just missed him alot. Try to open what you feel in your situation with him maybe he thinks that the setup you have were just alright with you. Try to talk to him seriously if he did not understand what you feel better to thinks of it very very carefull coz something wrong and you better find it out. I know if you love somebody you have to spend a lot of time with him/her.

When we decide to marry somebody we need to think and wonder if we are going to have a good future with him. If you don't think you'll be happy with somebody, changing your mind is always an option.

No your not being selfish at al, naturally a girl would feel that way if her boyfriend was acting like that. But you should really make him sit down and talk over things with you.

you are not being selfish at all. He is. He is taking you for granted and not respecting you at all. This is not a relationship. I think you need to give him an ultimatum. Maybe that will make him see that he needs to change.

I like to be around my best freinds.