Do you ever wonder how your husband/ boyfriend lived without you?

I know how my husband got along without me... He did have his mother. Now I've taken her place. My husband needs a push all the time in the right direction. If he is home and getting up and we have to be somewhere he takes forever just to get dressed and ready. I swear you would think he's the woman in this relationship because he is worried about what cloths he wears and how his hair looks. I don't know exactly how he seems to be able to manage it when he is away for the military. It's like he has two sides. The perfect soldier that can get up and do what he has to do and then there's the home husband who can't seem to think for himself and I have to play 20 dumb questions. "Honey where's my coat?" Honey where's the remote?" Honey what's for dinner?" It's such a pain... and we don't have kids yet. I wonder if I could even handle kids with him too. I seriously am less stressed when he is away. He always says he will help me get things done when he gets home but with the way he can't seem to figure out how to do things anyway I end up doing it myself in the end.

I do feel the exact same way. Although, to be fair, I don't think he was equipped with any real life skills. When I met him, he was still living at home and the "taking care of himself" was little more than his parents barking orders at him at all times, so I don't think he ever really learned how to gauge for himself when things needed to be done, he just waited until he got yelled at. Conversely, if I ever yell at him, he screetches back at me and refuses to do it becuase I "sound like [his] mother". Well no sh*t... The major problem for me though is that it does feel like I'm taking care of a child and quite frankly, I hgate children. If I wanted one, I'd have one, but I don't, I won't and I'm not gonna put up with it from him, either.

Sounds like my husband. He drives me crazy too with his nonsense. He can't get his dirty clothes in the hamper to save his life. Then half the time he can't find what he is looking for and somehow that is my fault. I say the same thing--I'm not your mother or your maid and you are a big boy so do it yourself. He is always asking me to cook him stuff. Mostly he is joking with me when he asks but geesh. If you want a sandwich make it yourself. Heck my 7, 6 and 5 year olds can take care of themselves better then he can. I think his problem is he lived with his parents until he met me and his mom is one of those people that spoils everyone. She always cooked for him and did his laundry and cleaned up after him even though he was 23 when we met and he moved in with me. I had been living on my own since I was 19 and even before then my parents stopped doing everything for me. If I was hungry I cooked for myself, did my own laundry, etc from the time I was 12 or so.

Sounds like when he was single his mom took care of him and didn't teach him to do things for himself. When my kids were babies, I gave my husband just as much responsibility that I had with the kids. We took turns getting up in the middle of the night and also in the mornings. My husband does have the problem of finding his clothes though. I don't put his laundry away, he has to. Then he will say, "did you wash......" yes, I did, and I go and find it for him. I had 3 boys and have tried to teach them to be very self sufficient. It would be nice when they get married if their wives don't have to train them to help around the house.

I know how he lived without me in the Service (Air Force) because they cooked for him. But how he survived until I started dating him and cooking for him, I really don't know. If he cooks, potatoes and meat or bread and meat or cheese. He doesn't do veggies, fruit, or milk. I have to make veggies or he won't eat any. Bug him to buy milk so we have some (I don't have money for food right now, only some of the bills) and have it with something because he won't drink milk. He will have it in cereal or food, but he won't drink it. Drinking powdered, reconstituted milk as a kid made him not like drinking it. Fruit, about once a week, he may eat some. Usually if he runs out of sugary deserts like donuts, cookies, cakes, pies, pasteries, candy, etc. He buys all that stuff and man does he ever. I wash my husband's clothes, but in the morning, he's on his own. He gets his own clothes ready and makes his own lunch. He swears he doesn't eat breakfast, but he always grabs a donut on his way to work and some coffee or tea. Anything he could do when we met, I've made sure he still keeps doing except the laundry, but if he has no clothes for work, then he will do that, too. I'm working weekends and I've got him making my supper now. He actually made me veggies! Grilled green peppers and onions! Can your husband put his work clothes on top of his dresser for the next day? My hubbie does this before he goes to bed. Now getting him to remember to put the recycling out with the garbage, that's another story. Take care and happy husband training (Oh yes, the dog you can train, the husband, oh well, . . . )

I guess this is just one of those great universal problems! Thank you for posting this becuase I am going threw the same thing and thought that it was just becuase I'm to nice and have no back bone. But nope seems to me that men just enjoy being pampered and really think only about what they need and want. Even when you tell them that you are just on your last little leg and are going to buckle it doesn't get any better. They just get comfy having you take care of everything and be everything to everyone. Why change a great thing?

Yeah you are definitely not the only one who has this problem. I used to hate it when I was getting ready for school and my hubby was getting ready for work. Here I am getting me and a two year old ready so I can drive an hour south after dropping our son at daycare, and hubby just had to drive like 2 miles to work, and could he help get our son ready? NO! He could barely get himself ready.. "Honey where's my boot bands" "Honey, have you seen my cover?" "Honey I lost my keys have you seen them?" CONSTANT!!! Ugh it used to drive me INSANE! But you know the more I think about it, he is gradually getting better, and he didn't live on his own before we got married, he always lived with someone else. So... it's ok, we're getting there, slowly. Heck, 5 years of marriage and I am still training him... so good luck to you, I don't know how long you've been married but I know at least in my case I have a long way to go! hehe. You know, it is even so bad as when he was in the military, they have to roll their sleeves up during the summer. There is a certain way to do it, and he couldn't DO it but he taught me how. (those who can't do teach I guess huh?) So I can roll some awesome cammie sleeves. Well, when he was overseas, he actually had to PAY someone to roll them for him because "my wife usually does it for me" HAHAHA. Now talk about helpless!!!

my wife has it worse count your blessings when I get up to pee in the night I just jump back in bed and I wait till I freeze or till she puts covers on me

I must say that my husband does things that make me often wonder how he survived before me. He leaves his dirty socks on his pillow while sleeping, can't find anything, even if it is in his pocket, and all kinds of crazy dumb things. However there are times I feel truly blessed. Yesterday was stressful and exhausting. My husband let me get in the shower and take a nice long hot shower. When I got out he had put the baby to bed, taken care of dinner and moved the laundry around!

That's wifes/womans/girls are for. And as u know, men became a child when they have married. So, enjoy your life girls! :)