How to chase Christmas blues away?
By Angie97
@Angie97 (21)
Philippines
December 10, 2007 6:57am CST
I am now in my 3 years of separation. Within that period I moved on, tried to be happy with my 3 young children with me. But when I feel blue, I still find myself having this anger and hatred to my ex-husband on what he did to me (us) (he left us with another woman and he also did hurt me physically, and worst he does not support us especially our children. I'm wishing not to remember this things but still coming back. I don't want to spoil the coming season. I hope some good guy/gals over there could give me some advise what to do and I would really appreciate that.
3 responses
@penniless (3)
• Taiwan
11 Dec 07
Get on with life. Face your anger. But this time you should know how to handle anger and hurt, and should learn from the past. Now the present can always remind you of what your life has been, and you see it's different from what you might have planned or thought would do for you. Consider the past over. And in that way, no matter how unpleasant the reality or present, you should think rationally. Why would you think still of your ex-husband when he's nothing more to do with you? I know in laws that you should get support for your children, and the fact that it's him who went away with another woman gives you right to custody. So what would you want to happen to your life. Would you consider yourself a loser, woing forever to an unsuccessful marriage to a weak guy? Yes, I consider him weak because he's not a real man. I know lot of guys are still attracted to other girls but one good husband must know how to control himself, the fact that he chose to build a family with you.There are still lot in life. First, I might suggest don't resort yet to finding a next partner. Know yourself. And a mother, when you choose to be one, is a commitment. Love it. And love yourself.
@Angie97 (21)
• Philippines
11 Dec 07
Great! Your comment is more on me to Sacrifice (as I always do). Yes, I don't have yet another man instead nurturing my kids and focus my work. My anger kept on coming back because "Yes" he is not a good father...he is not giving a support even a single centavo. BUt yes, it is true..though very difficult (huhuhu) I have to go on. Thank you my so much for the good advice. Godbless!
@peavey (16936)
• United States
10 Dec 07
First, accept that your life has changed and the things that happened are over. "They're only memories, they're not realities," as the song goes. Look at today and live it instead of yesterday.
I know it's hard to get past this, but try your best for your children's sake.
One thing that might help is to create a new "tradition" for the holidays. Make it a point to help others by giving to food drives or coat drives or volunteering somewhere. Make decorations with the children or take them somewhere special. Look into the traditional Christmasy things and add something new, like baking a special cookie, or hanging candy canes on the tree or going to look at Christmas lights.
And hang in there. It does get easier with time.
