A former friend has cancer...

Best thing would be to forgive. But it also depends how bitter the fallouyt was. If the situation was not worth of forgiving, then you can stay in background and peray to God for her. We can't make all happy. Still if you have the strenght to forgive her, you can do that. it is the best thing to do.

Pray that God will give you the strength to forgive your friend and be there for her in her time of need. Try to imagine youself in her shoes and then give her what you would want. Remember, we all have the same basic needs. The number one need is love. Ask God to give you the grace to forgive.

i think you need to go to your friend, seat and talk to her, that will be the best way. cheer her up, just to foget that she is sick that will friend if you really her friend.

you cannot do anything in such matters you just have to wait and see what happens next because nothing is in your hand you just pray for your friend

It is hard to really give advice not knowing how serious the falling out was.Somethings can be a thing that you just cannot forget.Forgiveness is easy but the forgetting part is the real problem ...It appears that you are bothered by this and really want to reach out but fear rejection.I would suggest that you send her a card, telling her that you have found out about her condition and that you were sorry to hear that she has been sick.Let her know that even though you and her have had problems in the past that if she needs someone to talk to that you are there for her,mail it and await an answer, that way if she does not reply you will know that she is unforgiving and wants no more contact with you.Chances are she may feel the same way you do and wants to make amends,if so she will contact you...If she does not contact you then you have done all you can do under the circumstances...Good luck to you.

This will be different from what many people would say, I know, but in my opinion "pity" is never a good enough reason to try to rekindle a relationship that did not work out. You have not caused this woman's medical condition. I think that you would greet her back if you met by accident on a street corner or in a shop or in someone else's home and she greeted you. But without more reason than the fact that you were once friends years ago, I truly do not see where you are obligated to seek her out in her adversity unless you know of some thing that you and only you could do to help her in some measurable way. If she were to make the first move and reach out to you, then you would have ample opportunity to respond charitably, otherwise, I really don't quite see the point.

This is difficult. You obviously feel compassion for your ex friend. It may be that she doesn't want to see you. I dont mean to sound negative towards you, but s0ometimes years apart can form a gulf. If you truly feel the need to offer support, send her a card. Write your address, phone number & email address in it. A nice card with well chosen words. If she wants to resume contact, the card will give her a good opportunity.

This would be an embarassing situation for you but still you need to go with her forgetting all the things that happened in the past. I dont know whether I have the right to ask you to go with her but still I would request you to forget the past, think about her health condition and make the move with her atleast to convince her.

i think it is very human to forget the past specially falling out and now when the person is abt to leave everything that person should be forgiven for sure,just go and say hello,every thing will fall in place. blessings.

Well, you can start by sending a card to her if you find meeting face to face too daunting. Or maybe a call on the phone would be good. When a person is sick, even a bouquet of flowers will bring some joy into her life. Cos if she is having cancer that is terminal, she will tend to treasure her time left more than any other. Since you are a christian, like I always tell my catholic friends, pray to god to give you the strength to forgive her. What is past is past. No point dredging up the past and harp on it. Unless you can undo the past, no point revisiting the unpleasant moment. If you still cannot bring yourself to do any of the above, then just leave things be. Don't do anything. Period. The fact that you still feel the need to be there for your friend after the falling out so many years ago, shows that you still have a small thread in your heart to care for her. Do what you feel most comfortable with. Let your heart guide your mind for this.

You could forget the dispute and be there for her. No friendship should break up over a silly arguemnent, no matter who was at fault. If you were good friends and had fun together, then you should get in contact with her.

Hi,there! Sorry to hear that your friend has a cancer.I do think it'll be very nice of you if you can reconcile with her.She is a sicker now and I think she'll be very happy if she could see that her friend forget the things in the past and be with her again.It's always nice to tolerate and forgive if that'll bring a nice result to both of the two. Since problems happend in the past,let the things go.I hope you can forgive and reconcile with your friend again.Best regards for both of you! Have a nice day^_^

Rozie has a good point. But if you reconcil with her out of pity, as you put it, is the wrong thing to do. This person will know right away that your contacting them out of pity, and thats one thing a cancer patient doesn't need or want. Be true to yourself and your former friend. Just pray for them.

Since its been years you two have not seeing each other, why don't you just pay her a visit as a long lost freind fist rather then trying for a reconcialation at the moment.

recently I have found a few friends I haven't spoken to in YEARS. some, we just lost touch. but with a couple, we ended on bad terms. sometimes when u hold a grudge it's so hard to let it go, but I am so glad that I did. and that they let it go as well.. I made the first move. I found them on myspace and sent a message.. I think sometimes it can be better like that because u can get out what u want and no interruptions. it was the best move I have made. I haven't seen anyone face to face yet but now atleast were talking all the time. I know whats going on with them and they know whats going on with me and our relationships are on their way again. I think u just need to forget the past and leave it in the past.. sometimes people just make mistakes or do things or say things they shouldnt.. were only human. u just have to let it go. life is so short. we need to be forgiving of others (and of our selves!) and make sure when we leave this world we leave without the grudges. forgive and forget. if u make the first move and it doesnt work out, oh well, u tried. but you never know until u try.. she might be thinking about you and wondering how u are and maybe she would absolutely love to hear your voice.. be the bigger person and end it, and even if u aren't the one who caused the problems, be the bigger person and just say how sorry you are that things ended up the way they did. hopefully the 2 of you can have a great friendship again, but you can't until u make that step. good luck and God Bless! I will say a prayer for you and your friend that God heals your relationship and that he heals your friend from this cancer. prayer works and the more prayer the better!

one of the things about being a christian is to forgive no matter what it is. and don't do it because of her medical condition do it because you want to. and you can be a better person for it so just call her up or go to her house and tell you that she was on your mind and that you wanted to reconcile with her. can you remember what it was that made you so mad in the first place