Waiting 2 months and trying again?

I have asked my self this question numbers of times. My son is 10 months and I have some one asking me every day so when are you haveing another one. I really do want to enjoy the time that I have with just me and my son since I am a stay at home mom I get him all day to myself untill daddy comes home. They grow up to fast to have to start all over again and have a new born before your baby is even one you miss out on so much.

I think that part of it is social pressure, to be honest. I get asked every day by someone or other when I'm having a baby brother or sister for my son, and I've been asked that since he was just a couple months old. In my case, I don't much care what people think of me, so it didn't affect me much. However, I try to put myself into the shoes of some of the people I know, and see how their lives are different from mine. If I were one of those people who was really close to their family, and were being asked this question by my parents all the time, it might affect me. If I were someone who was part of a religion that encouraged having as many children as possible (like one of the Christian denominations we have in our area), then that might affect me. If I were being pressured by my partner to have more kids because "that's a woman's job", it might also affect me. None of those are the case for me. My husband and I have already decided we are only having one child, and no one is really in a position to influence me on that. However, I know a lot of women who are influenced by others, even on serious decisions like having a child.

My hubby's kids are about 18 months apart and they are very close, they share and apartment and have hung together all of their lives, they have played on the same hockey teams and were only a grade apart in school. My brothers are older then me or younger then me by 3 years, we are not close at all, my sister is 13 years younger then I. I think if we were closer in age, we would be closer as adult siblings.

I don't know many mothers who try to get pregnant again so soon, most of the people I know with kids that close together were "accidents" so to speak. My doctor never really gave me a date to try for the next baby. With the first baby the doctor told me to stop taking birth control for at least 6 months before having the next baby (he said it would take that long to get out of my system). WRONG! It only took 1 day!

In my opinion, I think it's better to have another baby after one or two years later. Bringing up two babies are so difficult and tiring. And your body also needs time to prepare for the next pregnancy. A few months seem to be in a hurry.

I definitely think that you should wait a while before trying to have another baby after just having one. You need to have time to spend with the first one and to bond with him before, as you say, pop out another one. There needs to be that special connection between mother and child before you have to start all over again. With my second son, my oldest son was only 10 months old, but the second one wasn't planned either...just happened and i was on birth control. It really put a damper on my and my son's relationship because I was having to deal with another infant before he even understood what it meant to have another baby in the house when he was still a baby himself. I really think it's a bad idea to have children that close together. I think waiting until the child is at least two is a lot better and the children will be a lot closer. My two boys now fight constantly, always competing for my attention. It's absolutely crazy. God bless

Doctors enjoy professional authority, that is why when they talk, we who are lay men just act-they wield so much authority that we risk following their instructions blindly-am sure they have alot of consideration when they tell you such, and these could be considerstions resulting from serious investigations conducted on you! Just follow what they say, if you had a personal oppinion, consult another Doctor, and he would tell you why your Doctor is saying what he is saying!

Because having babies close together is a lot of fun, and I'm not trying to be sarcastic. My first 3 kids were born in a 28 month span (June 2000, October 2001 and November 2002). My oldest was 6 months old when I got pregnant with #2 and he was 4 months old when I got pregnant with #3. I love it. All mine were c-sections, too, so that wore me out but I still wouldn't change it for anything. Of course, they weren't planned that way. #2 and #3 were both accidents (because of BC screw ups) and anniversary presents. Our wedding anniversary is January 7th (next week marks 8 years for us). Our son was born almost 9 months to the day from our 1st anniversary. #3 was born 9 months after we finally got to celebrate anniversary #2 (in February of that year). We kind of quit celebrating after that, lol. I can't imagine if we had waited. Our last baby was born in 2006. She is almost 6 years, 4 1/2 years and 3 1/2 years younger then her other siblings and, honestly, I hated it. I hated having to move back into baby mode, whereas it never phased me when #2 and #3 were born. And it was very surreal when #3 started to get older and there was no new baby in the house. If felt very odd and she was babied way too much. She is 5 now and still talks and acts like a 3 year old half the time. I'm trying not to make the same mistake with my youngest (who is now almost 21 months). After she was born I actually felt very guilty that I couldn't give her a sibling close in age. If my body could have handled it (I had a really rough pregnancy with her and a uterine infection after the surgery) and we had the money I probably would have been pregnant by the time she was 6 months old. In the end I much preferred the 1 year span between kids. I had too hard a time going from preschool aged kids to a new baby in the house. They are kind of all a handful now anyway (more so then when they were toddlers). They are 7 1/2, 6, 5 and almost 21 months.

Well, I say to each his/her own. I would never want to do it that way because I cherish each day with my daughter. She is two now, but we didn't bring her home until 10 months old (she was adopted from Guatemala). If my husband would agree, I would be ready to do it again, but I would have a hard time splitting up my time. So...I don't know. If people think they are ready again, I guess they should go for it.

Personally I have waited years between each of my children, and for my family that worked out perfectly. But for other families there could be plenty of legit reasons why they wish for their children to be closer in age. If mom is planning on taking a few years off from work, but then wants to resume her career then having them back to back may make sense for her. Or if the family knows that in X number of years they want to change careers & they'll no longer have health insurance. Or even just wanting the children to be close enough in age to be playmates. I think it's a personal decision & whatever works for your family is what's right for you.

Well, the main reason as to why doctors tell females to wait so long after they birth a first child is for several reasons- many of which deal with anatomy and biology of the female body. Females, are very complex organisms. They require so many things- and that is not just from a males prespective. You see, when a female concives, and is going through the diffent tri-mesters of the pregency [each tri-mester lasting 3 months], certain things go on in the body. The body, in a way, basically restructures itself. One such restructing is the moving of a lot of the abdominal tissue. Now, have you ever not worked out before, then one random day, you descide to work out. What happens? You become soar. This soarness is caused by the muscle tissue re-healling itself. Now lets take into consideration how large the female is. If her tissue is becoming restructured, and the restructuring last for about 9 months, it will take even longer for them to heal. Even though I do not really agree with the amont of time they are asking for when waiting to have another child, you also have to take into consideration this- a baby is hard work, and it requires a lot of undivided attention. Having another child, right after another child, does not allow for the mother to properly take care of the first child. Also, if the moster is suffering from post-pardom depression, this will make the task even harder. So, in a nutshell, those are the basic reasons why doctors tell females to wait so long after their first pregnancy. I hoped that helped you somewhat =].