abusive relationship

Dear Vicky, I am so sorry for what you have been through with your ex. I havn't been through exactly the same but similar. My first love had a drink problem and would get physically violent after having a drink. I tried to leave him ten times and eventually after three years of the ups and downs of the relationship i moved three hundred miles away from him. I remember about two weeks after my daughter and i had moved, i was walking her to her new school when i saw this red toyota pick-up truck coming round the corner of this quite narrow street, heading towards us. I actually jusmped in a bush dragging my daughter with me, thinking that it was his truck. It wasn't and i felt like a complete fool afterwards. The point i'm getting to here is that its very hard to let something like that go. You really need to get some form of counselling to try and come to terms with what happened, otherwise it will stay with you at this level forever, and probably get worse... If you've never actually talked about the full extent of what happened to you, you really have no way of letting it go. If you find it too hard talking to your fiance' about it, then maybe talking to someone whos not personally involved with you may help.. It will seem very hard at forst but when you build a trust with a therapist it gets easier.. Hope this helps and i hope that you find the strength to recover from this terrible ordeal..

Thank goodness, i do not encounter anybody like this person, and i hate this person,it is too sick

It is actually ok to vent out your feelings because i bet there are a lot of women out there who are also in this kind of relationship or was in this kind of relationship. In my relationship, i did have one boyfriend who was kind of abusive but thank God, i did sense it after few days when we started the relationship. He was so jealous with by friends even with my girl friends. When he was holding me, he is trying to hurt me. Im just thankful because my friends really stood up and encouraged me to break up with him and after 12 days i did broke up with him. The last time i heard about him, he was actually the bf of my classmate in college and she was also abused emotionally and even physically and they are actually on their third year. I cant be in that situation. Well its actually a lesson for me, to really know the person very well and not to rush things.