Should you "SHACK UP" before marriage? Yes? No? Why?
By DIVA3OG
@DIVA3OG (18)
United States
January 15, 2008 12:44am CST
I do not believe in "SHAKING UP" anymore. I just do not think its the best thing to do. I feel that the majority of people "SHACK UP" for financial reasons - not because they want to "get to know each other better".
When you "SHACK UP", It also takes the committment level out of the relationship..."WHY BUY THE COW WHEN YOU CAN GET THE MILK FOR FREE".
When you "SHACK UP", It makes it harder to leave the relationship when things are going bad. You tend to get too comfortable in the relationship, and you will put up with more drama than necessary.
You can definitely get to know each other without living together. This means spending more quality time together.
People should start the relationship off the right way, so it will stay right.
1 person likes this
4 responses
@lilaclady (28207)
• Australia
15 Jan 08
Allthe things you mentioned that happens when you shack up together is basically what happens when you get married so isn't it better that you see if that is what you want to commit to for the rest of your life after all i wouldn't buy a car with test driving it and marrying someone is so much more complicated than that....
@eden32 (3973)
• United States
15 Jan 08
My partner & I have lived together for 7 years now. I have no intention of ever getting married and very much prefer the way our relationship is. Our commitment to each other doesn't need to be sanctioned or recognized by the state or a church to be valuable to us.
1 person likes this
@vicky_lane4987 (980)
•
17 Jan 08
personally we are looking to move in together before we get married. i think that it is advisable for people to move in together. as you can get used to each other and things like that. but i guess it is a personal thing. but i cant wait to look forward to move in with william, as it is more time together
@SixPaulEleven (552)
• United States
15 Jan 08
"takes the committment level out of the relationship"
I totally disagree. Some of the most committed couple I know 'shack up' in your words without that legal binding piece of paper.
Whether you are married or not, all relationships require committment. Maybe they don't believe in marriage? Maybe one has been divorced and doesn't believe in it anymore? Maybe it's done for tax reasons? There are a lot of reasons people 'shack up' in your words, and not all of them are bad.
I lived with my husband for 4 years before we married and the ONLY reason we married is because my health insurance is better than his at his work. It's cheaper for me to pay for mine and his through my work than it was for him to pay for his own at his work.
Had it not have been for that, we wouldn't have gotten married.
"Spending more quality time together"
Kind of hard to know a person when you see them an hour or two a night and a few hours on the weekend. When you live together, you get the WHOLE picture, not just a piece or two.
