Does being a nice person come easy to you or do you have to work at it?

United States
January 22, 2008 11:07am CST
I recently responded to a discussion and when I read the response before mine I wanted to ask the writer if being that mean was they had to work at or if they are always like that! I'll admit I have my days when I'm not so nice but something or someone has to really tick me off to get me that way. By nature I'm a nice person and care about other people. I believe that what goes around comes around and I treat people the way I would want them to treat me. A lot of cliches' yes but it's the way I honestly feel and try to live my life. Do unto others is also another one that comes to mind...lol! Are you a naturally nice person or is it something you have to work at? Are you the 'bah humbug' type about everything and only see the bad in everything and everyone? What type of nature do you have?
10 people like this
27 responses
@byfaithonly (10698)
• United States
23 Jan 08
Being nice comes very easy for me, sometimes too easy because there have been many many times in my life that people have taken advantage of me due to the fact that I'm 'so nice'. I have to work at being 'not so nice'... Truth is though it doesn't work though and I'm usually nice :)
3 people like this
@webeishere (36313)
• United States
23 Jan 08
There are all too many individuals that use "nice" people for their own good. A shame but the truth. HAPPY POSTINGS FROM GRANDPA BOB !!~
1 person likes this
@byfaithonly (10698)
• United States
23 Jan 08
Yep - I was seeing a councelor a few years back and one day told her I felt like there was a sign on my forehead that said, "Use me and Abuse me" - she asked me who I thought put that sign there... I did, that was when I took the sign off and started working on not being too nice.
1 person likes this
@anup12 (4177)
• India
23 Jan 08
I think to become a nice person it takes a lot out of you. You have to create a long-lasting relationship and also a very clear-cut and conscise effort to be nice.
2 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
24 Jan 08
I would like to think that I am a nice Person I try to help and give advice and I am nice to people even when they are awful I will try my best to stay calm and put it across in the nicest possible way But yes there are a lot of nasty People on here I have noticed that to and I have had a few of them in my Discussions and I do not understand why People have to be nasty like that I really don't
1 person likes this
24 Jan 08
By nature I'm a nice person, but people when look at me think that I'm very serious.When they know me they change their pont of view.I treat people the way I would like to be treated by them, but sometimes it's very hard 'cause exists people that see bad in everything and in everyone and you can't do nothing to change it. Besides this there are some people that even when they knoe they are wrong they still insist in their opinion so how can you be always nice to them?
1 person likes this
@moneyandgc (3428)
• United States
24 Jan 08
My husband says that I am pessimistic, I prefer to think that I am realistic. During these times that he is saying this, rarely am I wrong about the negative outcome. I don't intentionally go out of my way to be rude or mean to people though. I do admit that if I have had a particularly bad day, I am much quicker to lose my temper when I am out and having to deal with other people's stupidity. I am not an outgoing, "talk to everyone" type of person. I know sometimes my husband wishes I was more social but I am just not, it just isn't me.
1 person likes this
@chrislotz (8137)
• Canada
29 Jan 08
I think I am a nice person most of the time. I don't think I have to work at it, I think it comes naturally to me. Although I do think before I speak so that I don't ever say anything I may regret one day. I don't think I am a mean person. I have a lot of friends and they seem to like me. My kids seem to like me and I think my hubby likes me. I know at times I don't like my hubby very much, because he can be mean when he's pissed off at me. He will just ignore me then.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160697)
• United States
24 Jan 08
I am usually a very nice person, I think. At least to people who do not know me well. It is harder to be nice to people who are close to me. I think that is very true of people in general. We are naturally nicer to people who are distant than to people who are friends and family. I try to be especially nice when I put something in writing because I know that it is open to wide interpretation without a voice. I also do not like to put anything in writing that might come back to bite me.
1 person likes this
@karthima (111)
• India
23 Jan 08
yes, of course . I'm a nice person naturally but when anger come i become wild. I donot get anger quite easily, i wait for a long time but when it crosses my limit then i fire at the opposite party.I love good things than things which make me happy.I'm good to all, even to people who do ill for me. I can bear anything for me, but not to my beloved.
1 person likes this
@naty1941 (2336)
• United States
23 Jan 08
I am usually a nice person and try to treat people with respect. Sometimes some people have assumed that I am weak because I am nice and they will push my buttons. I see the good in people until they prove differently.
1 person likes this
@fpd1955 (2074)
• United States
23 Jan 08
For me, it is easier being nice to people than being mean. I am not saying that I am never mean, but ususally if I am it is because someone is being mean to me or another person first. I do tend to get mean in standing up for others before myself. Especially if the other person is elderly, handicapped or defenseless against the mean people. PEACE
1 person likes this
@dlkuku (1935)
• United States
23 Jan 08
I am like you in that way, someone really has to make me really mad to be mean. I just can't be mean for the sake of being mean and I don't understand people who are. I figure they must really be a miserable and unhappy person to treat others that way, but even that is no excuse. I work with two women who are like that, just mean and spiteful especially if they don't like someone and they expect everyone else to be the same way towards this person. I just can't be like that and am trying my best to just be nuetral. I try to treat everyone with respect and dignity, I think everyone deserves that, even if it's not always easy.
1 person likes this
@worldwise1 (14885)
• United States
23 Jan 08
I consider myself a very nice person, ctry. I have never had a problem making friends-when I want to. Life has taught me, however, that you can be taken advantage of by certain people when you come across as "nice." Like you, I only become nasty when I am pushed. I always treat others the way I wish to be treated. I have a difficult time understanding all the mean things people are doing to each other all the time. It really makes me sad and makes me want to stay off somewhere to myself that much more.
1 person likes this
@lynnchua (3412)
• Singapore
23 Jan 08
I'm the soft kind, I usually won't reject someone or something that I could help.
1 person likes this
@zydtchb (32)
• China
23 Jan 08
i want to be a nice person,but i don't think it is easy for anyone to be a nice guy,AS it is hard to control your temper when you encounter something bad.
1 person likes this
@koikoikoi (1246)
• United States
23 Jan 08
Well it varies because it depends how you were raised. I mean some are raised as polite, nice, respectiful as possible. Others act what they see. If they see people yelling and see others being mean, their is a good chance they will be mean. On the other hand you can work at it. You can learn and/or work on how to be nice or be mean, it is possible to do it if you have the commitment.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Jan 08
My motto is to be "nice until it is time not to be nice."I am polite to strangers, that was the way I was brought up.But if you are rude or mean to me , I will come down on you like a rainstorm.
1 person likes this
@slickcut (8141)
• United States
22 Jan 08
I am a nice person,and anyonw who knows me knows that..When i get angry it is usually because someone is being very rude to me,which rarely happens....when this does happen i will cut that person some slack,and assume they are having a bad day,so i will give them a very nice answer and it really makes them ashamed,and they usually say something like "Oh i am sorry"...I feel there is good and bad in all of us,and the focus is to bring out the good,and ignore the bad...If something someone does to me bothers me,i will go to them and ask them why they feel that way or why they did it,and usually thos works wonders...In order to be treated nice and with respect you must first show it to others...When i was younger i was not this way,but through the years i have learned that to be this way is the correct way to treat others and it works everytime..A soft answer turns away wrath...No one has ever acommplished anything by being rude, and high tempered....
@djrules (45)
• India
22 Jan 08
I AM WHAT I AM i can be good to those who are good to me and bad to those who are bad with me.No one is ever perfect.
1 person likes this
@roberten (3128)
• United States
22 Jan 08
I work at it daily. As I got older, I became less tolerant for not so smart things. By nature I am nice and have a peacemaker personality but I am by no means a pushover. At times people take my kindness for weakness but that can be a fatal mistake. Rodney King is right, we all need to just get along becuz karma is a bear! LOL
1 person likes this
• United States
22 Jan 08
We're all human and we all have good and bad days. I admit I've had my fair share of grumpy days where I just didn't want to be bothered and maybe wasn't as friendly as I could be. Normally though I try to be nice to everyone, being a jerk really doesn't get any of us anywhere. I've had people tell me that I'm too nice and I've had others tell me that they thought I'd be a "b!tch" when they first met me until they talked to me. I'm usually a mellow person and can get along with just about anyone.
1 person likes this