Confessions

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I was wondering what other people had to confess about things they did when they were a kid. I am not talking about sordid things, just stuff you know that was a little crazy and maybe got into trouble, or could have if you had gotten caught. I have a list of really stupid things, but at the time they seemed to make some kind of sense and if they didn't, I just couldn't seem to help myself. Here's my list. 1. I had a blackball, ( jawbreaker ), candy, in my mouth, until it was small enough and then stuck it in my ear. Oh ya, that was a real fun time! This was the first thing I did that I can remember, around the age of four. I quickly got hauled off to the doctor for that one. Oh the pain! @. We had a ping pong table in our house and I loved playing doctor. I was the doctor and of course an all in one job. I managed to get the clamp that attaches to the table, and the net put onto my wrist and couldn't get it off. I started blatting to my big brother who was 17, ten years older than me, who informed me that I would have to get my arm sawed off. 3. Arouind ten years of age, we lived in the country in Southern Ontario. We had this real old antique pump, that was working and on the top there were three holes. I thought yes, I'll stick my middle finger into one of those holes. Then my finger was stuck. My father told me the fire department would have to be called, I would likely be dragging a pump around, hanging off my hand for the rest of my life. 4. That seemed to be a zinger of a year for me, because it wasn't long after I decided I'd try out my father's razor in the upstairs bathroom. I proceeded to completely shave off my left eyebrow. Oh...I thought...it's gone...what to do now...I'm in trouble now. In a panic I grabbed a bandaid and put that over the spot where my eyebrow once had been. Hmmm that wasn't going to work, I thought. So I went downstairs and then announced to my mother with a very positive attitude what I had done, figuring this might soften the impact. I announced to my mother I'd shaved my eyebrow off. She raised her voice a pitch, I ran upstairs balling my head off. After about a half hour of blatting my mother shouted to me from downstairs, if I didn't stop crying, she was going to tell my father. So I immediately shut up. Next day, out came the eyebrow pencil, and my mother sent me off to school. Thank God for the fact I didn't care about what I looked like, and thank God for mothers with eyebrow pencils. 5. I jumped of the roof in my backyard around at the age of 12. I got my feet caught up in the evestrough and fell onto the ground knocking the wind right out of myself with gravel embedded into my chin. My friends that were with me doing the same thing just laughed. I wasn't laughing. These days days I try to challenge myself in safer ways, and it's a good thing. And it's a good thing I managed to get the blackball, ping pong clamp, hand pump, the gravel removed without scars or worse, and thank God eyebrows grow back.