Words, Did they destroy or inspire you.

Hi,there RobinJ, Good morning to you.. As for me words that can both destroy me and inspire me,but most of the time no matter the good orbad words ,it is inspire me rather than destroy me as I think that I can't decide what others talk to me what others really think of me what I really cares is me myself that approve me . I remembered when I am a little child,my parents always said that I am a stupid,hopless child..everyone around me didn't like me either maybe due to the appearance and the studies marks.In school my maths teacher once said which I would never forget that is"even let the god to teach you I am sure you can't learn that",Actually ,the words hurt me deeply and made me cried a whole night .it is because of these words that made up my mind that I should try my best to overcome the problems in maths as most of the people think that if your maths is not really good then this marks that you are a stupid child.... In my high school,I did what I want and my maths ranks the first in my class ..thanks to that words that inspired me.. So what I wanna say is that it is not matters how others view us what others say about us ..what really count is our attitude towards them .. Molly;-)

Live in the NOW. I need to remember that. Because of the hurtful words directed to me in my childhood, I tried, probably too much, to make sure I did not use verbal abuse with my kids. The words really wanted to come out sometimes (that ingrained stuff we talked about on another discussion). That was how words have affected me. To try everyday, never to do that to anyone anywhere. And that is not necessarily a good thing. When does being overly considerate start to impact me?

My story is too long and I'm not sure I want everyone knowing it, but I will PM you one day and fill you in. We have alot in common.

I have to remember the that was then, this is now thoughts as when I do not succeed at something I always remember the words of my father when he was angry. "You're never going to amount to anything". I know he didn't mean it, as he was a hard working man and sometimes a workaholic. I knew that he was a loving father although he had a difficult time expressing it. He didn't get angry much, it's just when he did, he could say some things that he shouldn't have said. Hopefully to those of you reading if you have children you will not say these type of things to your children when you are upset with them.

Like you I got those nasty words growing up. I went to a physcologist once. He told me to write a list of things that happened to me but do not dwell on it. How do you not dwell on it? He read my pages and pages of stuff my parents put me though then he said. "You survired it, pat yourself on the back look where you are today. You are a mother, a nurse, a wife." What a freeing experience that was. I still have bad days but not very many of them.

Do they inspire or destroy... It dependes on what words... For the words of the friend, actually, will most of the time inspire me, even if those are bad words. SO they will inspire me to something better. Though at first they may destroy, they may depress, but as I know that my friends believe in me, they don't mean to hurt me... so let's try to take all the words as inspirations, this will give us the goal to work towards!)

I was always told as a child 'Stick and stones may break bones, but names will never hurt you' looking back I think what a load of rubbish, sorry but over the years words have wounded, hurt and upset me, ok so I am mega sensitive at times, but words have affected me, someone will say something to me and I will take it the wrong way. Words can be used as manipulation, for someone to control, patronize and put you down. After all it was words that got me into two very bad relationships. I actually wish that the abuse was physical, but mental it is both harder to prove and harder to get over for me that is, I can't speak for others. Words destroy, after all isn't that half the world's problems? Lack of communication or words that upset others and cause a chain reaction to war and pain. So give me the sticks and stone anytime.

of course words will do both, uplifting words make you feel good hateful words make you feel bad. even words that communicator thought was helpful may not be, I remember as a young teenager and having no self esteem and hearing constantly, you have a pretty face if you could only lose some weight is no better than the person saying you have a pretty face too bad you are so fat.