My bonding time..
By bamcee
@bamcee (15)
Philippines
14 responses
@JanisRemaxRealtor (432)
• United States
1 Feb 08
I have 3 children, 2 boys and a girl. My daughter is grown with her own kids. My oldest son is gone and my youngest son is 17 and still at home. I always ask him to get off of the phone (his favorite activity) and come help me in the kitchen. He now knows spices and herbs, can make tuna casserole, loves to help with cookies and assists with chicken dinners, mashers, etc. It is hard to find activities a Mom can do with her 17 year old son, but that seems to be a good one for the older children and young! We also eat our dinners together as well to discuss our days. He talks about politics, global warming, going green, the whold nine yards. Just talking to kids and not letting them hibernate in their rooms watching tv and talking on the phone is a good idea I think.
1 person likes this
@juliet17ak2002 (121)
• United States
8 Feb 08
I think the biggest thing is our night time ritual. We do a lot of other stuff but bed time is something for every day. I take as much time as they need to put them to bed. Sometimes it can be stressful when I have stuff to do but I try and set aside time for my girls. My oldest, whos now 3, was a co-sleeping baby who then moved into a crib next to me. So when we moved her into her own room soemtimes I lay next to her on the floor and hold her hand till she falls asleep. We also have a very involved tuck in. I give her kisses, hugs, tuck her in, then give her butterfly kisses, and then eskimo kisses. This is important to me because even when she was a baby she didn't like to be cuddled so this is when I get my attention as well.
@220870 (249)
• India
6 Feb 08
Although I do not get much time to spend with my children, because of their school, study load and other activities. I make it a point to ask 'how was the day'? at the end of the day. My children narrate interesting or disinteresting things that happened during the day to me. Besides that I play chess, carrom, scrabble etc. once in a way with them. This way there is some bonding and attachment built between the parent and child.
@missrhei (3)
• Philippines
5 Feb 08
Nice topic. I was able to read other families' bonding time and got ideas. My 3 year old son and I bond by playing together and singing the ABC. We also have this "bless, kiss and embrace" thing before I leave for work and when I came home.
Reading especially bedtime is an activity that I want to implement at home but it is very unlikely in our set-up. TV's one of the culprits and I'm too tired to read for him when I get home from work.
@jhazie (340)
• Philippines
3 Feb 08
Oh im still single and dont have kids of my own but soon i will get married but i have adopted shes 9 years old now, after giving birth to her, her real mom didnt see even glance her.
Being a mom to her like a bestfriend, we do all her stuff,lesson give her moral support to educate her anything.
Mostly mother love and cherish their children thats i do now to strengthen my relationship towards her. There is no sacrifice a loving parents is not prepared to make for the well-being and happiness of her/his children.
Happy posting!
@tinkerick (1257)
• United States
3 Feb 08
Watching movies, playing video games and shopping are my 3 main bonding times with my kids. We often do family movie night. Other nights it's just my husband, me and my 10 year old daughter (who shares my taste in films) watching movies together. She and I snuggle under the blanket on the couch together (usually with the cat too). My 6 year old son often comes to me for help on his latest video game. So I spend time with him snuggled on my lap while I (help) play his video game. My oldest - 12 year old - daughter usually bonds best with me when we shop alone together. It gives us time to talk undisturbed. Tink
@fianne (1057)
• United States
1 Feb 08
i do lots with my son... since he is still one year old as of now, we do much... i train him to walk well, play with him of building blocks, teach him how to say words, and one of the most i loved: eating time!!! hehehe... but also, when my child is sick, he looks for me all the time and i love it really, and when he is moving his bowels that is hard for him that makes him cry... i love it when he calls me mommy.
@ebsharer (5515)
• United States
1 Feb 08
My 1 year old and I go shopping. We go where ever and walk through the store counting things looking at different colors and trying different toys. We will find hats and I'll put them on myself and she laughs then I put them on her and I laugh she gets a kick out of hats that are to big for her. We stop and listen to the music in electrnoics and watch the BIG tvs for a few minutes. She loves seeing every thing that goes on around her. Even if we aren't there to buy some thing she has fun just walking and talking to me. Well trying to talk, not there yet.
Our other bonding time is at night before bed we sit on the couch and she has her bottle and lays on me I play with her hair and we relax together for about 20 minutes before bed. Shes happy and I'm happy my baby will still lay with me. I miss having to hold her bottle and stuff shes so independent now.
@snoopy04 (718)
• United States
1 Feb 08
I have started doing scrapbooks for each of my kids. I spend the afternoon letting them pick stuff out to put in their scrapbook and then we go through pics and stickers and I let them personalize it. Each book is different and unique and the kids get one on one time with me and the kids have fun as well.
I also have story time where we cuddle up in bed and I read to each one individually. Its great to cuddle and read fun and intresting books and also give my kids the gift of reading.
For my ten year old daughter we have Ericas day where she gets to choose what she wants to do like go to the park or a movie or just take a walk and spend quality time together.
I also do talk time with Erica as well. We sit down for about two hours and she can talk to me about anything she wants. I learn about what is going on at school and anything that may be bothering her and she feels like mom is listening to what she has to say.
These are just some of the way me and my kids bond.
@wolfcrystal (9)
• United States
2 Feb 08
when my girls were little up to about age 10 i read them bedtime stories and when the older one could read she and i would read to the younger one. and now that they are grown with children of their own they read to them. my oldest daughter even became a teacher. so reading to them stays with them through life.
@ellie333 (21016)
•
2 Feb 08
My 3 year old son loves to cook, so we have a cake making day which is good fun. Alos a neighbour bought round a cauliflower from her allotment and I let him help me prepare cauliflower cheese (its usually a struggle to get him to eat his veg) but because he helped he ate every bit which was fantastic. We also have a bedtime hour where we sit and snuggle and read books and painting mornings (not ever with glitter again though, its still turning up on everything!) My daughters are a lot older so we tend to have a takeaway and chat night or watch a movie or go clothes shopping together.
@EmTeeBee (64)
• Australia
2 Feb 08
It's harder to find things that reinforce the closeness as the kids get older, but recently my 11yo son came up with the idea of a secret handshake that we do when he feels the need to be close to me, and at those moments when it's really not cool to be hugging your mum. He sleeps in the top bunk, so it's the last thing we do after goodnight kisses before lights out. My daughter invented one for us too, so we are a secret handshake family, amongst other things.
@EmTeeBee (64)
• Australia
2 Feb 08
It's harder to find things that reinforce the closeness as the kids get older, but recently my 11yo son came up with the idea of a secret handshake that we do when he feels the need to be close to me, and at those moments when it's really not cool to be hugging your mum. He sleeps in the top bunk, so its the last thing we do after goodnight kisses before lights out. My daughter invented one for us too, so we are a secret handshake family, amongst other things.
@cydzzj (354)
• Australia
3 Feb 08
Our relationship with our child creates a pattern that will shape all his future relationships. This is why a child needs love, security, approval, and accpetance from the start. A lack of these can affect his self-esteem, his achievements, and his capacity to be happy.
But this does not mean that we have to let him do everything he wants; he must learn discipline as well as other skills, but we have to teach it in a loving way.
I remember someone said that"Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of life's longing for itself. They come through you but not from you. And though they are with you yet they do not belong to you."
We're need meeting children's needs, it's important in itself. Children need to be confident that their parents will attend to these physical needs is a timely manner and protect them from all forms of abuse.
It is not enough simply to be fed and watered. When children are confident they will be nurtured and that their parents will be sensitive to and alleviate their discomfort or pain, they are free to explore and learn more. They will develop trust in others and will be more likely as adults to be comfortable with intimate relationships.
And, because you have listened to and cooperated with their needs, they will be more likely in future to cooperate with what you need. They will care about you because you have cared for them.
I believe different families have defferent ways to achieve it.