Inconsiderate People.
By mamasan34
@mamasan34 (6518)
United States
February 10, 2008 8:46am CST
I am very upset right now. A friend asked my daughter and I to babysit her two year old while she went to a going away party at a restaurant. She said she would be back by 10:30 p.m. or 11p.m. at the latest. Around 10:45 I get a call saying that they are running a bit behind and would I mind if she picked her daughter up around midnight or 12:30. I said I didn't mind. Well, 12:30 rolls around and no one. About 1 a.m. we get a phone call from a strange man saying that they are on their way to pick up the baby. Her husband is in Iraq with my husband, they are best friends and they are stationed together. She is also in the Army, and I am sure that it is one of her buddies from work that is calling. Well, 1:30 rolls around, then 2 a.m., then 2:30 a.m. still no one. Around 2:45 we get a phone call wanting directions to our house from this guy. Apparently she is to drunk and unable to drive and they were taking her home. What makes me upset is that it is almost 3 in the morning when she comes to pick up the baby, she is drunk and the baby is asleep. We had to be in church this morning and I missed the service because I was so tired I couldn't wake up. What also makes me upset is that when she dropped off the baby, she had just told me that she had quit smoking and drinking and had returned to church. Her husband told her that she was drinking far too much and that she needed to stop because she is a mother and a wife, not somebody's drinking buddy. So, I guess that went to pot. So, do you know anyone this inconsiderate?
2 people like this
13 responses
@dloveli (4366)
• United States
10 Feb 08
She is soooo lucky you are watching her and not me. I would have made her pick up the baby in the morning. As much as I would hate it, the child is innocent in all this. If I were you I would also let your husband know exactly what's going on. That child was in danger. I would like to know who is speaking in the child's behalf? Obviously no one, not even the mother was concerned that she was inconveniencing you and yours and putting her childs life at risk. Shame on her!! I would make sure that after a few days, I would make sure she knows how you feel. You know what really gets me? So many woman would die to have children. Here is this woman who obviously doesnt care about anything but her drinking and friends, and she is blessed with such a gift. Dont get me wrong, I know you are only the babysitter and have nothing to do with the mom's decisions. But I have seen this so much lately. I am only thankful that you and your daughter were watching her. I am sorry you missed service. God know's why!!!!!
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
13 Feb 08
I agree. I have only been able to have one child. It's unfortunate to see others with such blessings to be treated like such burdens. I don't think this girl does this to the extreme, but she does take advantage of other people when it comes to her fun time. Which is unfortunate for her because I won't babysit for her again. Thanks!
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
11 Feb 08
Well, her husband is one of my best friends. So, as soon as I get the opportunity I will have my husband pass the news on to him. He is in Iraq with my hubby right now. Which makes this sitaution even more difficult. I won't be babysitting the baby anymore. I can't allow myself to get involved. I hate that I have to be that way, but I have enough problems of my own. It's unfortunate that she has been blessed with such a gift and she can't or won't handle herself accordingly. I only have one child and wanted another so badly. Your right, she is blessed but abuses it. I don't know why young women have children and then not take the responsibility that goes with it.
@dloveli (4366)
• United States
11 Feb 08
I have lost three children due to my high-risk status. I am 38 years old and pray to heaven every day that I could have one more. I hate opening the newspaper, watching the news because all you see is people taking for granted that children are a gift not a burden. I see these women applying for assistance and food stamps then buy things for themselves instead of things for their children. Having nice things is great only if the necessities come first.
1 person likes this
@4mymak (1793)
• Malaysia
11 Feb 08
Your 'friend'... needs help, dont you think ?
Her husband did say she drinks too much,... i guess being at a party, and no one to 'caution' her.. she must've overdone it..
good thing... no one 'took advantage' of her... ( i hope...)...
and another good thing... her baby had someone more responsible to look after her that night...
(if it was me... i would just let the baby sleep over rather than let the mom take her home...)
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
12 Feb 08
I have been thinking about that, and I do feel bad that I didn't keep the baby. I am just so tired of dealing with things like that. I guess I am just getting to old to be dealing with this stuff. I just don't think I am going to babysit anymore. Thanks.
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
12 Feb 08
I have been thinking about that, and I do feel bad that I didn't keep the baby. I am just so tired of dealing with things like that. I guess I am just getting to old to be dealing with this stuff. I just don't think I am going to babysit anymore. Thanks.
@carolbee (16230)
• United States
18 Feb 08
I don't blame you for feeling bitter about this situation. That's really taking advantage of a person. I sure wouldn't offer to babysit again. And then to show up drunk and have to handle the baby could be risky.
I really don't know anyone this inconsiderate. Even when I am out of state staying with the grandkids, our daughter always comes home at a reasonable time.
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
19 Feb 08
It really makes me pretty mad really. I don't like to judge, but facts are facts. I really hope she straightens up. I know that I can't handle situations like that anymore and I have to limit my exposure to things like that these days. I have enough stress in my life as it is. Even if it wasn't the matter of her drinking, her daughter is almost three years old and is still in diapers. She hasn't even begun potty training her. I think that is just unfair to the child and just plain lazy. Thanks for responding.
@heavenschild (4777)
• Canada
10 Feb 08
My dear mamasan I am so sorry that you went through this and I am sad for this woman who obviously has a problem and she is in the Army also...Well, I am just sorry to hear of this and am sorry for the baby as well...How will she be looking after her child today if she was so drunk at that hour?
Oh, My prayers will be with that baby and the mother!
Take Care My Dear Friend!
Love and Hugs
~Heavens~
1 person likes this
@heavenschild (4777)
• Canada
11 Feb 08
I agree with you entirely mamsan and I shall be praying for him as well!
Take Care
~Heavens~
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
10 Feb 08
I would pray for her husband to because he has to tolerate this behavior from her while he is overseas. She parties entirely way to much to be a mother and a wife. She needs to decide on what she watns in her life. That poor baby shouldn't have to deal with that.
1 person likes this
@asgtswife04 (2475)
• United States
11 Feb 08
Unfortunately, yes i do. I babysit for a girl i go to church with until she gets off work. She's supposed to get off at 5 every day, but there are times she won't pick her kids up until 7 or 8 and doesn't even have the curtesy to call me and tell me. and if i keep her kids all night i won't hear from her until late the next day about when she's gonna pick them up. she was a on fire Christian, but has recently back slidden and goes out partying all the time. it's awful and i really wanna tell her i can't keep her kids anymore, but i feel sorry for the kids so i keep my mouth shut. anyways, sorry you had to go through all of that. it sucks i know. God bless girl and keep in touch
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
11 Feb 08
Girl, you so know how I feel then! I am sorry that you have that same experience. Just to let you know, I have been trying to get on yahoo and it keeps freezing up on me and kicking me off. I am not on long enough to be able to talk to you at all. It makes me so darn mad!
@asgtswife04 (2475)
• United States
11 Feb 08
LOL! It's okay. I kept seeing you go on and off last night,so i figured something was up with it. You might have to uninstall it and download it again. I've had to do that before over the same things. I'll talk to ya soon. bye girl!
1 person likes this
@sminut13 (1783)
• Singapore
10 Feb 08
oooh, reading your post makes me feel really irritated too. here, people would be really embarassed or awkward to ask for help at that time. if it was urgent business, one could understand but party?? man i get really irritated when people don't look after their kids properly and leave them just so they can enjoy themselves. i guess she asked for your help as you're friends with her. but if my friends said that they'd be back around 10.30pm or 11pm, i'd still be irritated as i'd want to sleep early. she's really inconsiderate.
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
10 Feb 08
Your right! She is very inconsiderate. I don't mind watching her child but when she tells me she will be here at a certain time, she should be here at that time.
@lovespecialangel (3632)
• United States
20 Feb 08
WOW! This is very inconsiderate. I don't personally know anyone like that. At least not that I can think of. I can't believe a mom would do such a thing. Then again there are alot of things I have heard of mom's doing that I don't agree with. Did she even appologize for what she did? I'm sorry that you had to go through that!
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
10 Feb 08
That is bad
As it also puts you in a bad position to with your Husband being good Friends with hers and if I where you I would not babysit again for her
I have had this happen to me a few times and they didn't even phone to say they would be late they just turned up late
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
11 Feb 08
I think this will be the last time. It's one thing to be an hour late, it's another to be 2 1/2 hours late. I didn't get to bed until after 3 a.m. My duaghter is 13 and she shouldn't have had to stay up either. She did because she said she accepted the responsiblity of keeping the baby. The woman paid my duaghter but that's not the point. I am still hot about this as you can tell. I will be letting my husband know that he needs to talk to her husband. Thanks
!
@polachicago (18716)
• United States
10 Feb 08
This is very disturbing. I wouldn't agree to do it anymore.
It is lock of respect on her site.
She should respect you and your life.
Friends don't do it to friends.
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
11 Feb 08
Thank you so much for saying that. I believe that as well. I wouldn't do it to someone else and I don't want that done to me.
@twoey68 (13627)
• United States
11 Feb 08
Since I used to run a daycare for the state and parents would often ask me to watch their kids after work I had a hard and fast rule: If your gonna be out past 11pm the kid stays overnight. I don't do the whole sit up all night waiting and it's not good for kids to be hauled in and out in the middle of the night. Most kids will sleep through the night so it was easier all the way around if they just stayed over but they had to be picked up no later than 9am the next morning.
I definately wouldn't babysit for this person again and I can only imagine what her husband would think if he found out.
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
13 Feb 08
I couldn't depend on her to pick her daughter up at 9 a.m. or anything like that. I couldn't depend on her to pick her daughter up at the time she appointed. I just decided it is best all around that I don't babysit for her again. My husband is going to tell her husband and why. I just hope it doesn't cause problems between my husband and his friendship. Thanks!
@wondericequeen (7876)
• Hong Kong
13 Feb 08
I would be really mad if I knew your "friend". admit that I know a lot of inconsiderate people and they are immediately screened out of my friend's list at once. I guess I really can't stand people that are inconsiderate. Me and my parents are raised to be considerate to others and think things in different angles, so whenever I know someone who's inconsiderate, those make me have a boiling temper! *smiles*
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
13 Feb 08
I agree wtih you. I tend to reach my boiling point too. I just hope in the future I can say no more often. i tend to be too nice adn let people take advantage of me.
@dstrent (112)
• United States
11 Feb 08
I have to say that I don't know anyone that way at all. I would consider not helping her anymore. I read that you enjoy having her over and stuff. That's good. Maybe you need to be that friend that hurts her feelings a little bit and tells her what kind of life she should be leading as a mother and wife. Maybe you can give her the help she needs to straighten out. Good luck to you in this adventure you may head out on.
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
11 Feb 08
I told her husband how I felt, and he did have a talk with her, hence the reason she told me last night before she left my house that she had quit drinking and smoking and was attending church regularly. I believe that to be a big fat lie. It just makes me mad that my friend is in Iraq and he is a good man and she is out on the town till all hours of the morning leaving her kid with me and my daughter with no regard for my life.
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
11 Feb 08
I try to surround myself with good people. Her husband is a good person and doesn't do things like that. I guess I was expecting the same out of her. I know better now!
