Practice courtesy on a daily basis
By ssh123
@ssh123 (31073)
India
February 15, 2008 8:58am CST
Are we foregetting the courtesies - genuinely expressed - by people because we are too busy all the time, because we are always tensed up due to pressure of work. Also it could be, we have not been taught properly at school or elsewhere, so we do not know the value of expressing courtesies.
It is very important that we practice it on everyday basis to ensure that it is expressed faithfully, sincerely, so that the receiver feels happy. You are always being watched and it is worthy of emulation by tens, hundreds, thousands and millions of people. This I feel is one of the greatest, simple legacy we can leave behind? What do you say my dear mylotian?
4 people like this
10 responses
@arkaf61 (10881)
• Canada
15 Feb 08
I am not so sure that we are forgetting courtesy or if people as a group are just disregarding it as not necessary and maybe not too realistic.
There is a tendency to view those small but very important tools to live peacefully in society as just "make up" some thing that people do but don't mean, or that is just not really a reflection of what the person feels.
I can understand this in a way. But although I can understand that a lot of people use those forms of courtesy automatically and without really thinking about them/ or often meaning them, I still think that they are important. They show that the person is making an effort to be a part of this great group which is being human and that he/she is using the tools that easy communication and peaceful living with others.
For many of us, this expressions are not just automatic, we mean them. ANd that is great.
SO what I think would be a great legacy to leave behind more than just going trough the motions would be to really, deeply care. But anything is a good start isn't it?
@JustinHe (6)
• China
16 Feb 08
After reading the content of this discussion, I felt there is really necessary to pay attention on the negative impact caused by the lack of courtesies in cotemporary society in China. China has a long history and a advanced civilization in ancient times. Unfortunately, because of the Great Culture Revolution happend during 1966 and 1976,all of the traditional Chinese courtesies are desterted. What happened in that decade are really unimagined, for example, teachers were beaten and reviled by their students, even children are told by officials to be their parents' enemies. The communalism notation of the class conflict directly lead to the bad courtesies condition in China. After the opening-up,people are busy with their individual business and the sense of using courtesies still have not came back into the soul of common citizen. There is still a long way for China to establish and recover the new culture of emphasizing courtesies from that disaster caused by the revolution. God bless China.
1 person likes this
@ssh123 (31073)
• India
20 Feb 08
You are right. The china what we knew is a country of great culture and tradition. As you said the revolutions have changed the man's perspective about the society. Concerted efforts should be made to restorate the old values. Thanks for giving us valuable insight into the happenings in China. It is an eye operner for other societies to be carefulablout such political set up which makes the parents to fight with their own children.
@ssh123 (31073)
• India
20 Feb 08
You are right. The china what we knew is a country of great culture and tradition. As you said the revolutions have changed the man's perspective about the society. Concerted efforts should be made to restorate the old values. Thanks for giving us valuable insight into the happenings in China. It is an eye operner for other societies to be carefulablout such political set up which makes the parents to fight with their own children.
@mimpi1911 (25464)
• India
16 Feb 08
Sada, This is a very pertinent post. I think courteousness has started to fade over years and in future it would become something very rare. Today, ppl are living on the edge, hardly stopping by to say hello or give a sweet smile. This is sad and this would not improve unless there's a mass awareness. I think, the children are not being aware of this things as the guardians hardly set good examples!
However, a little nice gesture can change the whole day. It's disarming and a feel good factor in today's tech world. I always try to practise this and it gets easier since I work in a hospital. However, I have found that good manners is often misunderstood as our weaknesses. Like when I talk softly and gently many think that I am being weak and would succumb to unsolicited favor that they want me do to.
Great discussion!
1 person likes this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
21 Feb 08
I agree with you on this one. It seems that there are many people who are forgetting that an attitude of gratitude, mutual respect and common courtesy are important attributes. Without that society can feel less 'civilized.'
Thankfully my mother was a VERY gracious woman I feel forever thankful that she was such a shining role model for me. Her legacy of courtesy is something I endeavor to do every day...in every way. Saying "please/thank you" to friends and stranger alike is something we need more of within the fast past of life today.
Good reminder..thanks for posting it.
Raia
@izathewzia (5134)
• Philippines
16 Feb 08
I agree with you. Courtesy should be first learned at home. And must be inculcated in school. So we will consciously practice it everyday. Because some unconsciously forget about it.
@cortney09 (1345)
• United States
16 Feb 08
I agree with you 100%. You rarely see people hold a door open for someone. I even saw a elderly women fall in the doorway of the doctors office, with two people sitting on the bench on the sidewalk outside and they just sat there while I helped her up. I used to work in a nursing home as a nursing assistant, so I new how to lift her. But these people sitting on the nearby bench were a good bit bigger in size compared to me. I thought how bad have we gotten that people don't do simple things like helping this women up. I don't know why a lot of people don't have common courtesy, but we should learn to have it.
1 person likes this
@cortney09 (1345)
• United States
25 Feb 08
I agree with that. I just think it boils down to not thinking about others.
@marilynlynn (994)
• United States
26 Feb 08
I agree with you.
What ever happened to people holding door's open for others?
Just saying good morning, or even acknowledging someone walking down the street.
I deal with this on a daily basis, and have a hard time with it.
I'm only 42 years old, but I'm kinda old school.
Great discussion, Ssh123. :o)
@Adoniah (7513)
• United States
16 Feb 08
Here in the States we have become so egocentric, that few people think of the other person unless they are personally involved with them in someway, such as related to them.
Common courtesy has basically gone out the window so to speak. People have little sayings like have a nice day and things like that that have no meaning whatsoever.
It is not just pressure at work or being too busy. It is that they do not care. Even those who were taught to be polite by their parents or Grandparents seem to put it away, and just bull through life and grab what they can get and forget the other guy.
It is a terrible example for each new generation that is coming up. They have no good examples to learn from. Very sad. It is not just here in the States either. It is in a lot of other countries too. I have seen it.
Shalom~Salaam~Peace
1 person likes this
@ssh123 (31073)
• India
16 Feb 08
Probably lack of time, hurry, and tension in job or business, these values are being not cared for. Why states, even in big cities like Bangalore in our country, people do not follow the basic courtesies. On the contrary, when I had been to states, I spent couple of months I found most of the citizen extended the courtesies and I picked up some there. Like your cars stop at zebra crossing, even if 1 pedestrian is waiting cross the road, they stop the car and ask us to cross over. You have revolving doors in most big buildings and doors are opened and they waited unit I went inside out outside. Whenever I wanted to know about a place, I always got information from general public. Why all these, New York taxi driver told me how much it costs to reach a destination + tips before I could board the taxi. It is was cent percent accurate. Even the airline staff understood my problem of broken suitcase and got a packing tape to wrap it safely the contents.
I believe that a few people have scant respect for public manners, public courtesies and majority of them are alright.
Thanks for giving a wonderful picture of what is happening as far as courtesy front is concerned. I very much appreciate the contents.
@AlwaysAskingWhy (96)
• United States
23 Feb 08
I agree. Everyone wants to be treated courteously. Therefore, if we treat others courteously, we set a good example. Unfortunately here in the US, discourtesy seems to be taught by the media as a virtue and is becoming the "norm" in American culture. Just watch all the reality TV shows that are popular in the US, such as American Idol. Simon Cowell is the rudest judge in that show. Yet he portrays his lack of courtesy as "honesty?" So many shows include characters that emulate that behavior. So it's not surprising when you walk the streets of any American city, that the people there are equally rude and quick to curse you or give you insulting gestures for any reason. I discovered that people are more polite in countries other than the US. It's no wonder American tourists get the bad reputation of being called "the ugly American."
