cheating, consequences
@lolalolacherrycola (899)
United States
February 17, 2008 2:12pm CST
Earlier this afternoon, I was watching as my 9 and 10 year olds were playing Pokemon Cards.
I saw my 10 year old take cards and hide them under his leg. I continued to watch, at first without saying anything, because I was doubting what I had seen at first.
After a short while, I changed positions and indeed he had 7-10 cards hidden under his leg and was cheating at the game.
I called him on it . He got very upset and threw his cards down and ran to his room whining.
I have thought in the past that he may have been cheating, but this time caught him red handed. I was upset and disturbed over it.
The 10 year old recently finished fourth place in an organized Pokemon Tournament and I was a bit shocked by it. Now I wonder if he cheated then as well.
What makes it a bit more difficult is that the 10 year old is my stepson, so it is always a bit more difficult to know if I am being fair or not.
What would you have done?
Thanks!
1 person likes this
8 responses
@lolalolacherrycola (899)
• United States
18 Feb 08
I also explained that to him. I prefaced our private conversation saying just that, If I told you right now that I have never cheated, I would be lying.
Thanks for the post!
@SukiSmiles (1991)
• United States
17 Feb 08
I would have called him on it as well. My son has a hard time losing and we have dealt with it before when he was younger. It took awhile, but he finally understood that winning by cheating gives you an empty feeling, no true feeling of accomplishment. As long as you try and do your best it's okay that you lose. Went through it with my daughter as well, she started because she wanted to beat her brother. What a cycle. You might also want to explain the conquences of cheating in an organized tournament. I assume that you would get kicked out, be embrassed, lose face infront of his peers, etc. I do think you were being fair. I would have done it if it was my child or someone elses.
1 person likes this
@lolalolacherrycola (899)
• United States
18 Feb 08
Thanks for your response. I feel better about it now.
@roberten (3128)
• United States
17 Feb 08
If possible I would have gotten a picture to prove he was cheating just incase something more developed out of the situation. I would have then called him on it but in a way that I would hope not have embarassed him. I would have ended the game by distracting them with something else. I would share info with his parent and leave it in their hand to discipline him.
1 person likes this
@lolalolacherrycola (899)
• United States
17 Feb 08
Thanks for your input. I will be telling his father about it. I talked to Noah about it privately, but got absolutely nowhere with it.
I didn't get a picture but when I walked to the other side of him, I saw the cards tucked under his leg and reached down and pulled them out and confronted him with it. There is absolutely no way he was not cheating, he had the evolved forms of the cards he held in his hand hidden under his leg to pull out when he needed them later in the game.
It is kind of funny, because the three of us played earlier in the week and he kicked our butts. A few days later, my son said to me, I don't know how he gets so lucky and gets all the evolved forms of Pokemon so easily.
Guess we know now...Sad but true...
@cynicalandoutspoken (4725)
• United States
17 Feb 08
I call my kids on cheating ALL the time. My 5 year old does it more than my 6 year old and it is always the same response. Cards thrown, and stomping off to their room whining they go.
I just recently called my 11 year old on throwing down a draw 4 in Uno on me when I knew she had a # 2 card in her hand (I knew cause I was cheating by looking at her cards reflecting in her glasses, but thats just me being observant) :)
She started to cry and when I asked her why, she said it was because she felt she had to cheat to try to beat me since she couldn't win any other way.
A whole lot of lessons were learned that night. I haven't caught her cheating since and while she still can't beat me at Uno he whoops up on me when we play rummy.
1 person likes this
@lolalolacherrycola (899)
• United States
17 Feb 08
Thanks for your input.
My stepson is learning disabled and has a difficult time with reading.
I did wonder if he did it because he thought that was the only way he would be able to win.
I just want him to realize it is wrong to cheat.
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
18 Feb 08
You said your stepson is learning disabled...that's a whack to the self esteem right there. He's not up with the other kids and probably feels pretty bad about himself. When he wins, he feels good. He's come out on top for once!
I think that you need to have a talk with him, not about the cheating but how he feels about himself. Does he ever wake up in the morning and feel like he can conquer the world? Or is it just another day of failure? Does he think he's stupid? Cos he's not! Your description of his cheating proves he's clever and able to think and plan ahead--those are ALL traits of successful people.
Please try to boost his opinion of himself. I think that's why he's cheating. It's the only way he knows to be king of the hill.
Hope everything turns out ok!
1 person likes this
@xXxMikesWifeyxXx (3072)
• United States
18 Feb 08
Haha you know, that is the same reaction every child gives for some reason when caught cheating LMAO i think its so funny i wonder though. whats the feeling at that time. embarrasment,anger, or anygry they just got caught with a litlte embarrasment ontop?.lol
all kids try the cheating thing. all u can do really is just try and talk and talk and talk and talk till their blue in the face and let them know that this is not a good thing to do and the consequences are bad,,,
