Gifts with conditions attached.

Gifts are just that and I don't believe that you can attach conditions to them. Did your ex actually carry out his threats to inspect etc? I must say that I have been very fortunate, I have never had anything like that happen to me. I hope that things are happier for you now.

That just seems odd to me. I have never received nor have I heard of a gift that had conditons attached. I dont think I would like that. I would not accept it.. I dont think.

I think I can honestly say that I never give a gift with conditions attached. I don't think I've received one like that either. That is awful! A gift should be a gift, that's it. Like you, I will tell the person that if they don't like it or if it is the wrong size, to feel free to return or exchange it.

No, I don't recall it happening to me, but I have heard people do it. Like when giving a gift to a child, I've heard people say- 'You have to share that with your sister.' That doesn't seem fair to me. Either get another one for the sister, or give it to both children to begin with. To me, attaching conditions means it's not really a gift. It's a way to be in control. I'm guessing a person who would attach such demands was also controlling in other ways. When I give gifts I say 'I hope you like it, but I've got the receipt just in case.' That way, I give the receipt and they don't have to feel bad if they return it, they don't even have to let me know whether they kept it or returned it.

doesnt sound so nice, cant remember if id recieved any gifts with conditions attached to. I also feel that it isnt nice to give people gifts with conditions attached, its like you want to give them something and still consider it you own thing.

No...I have never given a gift with a condition attached to it...and I wouldn't ever give a gift with any kind of attachment with it because when you give a gift you are suppose to give it because you want to and you want to see that person enjoy it...I wouldn't want a gift from someone with an attachment telling me how and where i could use it...

Except my mother sometimes, no one's ever given me a gift with condidtions attached. But I unconsciously have the conditions in my own head. I think I need to be careful with the gift and take good care of it (much more than things I've bought for myself) and it just drives my husband mad when I do it. I know it might be annoying but that's how my head is wired...I attach my own conditions to the gifts.

Now I am not saying this is your case, but some people work hard for their money and then give a gift and find the person only destroyed it. I have given gifts to people who destroyed the things I gave them and guess what they never got anything else from me, I have also given people money and told them to buy food with it or whatever they were complaining about, you know why, because they would ask for money for food and after giving them the money you find they went out partying or bought themselves an electronic piece or whatever, again these people would get nothing else from me. it is really nice to say a gift is unconditional but you know who looks out for the person giving the gift, who cares about all they may have gone through to sacrifice to give the gift. oh and by the way I do not want you to think that every gift I give has a condition attached, of course not, most gifts are not with reasonable people, where I can I like to give what I know the person would want and need, and sometimes I have come out and asked them what it would be, sometimes I have given them cash to buy what they want and sometimes I have given them the bill to exchange the gift it was not suitable for them. each case is different and depends on who and what you are dealing with. your husband sounds like he has no faith in your at all.

I have never given a gift with a condition attached to it. It is given from my heart and they can do what they want with it. I give it because I feel it will give them pleasure. But how can a gift give a person pleasure if you have to follow certain guide lines how the gift is going to be accepted. I would rather not have a gift if it has conditions to it because than it is not truly a gift. I have not had anyone give me a gift with any conditions on it either. I don't know the kind of personality I have soon the words were spoken of how to treat the gift I was given I think I would just hand it back and say no thanks I would rather you didn't give me anything if this is what you expect of me.

How annoying that would be. I have to admit though that my husband does that sort of thing to me but usually it's when he's bought me something like a camera and he's said "Please look after it honey, keep it in the case when you're not using it!" because he knows I am somewhat accident prone and tend to damage things quite easily. I would never give a gift and tell someone how or when to use it. If I'm even lending someone something I expect them to respect that they have to return it one piece and would not specifically say "be sure to take care of it and return it to me undamaged!" I would be too embarrassed that I'd offend someone - if they did damage it, I would make sure I never leant them anything again in the future.

That really does not sound nice at all. Could you tell him how that makes you feel? Do not think hat has ever happened to me. And I probably would remember.

If there is a condition.. Im not going to take it even if it is precious stone or whatever.

After reading your discussion, I have to say it seems your ex husband was very tasteless. I never received a gift from a friend or family member with conditions attatched to it, and if I was, I think I would have to politely say, "thanks but you can keep it, I can buy my own". Nor would I give a gift to someone with a condition attached to it, for that seems tacky. When one gives a gift it's suppose to be done with love, caring and warmth (from the heart). Just my opinion.

I've never heard of such a thing. Very controlling. I could see something like giving a video game or car to your kid and letting them know that it goes away if their grades slip, they get in trouble, etc. Beyond that, I think its nuts. Very, very controlling.

I love getting gifts. But the condition your husband is (sorry) ridiculous. all of my life is actually rare to got a gifts, but if someone give me a gift the never say the list of conditions. And that makes me more happyer. My mum and dad also trust me i can do anything and wear it anytime i want.For things that need responsible like motor bike, my father said to me : Din, i think you are responsible enough to have a bike, don't forget to wash it and be very careful when you ride it. But i don't have to wash it on monday, only monday, isn't it? I am a tiger(astrology) and i don't like to be controlled. For one person that give me a condition for his/ her gifts, i do like to respond spontaneously : is it the way you want to control me? because its seems that you give it because you want me to follows your rule.( with smile) I do like to see in the face how he/she respond back.

I have never heard of such a thing and sorry that you have had to go through that. Sounds very controlling to me. Not sure if he would of been around much longer if everything he gave me came with conditions. I would probably tell him to stick it.

No i never received a gifts with condition. For me gifts is a reward and kinda remembering of your importance. I guess your husband has a problem, I am really sorry for what i said.

Yes, my dear, been there, had it done to me! My ex-husband was exactly like that! I became a show piece for his gifts...I came to feel they were not a gift but just another possession he wanted, masked as a gift for me. This, partly, led to why he is an ex!

Yes I have but not like that. I wouldn't take a gift if it was given to me in that way. How rude. No, I was given a gift of money and told to spend it on something that I wanted and not bills which is a nice reason. I agree, when someone gives a gift it should be freely given with no conditions except for sweet ones such as I had described. When I give a gift it's definetly free of conditions.

i myself love giving gifts but i never attached any conditions in it. lol! it shouldn't be that way i think because, hey, it's your gift! it's given to you and the next thing to do with it is up to you. how bout doing it this way, what if you give him a gift attached with so many conditions? let's see what his reactions will be?