What is your reaction....

i had a similiar experience growing up. my sister and i look alike but thats where it stops. she has a vibrant personality and i was the quiet one. always living in her shadow. since i went to university, i got some self respect back.

I can understand what you are saying, and it is tough, my sister was the pretty one, I was the mouthy one, my sister was the nice one, I was the mouthy one. I spoke up for myself, see I was the more dominate of the two of us, and for the most part my sister and I had a good relationship. I did have more balance in that since I looked like mom's side of the family dad's side of the family disowned from the day I came home from the hospital, however my mother's attitude was you are treating both of my kids the same and if you can't then you don't need to be around them. Yet it still remained, with many family members. I was born with a natural sense of selfworth so I was lucky. However that constant comparison that finds you lacking can wear you down over time. My sister was the good one, I was the one who got into things I shouldn't. Hey I was curious. Unfortunately parents, and or other family members expect children to be whomever they are directed to be by the adults around them. Just because children are children and young, doesn't mean they are not individuals with some ideas traits and preverences of their own. No one in my family was a vegitarian my niece didn't eat meat, so we didn't force it. She does now, but it had never been a forced issue. In the case of my sister she and mom were so much alike it was hard for mom to understand why I was so different. She accepted me for this difference however there were times when she wondered why I couldn't be just like her and my sister. It is unfortunate that you did not have someone around to help balance things out for you, one person can make a difference, I had that one person in my grandmother. It is something that most people forget, that children are people, ok they are small people and have a lot to learn, but hey I have a lot to learn, unfortunately there has to often been those who have the care of children and do not realize they are not pet animals to sit, stay, heel, but individuals with minds, and perceptions. It is a shame that you had been hurt so, on the other hand you found the strength to turn it around, and you can take pride in knowing that whatever good you have made of you life you have done it on your own, though your own strength of character, which is a fine accomplishment, you could have just given up, and you didn't. It also gives you the chance through understanding what it is like to not have been treated right to turn it around and to always treat others with courtesy, and tolerance for their differences. You know one of life's greatest wisdoms, that your happiness comes from within yourself, and that is how you can then find it to be in balance with others. If you are not familiar with the George Benson song The Greatest Love Of All you may want to try to find it. one of the lines is "... no matter what they take from me, they can't take away my dignity..." even if you were lost for a while when you were younger, you know you found who you are and found value in that. Congrats it sounds like you found the greatest love of all. dessa

well...that not a good thing to do...there are different people in this world...and these are the people with whom we share the blood and in need they are the first people who ll come to help ....i will not do that in anyway....no matter how they are ...my siblings are unique to me...

Im sorry that you had to go through that. I kinda know the feeling. It wasnt as bad. But I try not to let it get to me. I know what I have and what they dont or whichever. My sisters have good qaulities but they also have bad. No one is perfect.

I had also experienced that. However, i take it as a challenge. As long as you do your best, you can be better than them. Each one of us is unique. Besides, we are the same in God's eye. If you think you do the right thing, go for it and be happy. Life is short! Make the most of it..

I can`t stand being compared to anyone. I don`t know what the point is to compare people anyway, will that change anything? If someone says to me that my sister is taller/more talented/prettier than me, would it automaticly make me taller? Prettier? More talented? No way. However it WOULD make me feel short, ugly and worthless. Why would anyone want to do that to someone? Why should you feel like you`re in a competition with yor brother or sister? I thoght the goal of any parents was to have their children love eachother and find support in eachother as they grow up, not to compeed... But that`s my opinion:)

No that has never happened to me as I am the first sibling, so my sister gets compared to me. You may think it is unfair, but the second sibling gets it easier if the first sibling is all great. My sister is aloud out a lot later than I was and is aloud more freedom and stuff like that.