Why do parents compare their children?
By m105508
@m105508 (59)
India
February 26, 2008 3:33am CST
I have bben through this till now n still its going on...
My parents always compare me with others children,they want me to be like them.But why cant they see the uniqueness in me.
What i can do thats totally impossible for those children.M a good Dj,a good dancer n a pro gamer...
My paents always compare me with other children for studies.No matter m not good in studies but i can earn my living doing other things such as Bieng a Dj in parties.
I dont want become a monkey wearing tie's n always saying "Yes BOSS".
Just hate that,all i want is...my parents to know what i am worth.I cannot become the one who i dont want to.Even i tried alot to study but i just cant manage m more intrested in other activities.I have earned online also still they say i cant live on my own i have be like Him/Her to achiee something.
WHat would have you done in you were in my place?
1 person likes this
6 responses
@ssh123 (31073)
• India
26 Feb 08
Comparing the child in front of other child is a social problem. All parents should keep in mind that this is going to develop an inferior quality, jealosy and sometimes even violence among the children. If they parents want to compare and discuss, let them do it among themselves. Never a child should be involved in the discussion.
This habit is really bad. Other children should not be condemned nor it is desirable to praise too much of other children in front of your children.
1 person likes this
@m105508 (59)
• India
26 Feb 08
yup thats right,why cant our parents see the brighter side of our's?
We have som much of other good qualities which many can only dream of but still they want us to be like them...why???cuz he has achieved something n we should achieve the same.
Never think that we can achieve something greater than them.
It surely drives me crazy sometimes.
I sometimes plan to leave my house n now i dont stay with my parents coz of it, m living with my granny its been almost an year.
I sometimes go n meet em but never prefer to live.
1 person likes this
@joyangz32 (322)
• Netherlands
26 Feb 08
If I were you. I will do what I want. In that way I can be happy with my life. Parents want their children to be successful. I think you need to prove to them that you can be successful in what you do. Take those things as a challenge.
Just follow you heart and soon you'll be successful.
@selby70 (283)
•
26 Feb 08
My parents always compared me and my sister she was the clever one I would make nothing of my life, well it has not worked out like that.And parents dont understand what they are doing when they do this, me and my sister have never got on because of this, I have 3 children and I hope I have not done that to them. Are they comparing you or just looking out for you I pushed my children to study and do well, but that was so that one day when maybe I am not here to take care of them, that they will be able to work earn money and look after themselves and have a good life. Good Luck
@m105508 (59)
• India
26 Feb 08
Hey thats really good.
You will surely prove to be a good parent n most important never compare your children amongst themselves.
Surely they will be proud of you when they grow up n will take care of themselves.
Seriously m still a kid but i have had enough of comparisons in my life.
its not that i may not support my parents but i prefer living away cuz of these comparisons.
1 person likes this
@authenticRebel (4)
• India
27 Feb 08
Parents commit the biggest mistake by comparin their child with oder children.It not only makes their child angry but also makes dem feel inferior to other children.They start feeling like they are not worth doing what they are doing. They get demotivated and dont feel confident.That effects their performance more, though the parents do it to improve the performance of their children but indirectly they are actually makin dem less confident..
Well i juz hope that we when we become parents ourself would keep this in mind n dont act the way our parents did..
@Elixiress (3878)
•
6 Jun 08
My parents did that saying how I could improve to be better than someone or achieve the best possible, but they also compared my friends to me and said to me how they were not good enough for me etc. The latter was worse than the former. At least with the former they were showing me that whatever I do in live I will have to compete, for a place in set 1, a place in college, a place in Uni, a place in the work place etc. But the later was just mean to others and rather unnecessary, they had many good qualities that they were just not aware of.
@jdyrj777 (6530)
• United States
6 Jun 08
Probably hard for them not to. But they should be doing that to you. Basic phycology tells you never openly compare children to each other.
