Stubborn teenager

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I have tried to be a cool mom. A friend to my daughter as well as a mother, unlike my own mother(a very backward meek woman) anyway..my daughter is 14 and yes, I remember that age and the 'I know everything' attitude. But I also knew respect for my parents and understood that what my father said went and 'bucking up' was not an option that would have gotten me anywhere. My daughters grades have been very disappointing to me send the end of last school year. She makes As Bs and Cs with one D, but this is no where near what she could do. She just refuses to put any additional effort into it. I've tried everything. Then we come to chores that it is a constant fight to get her to do. Punishments, rewarding, explaining in great detail-NONE of these things make a difference. And I grew up where discipline DOES NOT mean sit here and think about what you have done! I get SO aggravated with her 'Head being in the Clouds' constantly. She is so commonsenseless, for lack of a better word, irresponsible, and stubborn sometimes. Although, she says no one else things she is any of these things. As a teenager, I was not allowed to act any of those ways nor do I appreciate others seeing my daughter act this way. Not to mention I worry what's going to happen to her when the reality of the real world hits her. For the 3rd time, I have caught her with cigarettes, which she blames on me because I aggravate her. Anyone, with new suggestions that may help, I need to hear them.