My family does not like my boyfriend
By blush_blush
@blush_blush (307)
Philippines
March 7, 2008 1:08am CST
What would you do if your family doesn't like your boyfriend or girlfriend? Its because they don"t trust your boyfriend or girlfriend. Would you fight for him or her? How? Would you still continue the relationship? Thank You.
8 responses
@aowaow (1516)
• Indonesia
8 Mar 08
I don't know what your age is and what your culture in. The difference in age, teenage, mature, to adult ages makes parents will give a different scheme on giving the input for his/her kids. But with the loosen rules as soon as growing up session, so will the kids become different in choosing criteria.
What you need to consider is, is it worthy so to fight for him/her and sacrifice the parent's trust to you after these years they raise you in happiness/sadness.
If you really love him/her, you will need to be patience to gain parents' trust. Which is not be able bought in very brief time, if you are still in youth age. Along with the growing up n mature state, your perspectives and category in choosing lover will become different, you will expand and growing up the level into more good shape to form a family's life.
You will know at last that relationship is just not about love, it's about everything. When you are getting married, you will know the perspectives are different to each other, when you are teenage, when you are mature, and when you are older a bit in adult age.
Consider, use cold head to think over with. Don't let obsession, lust, or emotion strikes in and take control of everything. Good luck.
@blush_blush (307)
• Philippines
10 Mar 08
we're both working actually. I think the problem is in me. I'm always dependent on my parents, I also notice that every time I make a decisions I always run to them. I'm so attached.
@aowaow (1516)
• Indonesia
10 Mar 08
It's not wrong to ask an input from the older/our parent. If they are more democratic parent, they will let you to choose, the older you are, the better they will free the decision for you to decide.
Sometimes you will think they don't like him, but it isn't, sometimes the meaning is about "my daughter, you should be very careful before deciding that this is the one".
That's right, that's what we want to answer. But our answer is not what they expected for. Our answer contains pressure to them, which I mean the approaching word is using it wrong, but the core is right. So why don't you try to use a good word of approaching, "Don't worry mother/father, I know what I'm doing".
Never told them or use the word that he is the 100% guy, or I love him. Believe me, I had been there, it would be a blind argument to them. Using some kind of floater word will make your parents think you are more mature in their eyes. This is sample of my life. So if you really love this man, you will need to convince and make more approaching to your parents, especially if your guy can make the same approaching, parents will relax if he is capable of getting near to them. By the way, as natural as he can, don't get cocky if they caught him is setting the approaching up.
Parents' word contains a bit higher language, that sometimes we younger think it was, this is it! Parents' milk-bread experiences are better than our judgment. They yet ever been in your age too. Nobody is better than our parents, the blood is thicker than water.
Again, good luck in the approaching and convincing part in the future.
@youless (112570)
• Guangzhou, China
7 Mar 08
This is very difficult. I think it needs to know why your parents don't like your boyfriend. Are there any special reasons? If your parents find your boyfriend isn't good because of the characters like gambling, smoking etc. Then I think it's better to listen to your parents. If not, why not do something to make them change a mind?
@blush_blush (307)
• Philippines
7 Mar 08
I don't really know the reason why. They just don't like him. As far as I know, they expect someone who they can trust.
@fredgame (1260)
• China
7 Mar 08
Well, it's very difficult either to leave the girl or boy whom you love or go against the family. However, i'd demand reasons why they don't like the person and compare with the study i've personally done. if i realise that their reasons are not justified then i'll explain to them and ask them to do more observation for the good of us all. sometimes i heresay, cause someof these things when indeed they're false witnesses. you've to convince your parents to justifiy their conviction of that person. sometimes some people misjudge and later come to accept their mistakes. you can help them to know who he really is. if you know why they don't like him, depending on the reasons if your boyfriend can do amendments to get their favour. good luck.
@2btrueinu (700)
• Philippines
7 Mar 08
Hi! If you think your in the right age for serious relationship and you think he is right fighting for then go for it but be sure he deserve it. Think about it carefully before you do it your decision can change you relationship to your parents. Also ask their reason why they do not like your boyfriend maybe your too young for a serious relationship. Don't be in a hurry, don't push too hard. Are still studying maybe they are afraid you will not going to finish it. Take it easy honey everything will be fine... Happy posting.
@carinio98 (2929)
• Philippines
3 Apr 08
i think they like the one who is too rich, descent, kagalang galang kuno, nakasimangot na lang, serious, and most of all yes ng yes to all of your family has to say. thats the factor that you family want to a guy for you i too suffer for that in my early age whew and belive me im not happy on that like now. thats why i realize that they are not the one who have the relationship on your partner. it is you who love him/her trust, and always with. i must say fight for your loveones before its too late.
@DevilHands (573)
• Philippines
7 Mar 08
It really depends. If your guy is that gangsta type, then I would definitely side with your family, if he's nice but they don't like him by his race or status then do what you will and fight what you think is right.
@GreenMoo (11833)
•
7 Mar 08
I think I'd need to know why my family didn't like my chosen partner, and you've not told us enough in your post to be able to comment. i think we need to realise that our family do want the best for us, so if they dislike a partner it may be for a very good reason that we are not yet mature enough to recognise.
That's not always the case of course! Sometimes our parents make irrational decisions based on the strangest things, the same as we all do! They may just dislike someone because his / her 'face doesn't fit'.
