Discussion Stalkers Good or Worrying?
By Brian
@wolfie34 (26771)
United Kingdom
March 10, 2008 10:06am CST
If I find interesting discussions by one person then I will go through all their discussions and respond to them, but what suddenly struck me yesterday was what if they think I am stalking them? What if they become uncomfortable because they fear the only reason why I am responding to them and becoming obsessive with their discussions is because I am interested in them more than a friend?
That is the last thing I'd want to do, but when I see interesting discussions I just want to answer them and when a person has got about six or more discussions and I start replying to them, do they feel that I am chasing them or making a nuisance of myself?
What do you think? If someone started responding to really old discussions of yours which are a month old do you start to wonder why they are doing it?
Are you flattered, or are you interested why they are doing it, what motive do they have?
Are you wary they may be stalking you in some way, after all why dig up discussions which are older than a month? And not just one but lots of them!
Am I being paranoid or worrying too much? I don't want anyone on Mylot thinking that I taking an over interest in them or being a pest
29 people like this
69 responses
@foxyfire33 (10005)
• United States
10 Mar 08
Sounds to me like you are the kind of mylotter most of us appreciate. I'm assuming you leave quality responses so that is definitely not stalking or being a nuissance!
If you were going around leaving multiple negative responses and rude comments on a person's discussion or reporting that one person no matter what they did, then it would be a big problem. You don't seem to be the type to do that though.
I have had a few 'chasers' since being here and I never thought they were interested as more than a friend...at least not seriously, maybe in a fun. flirty way but that's different. What I really assumed when they answered multiple discussions was that they were truly interested in my life and what I had to say about issues. To me that is comforting and flattering!
6 people like this
@weemam (13372)
•
10 Mar 08
stop worrying sweetheart , If it were me I would be flattered , I would never for a minute think you or anyone else was stalking me , When I see more than one response I think "well they must like the way I write about my family or the fun things we get up too " take care pal xx
6 people like this
@TerryZ (22076)
• United States
10 Mar 08
Oh you silly wolf!LOL No I wouldnt think like that at all. If I find someones discussions interesting I do the same thing. When someone responds to alot of discussions I think they are trying to be my friend thats all. So I think your being alittle paranoid my friend. And your not a pest.LOL xxxx
5 people like this
@howard96h (11640)
• New York, New York
10 Mar 08
Oh no wolfie, don't think that. The whole purpose is to try and comment on all the discussions out there and when you find some good ones even if it's the same person go right ahead and answer them. The points are made and both benefit. Ah come on, who can blame good ol' wolfie for stalking? hahaha
5 people like this
@kbourgerie (8780)
• United States
10 Mar 08
Oh Wolfie, you are a big galoot and that is meant in the kindest of ways. I am flattered when someone takes enough interest in me to reply to my posts. I only would consider someone somewhat a problem if they left remarks that were too challenging or unkind. You certainly do not fill that bill. Maybe I'm naive, but I don't think I'd know a stalker if they came up and said, "Hello, I'm a stalker, do you mind if I stalk you?", but I do know that if you said that, I'd probably just laugh.
5 people like this
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
10 Mar 08
Do I get a medal for being a big galoot? Love that word. Hello my friend I am a stalker, go on laugh, I feel better today after my Black Sunday, I've got mum's 65th to look forward to tomorrow so that has put a smile on my stalking face ;0) (thanks again for caring x)
5 people like this
@kbourgerie (8780)
• United States
10 Mar 08
I'm really glad to hear you are feeling better. I can hear you smiling, you are awful loud with it. LOL. Well, but then maybe thats what stalkers do. Have fun with your Mum's birthday and when you finished come over and stalk me some more.
4 people like this
@LauraElrod (418)
• United States
10 Mar 08
hi my friend u can come to my page as much as u like i like reading things u post even though i don't alway have a comment i enjoy your friendship. don't worried is there a block key here if someone feels strange about u, have a great day
5 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
10 Mar 08
Wolfie I would never think anything of it and if someone does then they are silly
The only time I would wonder is if they where being rude, nasty or weird
So no Sweetheart it would not bother me and I have done it in the past and sometimes do it now
@Darkwing (21583)
•
10 Mar 08
No, I don't worry about it as long as the responses are polite and respect your discussions. I don't think many people would regard you as a stalker unless you said something untoward to them.
Indeed, I'm flattered if somebody is following my discussions, and responding in a constructive way. I can handle that!
I don't think you have anything to worry about, my friend, and if they think you're stalking them, they will approach you to that effect.
Brightest Blessings.
@suspenseful (40192)
• Canada
10 Mar 08
I am rather glad when someone replies to an old discussion (more for me, ha, ha!) and I really do not worry about stalkers. I think you can tell stalkers by the responses they make to your posts, that they insult you, call you names, write obscene remarks on their responses, and soon after, you see your star going down.
Now if I go and respond to one person's posts more often than necessary is is for two reasons: One, I requested him or her as a friend and he or she thinks I am not interested in his or her discussions to be considered as a friend, so he or she had me pending for some time. Or two: I read one of the discussions and find he or she are of similar minds, and have a similar subject that I love.
4 people like this
@Debs_place (10520)
• United States
10 Mar 08
If they respond positively they would not be stalkers. The person who is a stalker is the one who reports abuse when there is none, who selects a - to rate a respond or who puts in nasty responses.
3 people like this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
10 Mar 08
Lol, Wolfie.
Generally speaking, I doubt your "kind" intentions will be misconstrued.
I do the same myself when I make a new friend and have time. Or just when I have time and am looking for discussions to answer.
Similarly as I have "stalked" others, others have "stalked" me in the way you described too. It is no biggie really.
If people follow you and kept talking negative things, then that is really stalking-harassing.:P
@worldwise1 (14885)
• United States
10 Mar 08
Strangely, wolfie, I have thought of the same scenario. I will often do the exact same thing; find a person who submits really good discussions, and then respond to as many of them as I can. I find nothing wrong with this and I would certainly hope the person would not think I had an ulterior motive in doing so. I've learned that people can be so quirky, however, that it is hard to know how they will react. I consider it a way of making friends -but maybe not everyone does.
4 people like this
@tinamwhite (3252)
• United States
10 Mar 08
You are just tooo precious for words, Wolfie...
I have had several people in the past read one of my responses and then go back and respond to very old discussions of mine...I was not concerned by it...rather flattering I think...
Anyone who has read your posts knows that you are just a big ole'loveabale teddy bear in wolf's clothing...do not worry, my friend...you just are not the suspecious type!!
Love ya...
Tina
4 people like this
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
10 Mar 08
I like that, teddy bear LOL! I guess I am, too placid, too malleable and always worrying what others think of me, I guess that's not always good because I come over vulnerable and people who are vulnerable are easily bullied. I hope you are ok my dear friend xx
2 people like this
@Aussies2007 (5336)
• Australia
11 Mar 08
This has happened twice to me here so far...
Why are you answering all my questions?
Are you stalking me?
People can be very strange when they don't use their brain to think.
The whole point of having friends on myLot is to have someone answering your questions.
Confusing... is it not?
@sid556 (30959)
• United States
10 Mar 08
I don't know how others here feel but for me, if the person were friendly, I would be ok with it. I would not look at it as stalking at all. I think if someone were following me around and being very rude, then I might have a problem with it. When we post things on here, we are looking for responses so how could you possibly be a pest? Even if it were an old discussion, I would be very ok with you responding to it....why not?
3 people like this
@bfarrier1 (2082)
• United States
11 Mar 08
I don't think your being paranoid I do this myself,I have responded to discussions that are older than a month if it interest me,since I am fairly new here I always think it would be nice to get more response from the discussions I have started but they are quit old so maybe thats why there was not much response.Don't worry so much your here to have fun,have a great day!
2 people like this
@gemini_rose (16264)
•
11 Mar 08
Nah it wouldnt bother me, thats what its all about from my point of view, I guess maybe some might get a bit paranoid, but not many. Im sure you are not a pest wolfie34 its very good of you to take the time to answer older discussions and it doesnt bother me one little bit.
