I need your help.....................

Tough situation. Perhaps the military or military school. It's not for everyone, but maybe he needs some structure and discipline. And perhapsm,using some tough love, when he turns 18 you should kick him out of the house. It's definately not a good environment for your 12 and 13 year old sons. Or perhaps force him (somehow) to see a therapist even though he doesn't want to. I hope everything works out for you.

linda4you, iI feelyour pain, but the lad is going to have to want help, before anything, can be done for the boy... have you heard of tough love??? know this in your heart that he will blame everyone but himself when, the choices he makes, get him in trouble with the law. check into A/A and narconon . also Alanon.

when i was that age i did it and my mom did it, but i would kick him out b/c thats what i would of needed then, i would also spank him, LOL i know hes 17 and might laugh his butt off with it doesnt hurt, but its those moments you remember when your older, i remember when my mom kicked my azz b/c i was being oh so stupid.

I am not sure that I would kick him out right away BUT I would definitely sit him down and discuss the issue with him and explain how you feel about it. I understand how hard it is to lose a child and think that if you try to talk to him about this it may help. It's a personal judgment call. Do you think that he will abide by what you feel? I f you think that he might then it is worth trying and that wasy you do not lose any kids. I would set the rule though that if this happened again what the repercussions would be! I hope this helps.

I have asked myself this question over and over again, about what I would do if I was ever in this situation, my husband and I have also talked about what we would both do, and we both have said that we would have to be cruel to be kind because you can only put up with so much, and you should only have to put up with so much. Always we have that thing inside us that says but they are our children, but the more you put up with from children then the more they will walk all over you and I have always said that I am not going to let my children rule my life when they are older and make whats left of mine miserable. I have a 16 year old and he is not into smoking or anything but he can be arrogant, he can have an attitude and he aggravates his younger siblings sometimes to the point where I want to strangle him. I always remind him that he is coming to the age now where I dont have to put up with it anymore, and I am not obligated to him after a certain age. He is your son and you love him but by doing this he is taking advantage of the fact that you are his parent and he thinks you will always tolerate it. But if you have tried talking to him and you have tried everything else then the only other option is to show him whose boss and put him out, its finding that wake up call to make him realise that its your house and your rules and hes overstepping the mark.

I would talk to him first,if he didn't listen I will kick his azz out if that's what I have to do.I can't imagine a 17 year old boy gets high,that's not normal in my coutry.I tink you shoul get him to the hospital,lock him up force him to get clean. I dropped out of my college,cause I am bored with it.It dose mean I don't want to learn.But it really drove my parents crazy,they didn't understand me,they just think I was against their wishes. See if you can have communicate with him,ask what is he going to do with his life.He must take responbility for himself.Child at that age is rebel,maybe you can try to stand on his side,try to figure what he is think,then you may help him

Listen to your head and kick him out! As a high school teacher, I see this quite often. If he is not willing to follow your house rules and attend school then its time to go! He dropped out of school right before he would have graduated...time for tough love...OUT he goes. You also need to think about the two younger children.

I would talk to him first,if he didn't listen I will kick his azz out if that's what I have to do.I can't imagine a 17 year old boy gets high,that's not normal in my coutry.I tink you shoul get him to the hospital,lock him up force him to get clean. I dropped out of my college,cause I am bored with it.It dose mean I don't want to learn.But it really drove my parents crazy,they didn't understand me,they just think I was against their wishes. See if you can have communicate with him,ask what is he going to do with his life.He must take responbility for himself.Child at that age is rebel,maybe you can try to stand on his side,try to figure what he is think,then you may help him