Screaming toddlers

United States
March 18, 2008 1:45pm CST
I have a one year old at home with me all day and she isnt talking yet and she goes into these fits of screaming and there is almost no stopping her. Doctors say this is normal, yet i cant find many one year olds who do this. Anyne out there have an opinion or something that might help me calm her down?
5 responses
• United States
19 Mar 08
I would think that the first step is to try and figure out what sets it off. Is there a particular activity that precludes the screaming? All children are different, but this does sound a bit extreme and merits looking further into it. She could be seeking attention and you may have to give her a time out along in her room and tell her "I will not talk to you when you scream, when you calm down, we can spend time together again." Good luck, your nerves must be frayed at this point. I feel for you.
• United States
19 Mar 08
I just had a thought that she may be displaying some characteristics of being autistic. You may want to check into this as well. Perhaps it is time for a new pediatrician and a second opinion.
• United States
19 Mar 08
nerves are beyond frayed. it doesnt help that i'm pregnant as well so her screaming can only make the headaches worse. time outs work occasionally shes just a very needy child. i'v looked into the autism and they say she doesnt have characteristics but it is something we are still watching out for.
@Sillychick (3275)
• United States
18 Mar 08
Try to figure out what she wants, then help her communicate that with you. My son, who is 18 months old, was doing that about a month ago. He would just stand there and cry and whine, or lay on the floor. I started asking him what he wants. I would say 'tell me what you want.' If that didn't work, I said 'show me.' Sometimes it was a guessing game, until I was able to figure out what he wanted. Then when I did I would tell him to 'use words.' I would tell him what to say 'juice please.' If it was something he couldn't say, he would just make a noise or gesture, but the crying stopped. This will not work the first time, but give it a week or two and you will start to notice a difference. Continue to repeat the words to her and soon she will start saying them. In the meantime, gestures will work. A lot of people underestimate children and think that at this age the screaming is what they do and there is nothing you can do until they outgrow it. It is true that it is normal for the age, but they will get past it more quickly and easily if you help them learn to communicate their needs with you. After a month of doing this constantly with my son, he hardly ever cries or whines for the little things he wants. He either tells me by saying the words-'up,' 'juice,' or he makes gestures and leads me in the right direction. Your daughter will get there, but you need to lead the way.
• United States
19 Mar 08
I'v tried asking her to show me what she wants and it seems to help a bit. thanks for the tip
@reeseyj (906)
• United States
18 Mar 08
Well first its not normal. Kids do this because it works at getting attention. Trying to calm her down is attention. When she has a fit she should be left alone and when she is completly done with her fit then you should give her attention. Never give in to child because you will lose their respect. When a child has a home with rules,love and structure they do just fine and no fits.
@jimbelle (485)
• Philippines
18 Mar 08
Most pediatrician would say it is normal even up to 2 to 3 years of age. You will be able to minimize screaming if you would try to understand what she likes and needs. Their is always a reason why she does that. She may be hungry or she needs something but was not able to get it. If she start screaming leave her until she calms down and try to talk to her if she has stopped screaming. Now she is one year old and she will not be able to communicate her needs. Things will be better if she gets older- then you will be able to talk to her and ask her what she likes. Children will outgrow the tantrums early if you show them how much you care and love them.
@gemini_rose (16264)
18 Mar 08
All mine have had tantrums at that age, mainly because they do not know how to communicate their needs, they also get frustrated and so that is how they let you know. I hate it when they have tantrums and so I would ignore them until they had done and not speak to them at all until they got it out of their system or I would distract them by playing silly games, doing all the silly things that would normally make them laugh. I would do it then until they forget that they have been having a tantrum. If you get cross with them when they are doing it, it only makes them worse, same as speaking to them can sometimes make them worse. Hope you find a way to get her out of it!