young parents

i think this young mom needs to have be scolded by you since they are are your responsibilities now that they are in your care. may i ask what is your stepson's view about his wife's attitude? she must concentrate at least with her child if she is not working or studying. if she is not helping with the house chores, then she must be a fulltime mom to hr baby at least. right now, i am cuddling my 7 month old baby that's why i just type without considering what needs to be capitalize hehe i got pregnant when I was only 19 but I have to be mature enough because my mom is not with me, not even my mother-in-law.

i think the beating around the bush approach never really works. if you think there is something she should be doing now that she is a young new mom, then you need to tell her just that. don't sugar coat it. let her know straight out, honey i think you need to spend more time with your daughter. hold her when she cries, sing to her, talk to her while looking in her eyes. don't drop hints people never get those. just tell her the honest truth. you don't have to be nasty but you always have to be honest

Come down hard on her... lock the internet connection... Or lock the computer with a password... it's her kid... if you can't take it any longer, let her know its time to be a mom... or she can leave the baby and get out of your house... it's what i would do if i were you... she gave birth to the baby, she better take care of her... no point you being nice to her when she isn't getting any of your hints... even if you tell her nicely, nothing will get through to her.

That is actually worrying,maybe she is too young to be a mother.I always think I am a child now.My aunt with the same situation like you,and she takes care of the little baby.I think you can tell your stepson what you think,perhaps it is helpful.

Well, she's only 17, and at her age, we cannot expect her to take the responsibilities of being a parent that easily. It would take time...just guide her through it since she's staying there with you. I understand, though that it is kinda bothersome sometimes to see her attitude towards being a mother to your grandson.

first of all let me say...trinity ann is beautiful....I have been here and i feel you....it's very hard,depending on the person you're trying to help understand,my daughter just got ugly with me and thought i was trying to "butt in"or mind her business,or trying to say she was a bad parent...so you have to be careful....but you also have to tell her....don't sit there day in and day out making yourself sick over it.That is what i did for so long....kept it all in for fear of her leaving and taking the babies away from me...which she did,after i let out my feelings.You only make yourself sick....my daughter had to find out the hard way,what i was trying to do in helping her.Now,she understands,and is doing well.If there is a support group there for young mothers,i think this would be great for her!My daughter got counseling and i couldn't belive the difference it made.Good Luck

Not trying to give her reasons for what she is doing but has she seen the doctor about post portum depression? Some of the symptoms is distancing one self from the baby when this happens. I was a young mother too, had my son in my teen years as well. First i would say the father of the baby is he is your son? It may be taken better by her if the father of the child approaches her about this issue instead of someone else. Thats if shes on good terms with the father. If shes on the computer when the baby wakes up you could also try going and picking up the baby and than taking the baby to her. Tell her I was trying to help you out but the baby really wants you. In the end though if she doesn't get your subtle hints that you will need to say something to her straight out. Because when it comes down to it that baby really needs her. And if she gets mad at you than oh well let her, she'll get glad again.

I'm not that young anymore, I'll be 25 soon. I have a child who will be 6 months. I feed my child, take care of him but I'm not the type of person that will give his bottle and hold it. I put something under the bottle so it can be hold, but I stay in the room with him (I'm probably fixing something or cleaning)When my baby was a newborn I didn't carry him or try to hold him in my arms or slept with him. Now that he is 6 months, I play with him, read books, I talk to him but I'm not the lovey dovey kind. My mom always calls my attention that I should caress him, hug him that when I put him to sleep to stroke his hair with my fingers. I always say no and my excuse his he will get use to it and he will never learn to sleep on his own. I guess what I'm trying to say is every mom is different, plus she is the one with the weight on her shoulder and probably doesn't know how to deal with it.

Cangratulations!What a lovely baby! Yes,there is a problem is that the young parents always don't know or don't want to take care of their babies.No matter what you tell them,there is no use.So I think you should just keep silence and help her as much as possible.

Maybe try to spend time with her and the baby as a three, she may appreciate the fact you will be helping more than her own mum. Arrange a few days out to go to the park or a little playcentre, even if Trinity can't walk yet I'm sure she will love looking at other children playing!! Its hard not to get distracted tho by computers and friends etc... I personally am 23 with a 1yr old who keep me very much on my toes. As babies grow you have less time to yourself anyway because you have to permanantly be on watch. When baby gets to 6 months she will soon have to start putting the hard work in to start weaning her onto food. You don't want her slacking behind from a non intrested mother. Get your son to be more involved and to treat his girlfriend and baby as his family, he should hopefully be helping as and when he can. Hope you get it sorted, its an awful shame for a Pc to be more important that her baby girl.

i dont think there is a gentle way of making this girl realize shes neglecting her baby. unfortunately, alot of people, young or old, arent really aware of what it takes to be a good parent. ive seen some 16 year olds be more attentive and loving and wonderful mothers, and some 35 year olds who will mix whiskey in with their babies formula so they dont wake up middle of the night and bother them. wisdom isnt necessarilly condusive with age in years. from the sounds of it, youve tried to gently nudge this girl into the right direction and shes ignoring you, so you may want to be more blunt in your approach.

This is going to be super hard. STOP HELPING HER! I was 19 when I had my daughter and because of complications my baby was ready for our new life before I was and during the first little while I relied heavily on my mother for help with the baby. However there is a certain point where you have to let her learn on her own, see if it works for a bit. If it doesnt speak with her alone. Explain that you only want to help her be the mother you know she can be, give her small tips then, say something like I noticed you get frustrated when the baby doesnt sleep at night....maybe if we had a play time where the baby is on a blanket on the floor with you and toys it will wear her out. Talk about it being good bonding time for her and the baby, also explain that maybe a calming bath before bed would help both of them. Most of all explain that you want her in your home and want for HER to be the best mother she can be. However I am now 23 and am raising my daughter by myself and I still dont have the hang of everything my title of a mother requires. It will take her time to pick it up too. I still cant keep a real clean house, work full time, go to school full time and take care of my daughter by myself. I have help watching her by my mother but only during times I am at school or work, otherwise I have to pay her extra to babysit if i want to go do fun things. My little sister comes over and helps me clean the house once a week (of course i pay her too) bottom line is she is young, it will take time, practice and some guidence. Sense she doesnt have her own mother to help her learn these things she needs someone to teach her. It sounds to me that you are willing to teach her, you just need to find a non-threatening way to go about it. Good luck to you and when she finally gets used to it im sure she will thank you for your help. I know I would have been lost without my own mother