I had my daughter and her family live with me for 9 months...I need to vent
By Loverbear
@Loverbear (4918)
United States
March 22, 2008 5:11pm CST
I had my daughter, son in law, his uncle, and my two grand daughters live with me for the past nine months. There is so much that happened that was horrible and I really need to vent what went on. I know that I should direct this at my daughter but she wouldn't read the letter all the way through. I am still cleaning up the mess from them(the bedroom they stayed in stinks!)and yesterday I found that one of the antiques that came from my mother's estate has been vandalized. It was a beautiful maple dough box table, mind you "IT WAS". My grand daughters aged 9 and 12 (now 13) took some thing sharp and gouged the daylights out of the finish. Not only did they do it on top of the table but also under the lid and on the sides. It's going to cost a fortune to get it fixed. When I let them use the table in the bedroom I told them how valuable it was to me. I sat and cried over it.
Should I go ahead and vent myself on MyLot? I realize that it might help others to not make the same mistake I did and let their family come home for a "few days". When my Mother died the kids stayed with me for three weeks and it cost me over $3,000. They stayed with me again in 2004-05 (they left when I ran out of propane. It took me three years to save enough to get propane. I am on a very limited budget)and that time it cost me $6,500. This time they stayed until I packed their stuff and moved them out. It cost me $12,000! I did finally learn something--but I still have a lot to get out of my system. My daughter knows my MyLot name so she will know who is talking about her; but at this point I don't care anymore. I have been used and abused and am sick about it. Would you post to get rid of the awfulness you have pent up inside?
2 responses
@dreamy1 (3811)
• United States
22 Mar 08
Since your daughter might read this I will say to her, SHAME ON YOU. How dare you take advantage of your mother and trash her house? Let your children run wild and stink up the place? When you are staying in someone else's house you should be on you best behavior. You should help out in any way you can and clean up the messes you make. You are not a child you should know better. How trifling. You need to pay your mother for the destruction you caused.. Don't ever even fix your mouth to ask for anything from your mother again because you don't deserve it.
1 person likes this
@Loverbear (4918)
• United States
23 Mar 08
Thank you for your post! I was raised to treat other people's belongings with respect and to treat people how I would want to be treated only better. After I posted the discussion I went back into the bedroom to finish removing the wall paper that their cats peed on. I not only have to remove the wall paper but the carpet needs to be replaced too. I told the grand daughters that the only way they could have their cat in the bedroom at night was to have a litter box in there too (there is a bathroom in that bedroom). Of course they didn't comply and then complained to me that MY cats got into their bedroom and peed on the bedding. (Not to gag you too badly, but they didn't change the sheets as far as I know...ICK!!!)
I will be posting a discussion later in the morning, kind of a letter to my daughter about what went on and the hurt they caused. Thanks to the MyLot members that posted to my discussion I have the courage to do the next discussion. It is Spring and Easter, a time of rebirth and I need to get the poison of having the kids stay with me and go on with my life-with or without family. Thank you for the support and the shot of courage.
@whywiki (6066)
• Canada
22 Mar 08
What better place to vent than mylot. We all have problems and even if we get no replies at least we got it off our chests. The bonus is if she reads it and sees how much she has hurt you and tries to change her ways. I miss my mom now that she has passed and I would sure hate to see your daughter go through life not realizing how lucky she is to have such a great mom. I hope it all works out in the end.
@Loverbear (4918)
• United States
23 Mar 08
Thank you for your reply. I sat and did a lot of thinking before I decided to go ahead and vent all that went on with the "family". I decided that there wasn't anything that my daughter could do that would hurt me any more than what went on in my house for the 9 months. I will be posting the "discussion" later in the morning. It was the replies that the people posted here on MyLot that helped me make the decision, plus it is Spring and Easter, both are symbolic of a rebirth and that is what I intend to do.
My daughter uses the grand daughters as a weapon to get what she wants. If you don't do what she wants she informs you that you won't get to see the grand daughters again. As much as I still love my daughter, right now with the treatment I received it wouldn't be much loss to not see them.
Thank you for your answer and giving me the courage to continue with the discussion.
