In A Serious Relationship Or Marriage, Do You Think You Should Have The Rights..

I do not have the right to read my husband's mail. Mind you, he leaves it open sometimes so I can read it, and he also gives it to me to shred instead of shredding it myself. HE does not do any texting, being a one finger typist and he does not have a cell phone. I do not tell him what I am getting. He does not open my mail, nor do I his. And if it is addressed to the both of us, he opens it.

I am unhappy to say NO I do not have the trust you have in my marriage.I love my husband and want to trust him but he keeps letting me down.I have been through a lot with him but I still try anyway.I do not see every text or email for that matter.I don't even have the time to keep that much check on another person with 2 small kids to raise and a house to keep going.I do believe in any relationship a person needs some privacy to him or her self.If the other person thinks cheating is going on then their is good reason to want to know about the secret emails or text.I mean you have got to have trust but atthe same time if you think something is going on and they will not be truthful then it's time to demand some answers.

I think that it is a trust thing. We have one common e mail address but everything else is separate. I was always brought up not to look in a lady's handbag and I see my wife's computer use as being something similar. Sometimes we show each other things, but generally we lead separate computer lives.

Here is where i like to use the "do unto others as you would have them do unto you"!would you like your husband checking all your e mails?text mess etc? because how would you decide which ones to check or not?this is a can of worms you don't want to open up!my other obvious question would be, where is the trust that all good relationship is based on?i think it is important to say to your partner "i trust you,honey but is there anything you want to tell me?or talk about?"that way you are allowing him to come forward on his own,without accusing him of cheating,or suspection!and if he still does not admit to anything then you now have the right to decide if you want to go on with this relationship!if you feel the need to check his e mails or texts well i am afraid its the beginning of the end and you need a exit plan!i myself never let my lady check my e mails or texts or do i check hers we operate on a innocent until proven guilty type frame of mind!i do get texts from other ladies but i tell them that i have no intention of breaking up with my woman,so just talk no boonga boonga!

I think there should definitely be an element of privacy between partners but there should not be secrecy either. I think it's ok to occasionally see an email that he has gotten or whatever. If there's nothing to hide, then he shouldn't have to worry about it and vice versa. Afterall, you are a couple and there is no reason why these things should have to be kept exclusively to oneself.

Well Rose...theres a difference between us here...hubby doesnt have a mailbox....and he doesnt text!!!!...but lol i may say i would have to have a little peek!!! But really if you dont trust each other to somwe extent it would make life very uncomfortable..it would be like being smothered!!!! Hubby is quite welcome to view my mail box..he maybe wouldnt understand that the emails concerning Viagra etc werent sent for by me!!!...but thats spam for you!!! If he could make out how my phone works...he can look at my texts too!!...

In my Marriage I didn't and he was lucky I had no Idea how to work a Computer, but my Son told me years later, after I got divorced that he had seen what his Dad was up to I knew anyway In my Relationship I fully respect the Privacy and I trust him fully It took him a long time to get rid of my Fears but he managed it and he is the first Man I trust as much as I do

I think there should be a balance, I think a spouse has the right because if you are writing on the internet emails etc, that is still a public forum, I think a spouse has the right to see any email he or she wants and if there is no funny business the partner has nothing to worry about, and I do think a spouse has the right to privacy, the partner should not be reading every single email and watching every move of the spouse, it is just not healthy more like jail.

I believe that partners in a marriage should be allowed complete privacy and that their emails, texts, or an actual old fashioned diary should be completely private unless the one WANTS to share it all with their partner. I know someone who goes in and reads all her husbands emails and his responses and checks the webpages that he's visited too and I think that is just sick and makes a mockery of what marriage is all about!

To me trust is never in my dictionary when it comes to relationships.I would like to see whatever messages you have.Do every thing to know about your private life.But it ends there.I cant make any problem out of all that.But what i do know is that, i dont trust you but you dont know it cos i wount let u know.Another thing i do know is that no matter the kind of partner you have, u must never trust him/her.Things might change i the next few seconds for bad.So never u trust no body except for your self.your partner might be cheating on you and you will never know it believe it or not.Because they like what they have with you and wouldn't want to spoil it.

I read all the responses to your question. I WISH I trusted my SO the way these people do. My bf has been unfaithful to my thru out our 21 year relationship. We have separate email accounts but like one of your responders he let me use his computer when mine was down and his email was up. I snooped and found out ALL kinds of things about him. I had a friend of mine rig it so a copy of his emails come to me. Sometimes I wished that I wasn't able to see his email. I am trying to get myself healthy (I have ms) so that I can get back on my feet and get free of this relationship. It is clear to me that he is incapable of being honest and that I will never be enuf for him (which is hurtful since I spent alot of years financially supporting him when I was able to work).

Hey Gemini_Rose, By knowing those stuff ..you are always taking/asking for trouble... i never gives you the peace, u guys wont be happier.. and try to give more time to your husband to tell you by himself rather then you asking then slowly you will start fighting... then you both wont be 2 happy together...so i would say leave it dont care about emails/ text messages just focus on your relationship, make sure he/she is giving you the best love ever b4u.. My own experience says that never ever look into there emails/text messages.. Negative thoughts just flood into your mind..& moreover it just disturb your relationship .. very badly.. take care bye Kethavat Kotesh

I always trusted my husband one hundred percent as he trusted me and we never went through each others mail. If we wanted to share something we would tell each other and share that.otherwise our mail was out own business.

My husband and I share everything. He knows all my passwords as I know all of his. this is our way of trust. We see it as if we had something to hide then we wouldnt give each other our passwords. He always looks at my stuff I look at his. We both have nothing to hide. I joke with him when he recieves things from his exgirlfriend because they have a son together lol. It gives him a laugh. We both have our privacy though. Our relaionship is on 100000% trust.

When I was married, I would not have even dreamed of looking through his email or text messages or even snail mail. I didn't want him doing it to me and I certainly respected his right to privacy. It ended up that I was respecting him a lot more than he was respecting me so, divorce happened for us [there were LOTS of other reasons too].

we have our access on each other's account..but,i will only open and read his inbox if he will ask me to do so!!!about his phone, sometimes he will ask me to receive the call or read the txt!!!

I don't think so. I don't read his texts or e-mails, and wouldn't let him do the same to me, even though the content has no impact on our relationship. we each need some privacy. I want to have my internet privacy, and as such allow him the same.

This is a touchy area for some people! I don't think you have the right to anything although with my other half and I we just assume it is ok as neither of us minds the other one knowing what emails/texts etc we get but I know some people would hate if their other half looked at any kind of message they got! I guess different things work for different couples but in my opinion that is not an automatic right! xxx

I've been married to my husband for 12 years now. I don't read his email and he stays out of mine. That being said, we will frequently call each other and say "can you check my email for such and such?" We are completely honest with each other. But Privacy is something that everyone needs, it is not about hiding things.

well i am not going to lie in the past i have snooped but what i have discovered is seek and you will find! after a complete strike out i have learned that somethings are just better left untouched my husband has complete trust in me so i believe that he deserves the same.