motherhood, babies, time, parenting

Many congratulations on your new baby. Your feelings at the moment are perfectly normal and natural, and are shared I'm sure by mothers the world over. Please enjoy this special time with your baby and enjoy holding him close and being his number one. It will change as he grows older and becomes less dependant on you, and you can never repeat this experience. When he's a teenager and treats you like his personal maid, you'll wish you had *more* time with him!! At the moment, please don't worry about other things in your house. Your housework will wait, you can eat take outs if need be, even MyLot isn't important in the great scheme of things. Consider getting a baby sling so that you can move around the house with your baby close, but have both of your hands free to get on with things. Believe me, it's easier now that when he's a toddler & wants to be into everything but isn't old enough to understand what's safe & what isn't!! Good luck. You sounds like you'll be a marvellous Mom.

i'm not sure how old your baby is now, or if it is your first. i have a nearly nine month old daughter and for the first three months or so i was in absolute turmoil. mainly because every second of every day is suddenly just for your baby. everything else comes second. no wait, housework comes second, your partner comes third and you come last! i think you adjust though, personally i'm finding it all much easier now because my little one has a routine, i know how my day goes, what chores i have to do etc and we have both got to know one another. mia never wanted to be put down either and its exhausting! you're thinking of all the chores you have to while bored to tears sitting in a room holding your baby feeling incredibly isolated and despairing. i wondered will my life always feel this hard now? and you're thinking i should get the baby used to being put down, thats what everyone says but i can't face the thought of him/her waking up right now. i don't think it will be so hard with a second baby because i know now there's light at the end of the tunnel. There's light at the end of the tunnel for you too. you have to get to know your baby, relax a little and don't be afraid to let him cry now and again. he needs to learn if you leave the room you will come back. i know this may sound bad now but also if you are stressed and upset, your baby will pick up on this and be fretful too. try to let go and relax if you can. (i know it's easy to say!). i've been dying to have a bath and things and just not been able to leave the baby. and if your partner works you have the responsibility in the evening and through the night too. it will get easier i promise. hang on in there. and you;re allowed to complain - it's hard work, that doesn't change if you wanted the baby or not. (although i always feel bad if i complain too - even in my head - motherhood is cruel that way!).

Congratulations with your new baby...You know what I had 5 of my own but each time I had them I rejoice even though at times I get tired. You should tell your husband how you feel and let him know you need him to help. I let my husband help. He should because he's the daddy and daddy's take care of babies too. Try talking to him about it.

Having my kids is the most beautiful experience I've had in my entire life! When I had my first child, I was like you. I almost never wanted to put the baby down on her bed. But it wasn't doing anything good for me, nor for the baby either. She was getting too used to being carried around all the time. So I had to change that. I learned that on the first 4-5 months after birth, the baby sleeps most of the time. If she cried, she was either hungry or wet. She will start seeking for more attention by the time she can already roll on her chest. You could take this opportunity to do some other things for yourself.

Congrats on your new baby. Your feelings at this time are very normal. Newborns are totally dependent on you. You really must take the time to be away now and then. Even if all you do is go to the grocery store by yourself. Stop by a friends house on the way home from the store for a quick coffee or something. This time goes by so quickly so make sure you are takeing enough care of yourself to enjoy and remember these precious newborn moments. Before you know it they are gone and you are trying to remember what their little whimper used to sound like. Another thing to remember. You are your childs life and source of comfort and happiness. You have to be strong, healthy and happy to be everything your child deserves. Be well, tired mommy. You will survive and won't even remember the sleepless nights someday.

Yes i must admit having a new baby takes a little getting used to. You are never prepared for the demand they can have.But after the initial shock, sleep deprevation, and a lack of personal time you start to adjust. With my first child i suffered {p.p.d} although back then they didn't have a name for it. I felt sad all the time and cried alot my mother called it the baby blues.Thankfully it didn't last long and i was able to enjoy my baby.There's no doubt that you love your child it's just one of those things that you go through as a new mother.

Welcome to Mommyhood. I found that I was going crazy home with the baby all day. There are a lot of classes you can take with your baby. You can get out and meet other Moms with their babies. Don't give up, all Moms go through the same thing, you'll soon get the past the hard stuff. I know it seems forever, but, time really does go fast. Another thing you can do is ask someone to come over and baby sit for an hour or so just so you can go out for a walk, or go to the hairdresser or something.

Have you tried babywearing? You can get a sling and do household chores and the baby is comforted by being close. Just remember they are only so little for a short period of time, some things can wait. If he feels you are stressed, he'll be stressed too ;)

Yeah i know xactly how y feel, now my son is almost 3, but just 1 yr back, it was very difficult. I have to do everything on my own and yeah no time of my own. But dont worry time just flies by and he is all grown up. Whenever ur husband is with you are at nights just ask him to help you out with the baby as much as he can. Take out time when he sleeps and finish your work, u gotta do it fast though. You can get some help 4rm others. But it just passes by and you feel like i wish he was small again, so i cud spend even more time with him like i did...

That was what I have gone through when I had my first baby. It likes all I did was attending to my baby needs. I was like a prisoner at my own home, no freedom anymore. But then I thought, this is my baby and he is helpless without my love and comfort. I tried my best to adapt to the new role and succeeded. Just remember that it is only for the first three to four months. After the second month, your baby will start to smile and that is going to be your most beautiful moment. And each month there is going to be some new amazing things your baby learn. After that, you will enjoy her every minute. Get your husband to help you. Perhaps once a week, you arrange for a day off for yourself. You will love being a mom.

congratulations for the new baby! you know that's normal...i remember myself by the time my daughter is alive...i had forgotten about myself, i even remember i didn't took a bath for 2 days because i can't leave her alone and i had no one to replace me of looking after her...maybe you should try not to cuddle him so much...he got used of you holding him that's why he always go after you cuddling him...anyway, your baby can't go on you holding him every now and then...it's stressing...try not to hold him as much...i remember i had this small teddy bear and i let my daughter sleep beside the bear so she will be used of having the bear and not me so she can sleep even without me holding her while sleeping...i learned that babies has a very good sense of smell and he got used of you..its proven somehow because when my baby cries when i'm near the room she stops crying she knows i'm there already...so if the baby will get used of the bear's smell...he will not cry as much when your not around while sleepin...hope this works for you...

I just had a baby not long ago,but he needs to learn to comfort himself to sleep when you put him down,because you keep holding him all the time,he will start to expect you to do it as he gets older.It would be the best for the both you. You need time to yourself usually while he is sleeping,and thats a good time to get chores done,and spend some alone time.

Oh you brought tears to my eyes, I had four and wish I could send you my arms to give you that precious break you must take. Trust your instincts and try others advice you will find a way to rejuvenate. Your feelings are normal, so, so normal. You may hear women who say the opposite but remember everyone has different support systems. If you have any use one soon. Those you allow around your newborne will develope bonds as well. Maybe, Grandma or Daddy can step up while you take a breath. My mother always told me "God only loans you children he takes them back whenever he wants". Maybe thats why I went on to foster 28 more kids. Hey-Don't all mothers complain! It was my best job, I was good at it but I cried, complained and celebrated sometimes at the same time. I guess I was just multitasking. I am 51 and my kids are grown and sometimes my arms ache of emptiness (just for a minute)then I smile and remember. Good Luck Good Mommy Ps. Way to go mom you reached out-the internet can be a lifeline or laughline for you.

i also had a baby a few months ago..i experienced exactly what you're going thru right now...but then 3 months after giving birth, he's not as fussy and cry baby anymore..my baby learned our routine day in day out(and so did I) and he finally settled in a routine.. Of course babies are different..but if you could learn to settle in his ways, he will settle in yours... at the end of the day, you'll feel tired as usual but then as you've mentioned, you wanted him..therefor, do everything you can without feeling down... as for not having a day for your self..why not tell your husband you also need a breather from all these, from time to time...and tell him that when you get back, you'll feel refreshed and relaxed...

Well firstly it does get easier bu the first weeks and months can be difficult. What you are feeling is totally normal, I could never leave mine to cry either. Have you tried swaddling? if baby likes to be cuddled it might be just the thing simply put his arms by his side and swaddle him in a blanket nice and tightly this also stops the flailing arms (as they have no control) and can help to stop them from waking them selves when their arms fling up. Or maybe a sling so baby is nice and close to you but you have two arms free to get some chores done or simply sit and read a book or relax your arms, because as tiny as they are they soon feel like a tonne weight! But mostly relax and dont try and do too much forget the house work concentrate on the baby and yourself first and then if you get anything else done inbetween well its a bonus, and when visitors come to see you ask for a little help and make them make their own cup of tea and one for you while they are at it. It will all come together in time but a new baby is hard work and demanding but it does get easier

Well i have a one month old and a 1 yr old and they both wake up during the night to drink milk if its not one it the other i havent had a good nights sleep in 1 yr going to be 2 with my new baby but just looking at my kids makes me happy i play with them all i do all day is feed them change them bath them and when their both asleep i clean the house when my husband gets home from work i cook and clean some more then go to bed and lay down to relax. as for the baby not wanting to be but down my one month old daughter dose the same thing to me sometimes but when she dose i put her in the swing and she loves it u should try and get one it is the best lol