Love or Lust
By jamie08
@jamie08 (430)
United States
April 10, 2008 1:10pm CST
Ok well me and my boyfriend have been together for a year now. We have been through SOOOOOOO many fights and arguments and we have broken up sometimes. never for along time though. I love him so much but i am just so insecure and i dont trust him. I dont know if i will ever be able to get past that. We had a rough beggining. we started out by jumping into things way too quick. the first month we were together i got pregnant. but i lost the baby. there are so many things in this relationship that i really cant get over. I want to be able to trust him and everything but i have a feeling that he will treat me the same way every other guy did. i start arguments with him all the time and i dont even know why. sometimes i dont even mean to. its very rare when we never argue. i dont know what to do anymore because i dont want to loose him but it feels like i already have. if you have any advice or comments please tell me i really would love to know
2 responses
@kalass (611)
• India
10 Apr 08
This isnt an advice or a comment or this is not what i recommend u to do. This is just thing i did in a similar situation. It may be idealistic and impractical to hear but believe it could work. It worked out from me atleast. Dont take ur life to complicated just love him. Dont expect anything in return, atleast try not to. In those times when he does even a little thing for u, u will be so happy about. Try to trust him and show him that u do trust him, remember u will get ur chances to show ur love that too when u both r living together u will surely get a lot of chances. Do the things to him whatever u expect for him. For eg U expect loyalty so be loyal to him. Surely these things will change a person. Even if it doent u will not have any guilt on ur part and u will never will worried with this relation for the rest of ur life, even though u may still continue to love him. Just neglect this if it sounds too much impractical. i Just wrote it as a response.
@jamie08 (430)
• United States
10 Apr 08
i am not going to neglect it i am going to tell you thank you. see we have been living together for about 10-11 months now. but for some reason i still cant trust him. i go through moments where it like omg he is cheating on me and everything and i try to find something. then there are other times when i have total trust in him . my past relationship has just really messed me up in the head and i am just trying to straighten everything back out. But sometimes it just seems like it will never go away an di will never be able to trust or love someone fully again. you know what i mean ?
@kalass (611)
• India
10 Apr 08
Ya i can understand u. The pain of getting hurt once gives u the fear that u may be hurt again. Believe me ur fear is quite valid than anyother fear in this world, for it hurts more than anything else. But u know u haev to get over those fears one day or the other. Believe cant have an happy life if u dont leave this fear. U have to get over wat has happened in the past. Think u r going to succeed that will make u happy but if u fail think again there is no harm in that. u know this is the simple thing that makes me keep goin keep lovin some one in life without expecting too many things(not anything that is impossible). I am sure u will get over this hurdle because we are supposed to cross hurdles in our life and thats when life gets interesting. After a few years may be u will understand this. Anyways all the best for ur future and thanks saying u dont neglect this, it feels good when people agree with ur views.
@jstaubin (423)
• United States
10 Apr 08
The only advice that I can give you is that you shouldn't not trust him because of what other have done to you in the past. Trust me I went through most of my not trusting anyone and soon found that I was all alone which hurt more then what anyone could ever do to me. So please do not punish him for the faults of others and try not to make your life to complicated. Sometimes we get into our own heads and make things into something bigger then what they really are.
