having a BAD day, week, month, year - when will it end?

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ok so now im really cranky, just typed up why im having a bad day so far and my computer crashed. so now i have to do it again! not happy jan! so anyway it is 8am and ive been up since 6am with my 2 yr old and 3 yr old, they are both being typical kids, mummy mummy mummy, little ones just done a poo, great. i wonder what else will go wrong over the next 12 hours! after leaving their tossa father 5months ago cause he was abusive as if that wouldnt be stress enough, but 2months ago i found out my youngest has an autoimmune disease, probably dermatomyositis or lupus, both of these are very scarey illnesses especially for a 2 yr old to have! so we have been to and from hospital while they try to diagnose her. we started steroid treatment last week, and shes getting stronger, but so moody - its like roid rage at times. their dad still bugging me to take him back, reckons he'll change. i think not! so hes harrasing me and using the little ones illness to make me feel guilty for leaving him and ruining the family. we've never been better since i got rid of him. he use to yell at me for letting them make too much noise, how quiet can you really keep toddlers though hey? they are little noise machines. so i basically have pms today and i just want to explode on the inside, i am tired and full of worry and stress. i just want it all to stop and for me and my kids to be happy and healthy and for their dad to just accept things and move on. he is a better dad now that he doesnt live with them cause he acutally appreciates them not when he sees them what a rant, thanks to all who listened, i feel a bit better now