Why so Some divorced women kep their Married name?

switching yer surname back is rather saying the marriage itself didnt happen. he really hasnt any rights to be offended by her keeping the name. he WAS married to her, and willingly gave her that name, regardless of how the marriage turned out in the end.

She probably still carries a torch for him. I still have mine lol but its only because I plan to marry again soon and I didnt want to go thru all the changing of documents twice in a short period. I can also see the same last name as the kids bit in a way I guess. Though I sure dont carry a torch for my ex and if I were single I would of taken my maiden name back.

Hello there, this is a very good question. I believe some divorced women kept their married names mainly are because they don’t want to go through the complicated documentations all over again while they have to pay extra to re-new their ID card, Passport or Driving license. Another reason I think is to avoid the query or embarrassment made by the third party. E.g. Why your children’s family name are different yours? Are you divorced? Are you a single mum?

Well I got a divorce after being married 21 years. I kept my ex's last name, because that is my childrens last name, and also what everyone knew me by.I am also disabled, all my paperwork and things have this name on was much easier to just keep that name.

Wow, I sense a little jealousy here. When I divorced I kept MY name (I consider it was mine after having it for so long) because it was the same as my children's, and also because I had that name for many years and didn't want to have to change everything, and everyone knew me by that name, etc. When you divorce you can't really wipe out everything that you shared while you were married, it doesn't work that way, whether you dislike someone or not. I know a lot of women do take their maiden name back, but if his name is one that she is more comfortable with for whatever reason, then why shouldn't she be allowed to do what is best for her? No different than allowing a woman to continue using her maiden name even after marrying. There may be several reasons, and it's her choice.

Maybe she hadn't got over the relationship yet...

I live in Illinois in the U.S. All the divorced women I know have kept their ex's last name. I really don't know if it is tradition or the hassle of having to go and change documents like social security, driver's license, etc. back to the original maiden name. Most just keep the name until they remarry. For those like my college roommate that never took her husband's name to begin with, she didn't have any problems after her divorce to change paperwork. Actually, I hadn't even thought about it before as being a problem for a new wife. My ex lives 2000 miles away, so that never was an issue anyway. If this is not necessarily tradition in Australia, then she is probably just trying to irritate you and she's accomplishing that task. If nothing is said, perhaps she will not get the amusement from torturing you and will just change it on her own or even better, get remarried. Sorry that this is so upsetting for you. Hope it all works out well.

There are various reasons for this. I kept my husband's last name after my divorce. It was the only name that I was known by in my profession, for one reason. The other reason was that I did want to keep the same last name as my kids. I earned a reputation in my profession using this name and I had it for almost as long as I did my maiden name, so why NOT keep it? It was my name!

I kept my exhusband's name for about 6 months after we divorced. Then one day I woke up and asked myself who the heck was the woman with that name. It wasn't who I wanted to be. I filed to have my maiden name back. Would you believe that he had to sign paperwork to allow me to get it back! That was an eye opener.

Hi Jenny. I can totally relate to your feelings. I am one divorced woman, however, who did keep her husband's last name. Funny thing, I did keep it for some of the same reasons you mentioned. The kids asked that I would keep it. They wanted me to have the same last name as them. Plus I asked my ex-hubby and he said yes. Besides we are still good friends. As a matter of fact our friends ask all the time when are we getting back together. Well, that's another story. But in any case that's why I kept his name. Plus I don't want to hassle changing my name back to my maiden name on all those legal documents; driver's license, social security, credit cards etc. That's my story.

I guess it is just easier for them to just leave it like it is. I think some of them still have feelings for their ex-spouse also. I don't think it is right to keep someone elses name either but some spouses just cannot let it go. It isn't fair when the other spouse has moved on, but some marriages can be reconciled too, so I guess that is why some of them keep the name. I know what you mean in your case though. I think the ex is just doing it in spite.

in some cases,they probably just don't feel like filling out the paperwork to change it back. in the us you'd have to get a new id,social security card,change your bank accounts,etc. me,i'd want to get rid of it.

There are a lot of posible reasons why she is still holding on to your husband's surname... 1. Maybe the hate thing is just a facade... and deep inside she still has feeling for him... or that he is the best thing that ever happened to him... the holding on to the surname is to only way to go back to the time when she was happiest the most... 2. Maybe it is a way to spite your husband and you... women can do a lot of crazy things just to get back at men who they think did them wrong... 3. Maybe her maiden name is really not that good to hear...

I kept my ex-husband's last name until I re-married. I would have changed my last name if he married first out of respect for his new wife. But that is because we are friends. If I didn't know her or like her then I probably wouldn't have bothered. The funny thing is, she wouldn't have cared if I had kept the last name. But it's because of things like that that allow us to be friends. Neither one of us see any reason that we can't be friends. I was married to her husband, so what? I don't want him back...ever. She knows this. I don't see anything wrong with wanting to share a last name with your children either. It may be old style belief to you but maybe it isn't for others. My husband's ex-wife kept his last name as well. I think she may have changed it last weekend though when she got married again. I don't know, I didn't ask. I know lots of people who keep their married name after divorce for various reasons.

I have been divorced for 8 years. I kept my ex's name for my daughter. He has never said anything about it. I suppose if he mentioned that it bothered him, I would think about it. And by the way, what is wrong with old world beliefs?

Do you have children yourself, Jenny? I think it is an understandable thing that some women want to keep the same last name as their child. There is so much disconnecting going on in the lives of divorced children and I think that is one connection that is easy enough to maintain. It really is all about the children in situations such as these.

He must really dislike her! I've been divorced 3 times, the first time I changed back to my maiden name, there were no children involved, and I was only married a year. However, when I divorced the second time, I had a daughter, and I had been known by that name for 5 years. The third, I had had another daughter, and I had been known by that name for 16 years. So, I still have my ex's last name, it's never been an issue, with him, or my kids. It would have not only taken the court to change my name back, but social security change, bank records, credit cards, you get the picture. My s/o was married before, his ex has his last name, it doesn't really bother him or me, they also have a daughter together. Now, as for keeping the last name because she 'prefers' it, kind of a strange reason. Unless she is going by Mrs. instead of Ms. why make it a big issue, unless she is using his last name in some way that is causing you or him problems, that could lead to legal problems.

She is probably just doing it because she don't feel like dealing with the hassle of changing her name back. A new SSI card, new license, change at the bank, new checks, change on all legal documents, bill, paper work. I think she is being lazy. When I get my divorce, I'm pretty sure I will change my name back to my maiden name. My sister-in-law did it when she divorced her husband a few years ago, and I don't think it really was too hard on her to do it. Your husband's ex may also be doing this just for spite too!

i think the reason is that deep inside their heart, they still love their ex husbands that's why they still use their ex-husband's surname.

It really is her choice. She can keep it forever if she wants. Your husband's divorce attorney should have put it in the divorce papers that she HAD to change it. My first husband did that, although I would have anyway. (He was abusive and someone I'd just like to forget!)