Why do we tell children not to talk to strangers but then......
@cinderella2007 (2662)
April 22, 2008 4:19am CST
encourage them to say hello to people they dont know even if the parent/guardian does???
I work as a cashier and am a qualified nursery nurse so I make time for the children that come into our store, mainly just saying hello to them or waving at them. If they come in regularly I will spend more time talking to them and the person they are with.
When you say hello to a child and they dont respond, why do parents encourage them to say hello because that lady said hi to them. Im a stranger, they get told not to talk to them so are we contradicting ourselves by making children say hi when spoken to??
I know it is rude to ignore people when they talk to us but I would be very confused about this, I am now not sure about a child!!
2 people like this
4 responses
@mummymo (23706)
•
22 Apr 08
I have often thought about that myself sweetheart - usually as I am getting embarrassed that one or other of my kids wouldn't speak to someone! lol I am a qualified nursery nurse too sweetheart, or early childhood educator as they are now called! There are a lot of discrepancies between what we tell children and how we often expect them to behave but that is part of having children I'm afraid and we always work through them! xxx
1 person likes this
@skinnychick (6905)
• United States
22 Apr 08
I think it's different when the parent is with the child. The parent talks to the person and the child assumes that because the parent is talking to someone then that would be ok.
I think parents should just explain the difference. I don't see any harm in talking to a store cashier or another adult that the parent is talking to.
@SViswan (12051)
• India
23 Apr 08
When I mean 'don't talk to strangers', I mean when I am not around.
But I think a 'Hi' is fine even if I am not around. Someone being nice and smiling and saying 'Hi' will not harm my child. But when it gets further, there is a chance that the 'Hi' was to get close to the child for other reasons.
Once when we were travelling in a train, I was putting our luggage away when a man said 'hi' to my son(who was 5 at the time). He returned the 'hi'....very soon the man asked him what his name was and where he lived. At once, my son turned to me (I wasn't listening when this happened)...and asked me if the man was a stranger...and told me he was asking details. I was embarassed...but I know my son did the right thing. I explained to the man that my son isn't allowed to talk to strangers and thankfully he understood.
My son's a very friendly child and talks easily to people. But he now knows that he can't give out personal details to anyone...and that I prefer that he keeps things to just a 'Hi' especially when I am not around.
@cinderella2007 (2662)
•
23 Apr 08
Atleast your son knows he can say hi to people but not tell strangers personaal details. He did the right thing, even though it may have been embarrassing at the time.
Its hard to explain strangers from peopel they see all the time even though they are still strangers. I suppose when we teach this we mean people they have never seen, but then its not just strangers who abduct child, sometimes its by people they know!!
It really is a tough world!!
@SViswan (12051)
• India
24 Apr 08
Yes, I understand what you are saying...like the people we see and talk to regularly...the guy at the grocery store, the bus driver,etc. My son knows he's not allowed to give personal details out to ANYONE. They've drilled it into his head at schoo, too (especially since he's a very social child). They had someone come in and talk about the good touch and bad touch...and the kids had to enact out different scenarios where they were made aware not to get into a car with anyone (even people they knew) unless their parents told them it was okay.
When my son was younger, my husband once went to school to pick him up. The teacher had never met my husband and it was always me who picked him up. I had warned my husband and asked him to take a note from me which he refused. The teacher refused to send my son with him even after my son said he was 'Daddy'...lol. I had to call her up and talk to her. I'm actually glad she did that...because the kid next door calls my husband 'Daddy' and his father 'Appa'. Anything's possible in this world today and it's better to be safe.
@Foxfire1875 (2010)
•
22 Apr 08
I suppose it should be more when the child is on his/her own that he/she shouldn't talk to strangers.
Surely if the parent/guardian does say hello that is different but maybe children can't distinguish between what they have been told by their parent/guardian. It must get confusing to be told not to speak to strangers and then to be told the opposite.
