iam not happy because of he

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after he cheating me, i am very deep and everything can increasing my heart. after some day & night, i realize that i really fall for him. i never think about i can c=become a gay, thought i am not treat gay as special. but now. i am gay!!! how can i do? i can hardly forget him. he is so important in my heart and when i dreaming, i dreamed all about him. what should i do? to see a doc? i am very lazy now. i want to nowhere.